


it will be alright (or we all hope so)

by hybridposie



Category: Legacies (TV 2018), The Originals (TV), The Vampire Diaries (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, True Love, childhood best friends, slowburn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-30
Updated: 2020-07-03
Packaged: 2021-02-19 06:10:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 45,413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22039747
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hybridposie/pseuds/hybridposie
Summary: Landon Kirby & Hope Mikaelson are best friends and have been since they were five.Orthe Handon fanfic where Landon is the popular rocker dude who has his heartbroken and Hope is his childhood best friend who he always seems to be able to count on.
Relationships: Ethan Machado/Hope Mikaelson, Landon Kirby & Hope Mikaelson, Landon Kirby & Josie Saltzman, Landon Kirby/Hope Mikaelson, Milton "MG" Greasley/Lizzie Saltzman, Penelope Park & Josie Saltzman, Penelope Park/Josie Saltzman
Comments: 182
Kudos: 205





	1. the man who can’t be moved

**Author's Note:**

> Here it is!!! This is going to be longer (hopefully) then my last Handon fanfic. I really enjoy writing Handon! This one Landon is a dad and Hope is the best aunt. Josie & Landon we’re together but aren’t anymore and they have a six year old son named Jack. Josie and Penelope will be in this one more but more so for angst and argumentative purposes. I hope you enjoy.  
> Also, since I’m writing two, I’m thinking of posting this: 10 comments (different people) and I’ll post the next chapter two days after. Let’s see how it works!!

The thing about heartbreak is that you can never really control when it happens — or at least when it happens to you. You’re able to control it if you do it to someone else but it comes as a shock to you when it happens to you. Landon Kirby noticed that when his girlfriend of a year, Josie Saltzman ended things with him because of her confusion on her sexuality. Landon of course couldn’t be mad about it because he’s not the man his parents raised if he was. 

He will always love Josie and Josie needed time to figure things out then he was willing to let her figure it out herself but what hurts the most is who she decided to figure it out with. Penelope Park is a person that Landon Kirby grew to love and grew an amazing friendship with over the last year. 

He never thought in a million years that she would be the person who was in the middle of the heartbreak or the reason behind the heartbreak. Landon turned to music whenever he needed an escape from the reality of the situation. He doesn’t know why but it just helps him breath. 

He and Josie still have something in common and that’s their six year old little boy, Jack. Landon is twenty six years old and the best thing that has ever happened to him was the birthday of Jackson Oliver Kirby, or well Jack for short. He was expecting to be a father but it happened and he wouldn’t have it any other way. 

Jack doesn’t ask a lot of questions on why mommy and daddy aren’t together anymore and Landon isn’t sure if that normal or not. He doesn’t want Jack to ask because he isn’t sure how he’s going to respond to them. Jack spends a lot of time with Josie — which means he’s around Penelope too and Landon normally wouldn’t care about that but he’s afraid his son isn’t going to know him anymore. 

Penelope and Josie decided to move in with each other about six months ago — two weeks after Josie and Landon ended things and that killed Landon more than words can describe. It’s like their eight year relationship meant nothing. It’s like the kid they share together — doesn’t matter to her. 

Landon wants to see Jack more but Josie kept telling him that Jack is better off living with her because Landon is never home but that’s not true. Landon is home all the time now since he decided to be a freelance musician. “I’m just asking for a weekend with him, Jo, please?” Landon begged as he paced around his large apartment in LA. 

_ “Last time you asked for a weekend with him, Landon. He spent most of the time with Hope because you were working. You always seem to be working nowadays,”  _ Josie reminded him, allowing Landon to cringe at the memory. There was a reason for that, a real reason. 

Landon pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed deeply. “I did that so I could afford to pay for his daycare, what else do you expect me to do, huh? He’s my son, Josette. I have the right to see him, is that too much to ask?” Landon chuckled. 

_ “It is when I can’t trust that you will follow through,”  _ she said truthfully, there was a lot of background noise so where she was, she was surrounded by people.  _ “He’s hanging out with Penelope and her mom this weekend anyways,”  _ she added. 

“So your stand in daddy gets to see him whenever she wants but when his own father does, you have to raincheck him, do you realize how unfair this is?” Landon cried out. 

_ “She’s not a stand in anything, Landon! Stop trying to make this about you and your ego for a second and listen to me.”  _ Josie groaned in frustration.  _ “Jack likes Penelope, he did when she used to come over the house all the time. That’s never going to change despite my relationship with her,”  _ she added before taking a deep breath in.  _ “It’s not like he forgot about you because he still asks about you, asks where his daddy is and why his daddy isn’t around anymore,”  _ she said. 

Landon chuckled in disbelief. “Yeah? And did you tell him it’s because his mommy won’t let it happen?” He asked. 

_ “Don’t do that, Landon. I’m trying to protect my son,”  _ Josie stated. She’s getting angry now.  _ “You’re the one who is acting like a jealous asshole because you can’t get passed the fact that I’ve moved on with my life,”  _ she added. 

Landon let out a frustrated sigh. “Can I talk to him?” Landon asked as he changed the subject completely. 

_ “He’s in bed,”  _ Josie stated softly. 

Landon tilted his head back, trying not to cry. “Two minutes, Josie. That’s all I’m asking, please? I just need to hear his voice — it’s been three weeks,” he added. 

There was a moment of silence on the other side of the phone and Landon patiently waits for her to respond. There is a sigh. _ “Give me a second,”  _ she said and then she hung the phone up. Landon let out a sigh as he looked at his background on his phone of his son. 

Landon didn’t realize that them breaking up could lead to a situation like this. He barely gets to see his son. He doesn’t know what he did wrong but he obviously did something and now Josie barely lets Jack come over. Landon sat down on his leather couch and grabbed the glass of scotch from the glass table and took a sip, waiting for the call. 

He leaned the empty glass against his forehead and stared at his phone screen. The tears are definitely forming in his eyes. If only his mom was in the picture, she’d know how to handle a situation like this. He could always call his dad but he’s got his own family now. His phone lit up and he let out a chuckle when he saw who it was. 

**_Penelope Park_ **

Of course he’s with Penelope. He took a deep breath in and released as he swiped to answer and then put the phone to his ear. “Where is he?” he said coldly. 

_ “Not a very nice way to answer the phone,”  _ Penelope stated. 

Landon chuckled. “I don’t feel like acting nice to you right now,” he added rudely. Penelope let out a chuckle. “Can I just please speak to my son?” He added, scratching the back of his head casually. “Or are you going to steal him from me too?” Landon shot next. 

_ “Whatever Landon,”  _ Penelope huffed as Landon heard something else behind her. There was a little bit of shuffling and then the sound of the door opening.  _ “Jack, daddy is on the phone,”  _ her voice said, kind of far from the phone. 

Landon’s leg began to shake as he patiently waits for the sound of his son’s voice. He hasn’t seen or heard from him in about three weeks, Josie kept pushing it off.  _ “Daddy?”  _ Jack’s sweet voice filled Landon’s ear. 

Landon smiled widely but sadly. “Hey buddy,” he said, standing to his feet. “I’m sorry to wake you up but I just want to see how you were,” he said. 

_ “I’m okay,”  _ he stated.  _ “Penny brought me to an arcade today since mommy had to work,”  _ he added. 

“That’s awesome,” Landon said, smiling. “Maybe next time I can take you to the carnival like last time, you had fun didn’t you?” He asked his five year old. 

_ “Yeah,”  _ Jack said, laughing.  _ “Auntie Hope getting dunked into that dunk tank was the best thing that happened that day,”  _ he added, Landon chuckled at that. Hope and Jack always did get along.  _ “Can she come?”  _ He asked. 

Landon nodded his head, even though Jack couldn’t see it. “Yeah of course buddy, I’m sure she will love to see you,” 

_ “When am I going to see you again, daddy?”  _ Jack asked and that’s broke Landon’s heart. He didn’t know how he was supposed to answer a question like that. He doesn’t want to make Josie look like the bad guy because she is still his mother and the little boy worships his mom. 

Landon’s lip quivered. “I don’t know, bud,” he said softly. “I have to make sure with your mom if it’s okay if I come pick you up one day from school — and then we can spend the entire afternoon together,” he said happily. 

_ “But I wanna stay at your house,”  _ he said.  _ “Why do you need mommy’s permission to see me? Penny doesn’t,”  _ he asked. 

“Look, bud. Your mom loves you very much and so do I,” Landon started as the front door to his apartment opens and entered Hope Mikaelson, Landon’s best friend since childhood, they share an apartment. “We want what’s best for you so I have to make sure it’s okay with your mom before I do stuff with you, just like she does,” Landon said. 

_ “I miss you daddy,”  _ Jack said. 

Landon let out a shaky sigh as Hope dropped her keys on the table and took her backpack off her back — watching her best friend on the verge of tears. She knows how much this whole break up has been on him and she wants to kick Josie’s ass for putting him through it but they have Jack to think about. “I miss you too, buddy,” Landon said softly. 

Hope crossed her arms over her chest and leaned against the closest wall to her and watched him.  _ “Are you coming to my baseball game this weekend?”  _ Jack asked. Landon has no idea about the baseball game because Josie never told him about it.  _ “It’s my first one,”  _ he added. 

Landon smiled. “I wouldn’t miss it, kiddo,” 

_ “Okay, good,”  _ he stated happily.  _ “And I guess if it’s okay with mommy, we can get ice cream after,”  _ he added. 

Landon nodded his head. “Yeah of course buddy and maybe she’ll let you spend the night too. Auntie Hope will get all the puzzles and stuff ready for you,” Landon said as he looked up at Hope who stood there with a smile on her face. 

_ “Can you ask her to make sure they are animal puzzles? The geographic ones are boring,”  _ he stated. 

Landon chuckled. “I’ll let her know, buddy,” 

_ “Good,”  _ Jack said.  _ “Okay, I’m going to go to sleep now,”  _ he said next.  _ “I love you, dad,”  _ he finished. 

Landon felt a tear fell from his eye. “I love you too,” and then Landon heard him hand the phone be handed to Penelope. He wanted to hang up but her voice caught him. 

_ “I’ll talk to Jo about Saturday,”  _ she said. 

Landon’s face turned cold and Hope knew it was either Josie or Penelope. “Don’t bother,” he said and then he hung the phone up and threw it on the couch across from him before running his hands through his hair. 

Hope walked over to him. “How is he?” Hope asked. 

Landon lets out a sigh and shrugged. “He’s confused, just like I expected him to be.” He said. “Doesn’t understand why I can’t come pick him whenever he wants to see me and of course, I don’t want to sit there and bash Josie, she’s his mother, Hope. I’m torn between two situations here,”

“I don’t understand why the fuck she won’t let you have him for at least a weekend? That doesn’t make any fucking sense,” she swore as she sat down on the couch. 

“I’ve always wanted to be a father,” Landon stated. “And because of Josie I get to be one and because of me, she gets to be a mother so I don’t know what I did wrong, Hope,” he chuckled sadly. 

Hope felt terrible for her best friend — Landon is a great dad and then everything suddenly changed when Josie decided she was attracted to Penelope rather than Landon anymore. He was heartbroken. He was going to buy a ring and everything and she broke it off by telling him she kiss Penelope, while Jack was in the house. 

Landon wanted to take her to court but Hope talked him out of it because Josie didn’t deserve that. She knows that Landon does deserve this but he needs to show Jack that he’s willing to fight for him in a responsible way, unlike Josie. 

Hope didn’t know how to respond — but she knew that Landon didn’t want to talk about it because she could see it in his body movements. “Where were you?” He asked, looking at the time on his wrist. “It’s ten o’clock,” he added. 

Hope smiles softly. “I was with Ethan, studying for our final that is next week. I told you about it yesterday,” she said. 

Landon sighed. “Right, Sorry.” He apologized. 

Hope chuckled. “You don’t have to apologize, Lan. You’ve got other stuff on your mind, it’s completely normal,” 

“I just worry about you,” Landon said and Hope gave him a soft smile and a nod. “At least I know that Ethan will take care of you,” he added. 

Hope loves Ethan, she really does but there is a different kind of love that she feels for Landon but she can’t say anything about it — she definitely wasn’t able to say anything about it when he was with Josie. She was also kind of happy when they broke it off but she knew how much the break up effect Landon and she hates seeing her friend sad. 

“Jack’s got a baseball game this weekend — he asked if you could come, can you make it?” Landon asked. 

Hope nodded without hesitation. “Yeah, I'll be there and so will Ethan,” Hope said and Landon gave her a smile before holding his arms out towards her. Hope stands from the couch and walked into his arms. Her heart aches knowing that they will never be anything more but she needs to get used to that. And she’s with Ethan, a great guy who loves her 

“Thank you for being here for me,” Landon said, holding her tightly. Hope shut her eyes and leaned more into his chest, not responding. She just wants to savor this moment. Landon leaned back and then leaned in and kissed her cheek before grabbing her shoulders and pulling away completely. “I’ll talk to you in the morning?” He said. 

Hope smiled, cheeks burning from the kiss. “Yeah, get some sleep,” she said chuckling. Landon gives her hand a squeeze before walking towards the steps. Hope shut her eyes and let out a long sigh as she pushed her hair back. She waits until he’s upstairs and whisper loudly. “Dammit,” She walked over to the couch and sat down before pulling her phone out of her pocket. It’s ten o'clock, which means it’s midnight in Uruguay where Lizzie is. Maybes she’s awake. 

She dialed her number and FaceTimes her before leaning back against her couch. Lizzie answers in ten seconds. “Hey, pretty girl,” Lizzie greets her with a smile. 

“I’m surprised you're still awake,” Hope comments as she kicks off her tennis shoes. “It’s passed MG’s bed time,” she chuckled softly before laying down on the couch. 

Lizzie laughs and rolls her eyes. “He’s actually the reason why were up so fucking late — he wanted to watch a movie before we went to bed — we just finished it so you caught me at the right time, what’s up?” She asked. 

Hope takes a deep breath in and releases. “Your sister is getting on my fucking nerves, that’s what’s up,” she said. 

Lizzie rolls her eyes. “What did she do now? Other than piss you off for a small thing again?” She asked. 

“It wasn’t small okay, she broke my best friend’s heart first of all and then she decided to move in with my best friend’s close friend and fuck her two weeks after they split and now, she won’t let him see his own son,” Hope rambles. 

That caught Lizzie’s attention. “Wait really?” Lizzie asked. 

Hope chuckled angrily and nodded her head. “Landon hasn’t seen Jack in three weeks because Josie keeps pushing it off. He hasn’t done anything wrong, Lizzie. He deserves to see his son and your fucking sister won’t let it happen.” 

Lizzie groaned and ran her hand across her face. “Okay, okay. I’ll talk to her — just give me a few days,” she said. “I don’t know what’s up with her — I know I can’t be mad about the way she ended things with Landon because trying to figure out your sexuality is a scary thing — you and I both know that,” Lizzie said and Hope nodded her head. 

Lizzie and Hope dated for a year in high school but decided to break it off when Hope mentioned her love for Landon. Lizzie has been a fan of them since. “I’m not mad at her because she’s into girls, Lizzie. I could care less about that shit and so does Landon but it’s the way she approached it, you know? She cheated on him — with Jack in the house,” 

Lizzie nodded her head. “I know, babe.” She said. “I remember the fight they had — we were all there,” she added. “But Landon was an ass about it too,” she added. 

“He had the right to be in the moment,” Hope defended him. 

Lizzie smiles softly — mentally chuckling at her friend. “You know, you might want to be a little bit more private, Mikaelson. Your inter-crush is showing,” she said. Hope’s cheeks turned red and she shut up. “I don’t understand why you don’t just tell him? He won’t disown you because of it. I mean you’re destined to end up together and soon Mr. Hobbit will realize that,” Lizzie said. 

“He’s not a hobbit,” Hope defended him, it’s like it’s second nature at this point. She can’t control it. Lizzie gave her a look and Hope went to defend herself. “I’ve learned to stick up for him because he doesn’t stick up for himself — because he’s always getting walked on,” she reminded her. 

“You never answered my question, Hope,” Lizzie said and Hope glanced down at her stomach, picking at her shirt. “Why can’t you just tell him how you feel? It will make your life so much easier,” she asked. 

Hope sat up and sighed deeply. “You know when he told me that Josie was pregnant — I was so fucking happy for him. I always knew that he was going to make an amazing dad,”

“I’m sensing a but,” Lizzie said. 

Sadness filled Hope’s eyes as she thought back to the memory. “I hated that it wasn’t me,” she whispered and Lizzie nodded her head softly — feeling bad for her ex. She knows how much Landon means to her. “And I realized that he was never going to see me like that — and that Josie was his one epic love or whatever,” she whispered next. 

Lizzie sighed in frustration. “You don’t know that, okay? There is so much that can happen with you two if you would just tell him that you love him, Hope,” she said. 

“I can’t go up to him and say, “hey, i know this is awkward timing and such but I love you” he will think I’m just being a dork and say I love you back,” she chuckled. 

“That’s when you say, “No, Hobbit. I love you. Like in love,” it’s not that hard, Hope. It’s scary as fuck but it’s not hard as long as you realize that Landon is a great guy — he will do anything to make sure you’re okay, and that you’re happy,” 

Hope knows she right but she’s with Ethan and Landon is definitely not over Josie yet. “I care about him too much to put him through something that might cause him anymore pain,” Hope said, picking at the thread of her scrubs. 

“He loves you, Hope,” Lizzie whispered. “It’s just all about whether or not he’s willing to admit it,” she added. 


	2. breakeven (i’m falling to pieces)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Landon has a dream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Breakeven by “The Script” is the song Landon sings.

Hope stares intensely at him as he made breakfast — why does he have to be shirtless? Hope kept thinking that to herself. He’s always fucking shirtless. And it’s not like she’s complaining but it’s kind of hard to fall out of love with him when he looks like that. He’s so fucking sexy. She mentally screamed at herself as she sipped her coffee. “You look like you’re deep in thought,” Landon mentioned as he cooked his eggs, eyeing Hope with a small smirk. 

Hope rolls her eyes. “Why do you always have to be shirtless?” She asks and Landon gives her a confused expression. “I mean, you could at least shave your chest, it’s getting out of hand,” she adds awkwardly. 

Landon glances down at his chest and then brings one of his hands up to his chest and plays with the hair. “What’s wrong with my chest hair?” He asks with a pout. 

‘Absolutely nothing’ Hope thought to herself. “It’s too much. It’s disgusting,” she said, flicking a piece of her napkin at him, he catches it with ease and looks at her with confusion. 

“You okay, Hope?” Landon asks. 

Hope nods her head, humming as she drinks her coffee. “I’m fine — why are you asking?” she asks, clearing your throat. 

He shrugs his shoulders. “You just seem flushed,” he said. Of course she’s flushed. Your fucking chest it out and she always has a hard time concentrating when you’re shirtless which is all the time. But she can’t tell you because it would ruin your friendship. Her friendship with Landon is everything she has at this point. Her friendship with Josie is gone and her friendship that was building with Penelope has ended quickly. Didn’t last that long if she’s being honest. 

“Can you put a shirt on?” Hope asked kindly. 

Landon didn’t understand. “It’s never bothered you before, Hope. What the hell is going—,” 

“Landon, please?” She practically begged. 

Landon has noticed since they’ve moved in together, she hasn’t been as open as she used to be. He doesn’t know what it is but he’s worried about her — worried for their friendship in a sense. He needs her friendship to survive. Her friendship is all he’s ever known really. “Okay,” Landon agreed as he walked over to the couch and grabbed his sweatshirt and put it over his torso. As he walked back over — Hope wasn’t even making eye contact with him. “You know you can talk to me about anything right?” Landon said. 

Hope nodded her head. “I know,” she whispered. 

“Okay, then tell me what’s got you so worked up? Is it Ethan? Your aunt? Your finals?” He asked, because he is genuinely concerned for his best friend. He wants to know why she’s acting this way. He wants to help her. 

Hope swallowed hard. “I’m uncomfortable talking about it — especially with you,” she said softly. 

Landon smirked. “So it’s about Ethan,” he chuckled. Hope rolled her eyes. “What happened? Did he stick it in the wrong hole?” Landon asked. 

Hope groaned in discomfort. “Oh my god this is why I don’t talk to you about my sex life — that was once and it was dark!” she hid her face in her hands. 

“I’m just trying to start up a conversation,” Landon laughed. 

Hope rolled her eyes at him, rubbing her thumb across the rim of her glass. “We said I love you last night,” Hope said. There was a moment of hesitation from Landon before he chuckled and nodded his head. “I know,” she laughed. 

“Who said it first?” Landon asked. 

“He did,” Hope said, sipping her coffee. “Yeah, we were trying to figure out this question and I guess he found it the perfect time to say it.” She shrugged her shoulders. “He said, “gosh I love you,” I’m pretty sure he didn’t mean to say it because as soon as he did, his cheeks went red.” She added. 

Landon smiled, he is really happy for his best friend but he

can’t help but be jealous of her finding of love. He misses Josie so much but it’s hard for him to admit in front of people because she did break his heart and it’s embarrassing. “I’m happy for you, Hope,” she whispered. 

She nodded his head. “Thank you,” Hope stared into his green eyes and wanted to say it to him but she held it back. She knew it wasn’t the right moment or there will never be a right moment. She will never tell Landon Kirby that she loves him and she knows that now. “Uh so I’m surprised that Jack isn’t into Basketball like his dad,” she added. 

“Yeah I know but he loves baseball and as loved it — who am I to stop that?” Landon asked, smiling ear to ear — he reached into his pants pocket and pulled out his phone and held out a new picture of Jack in his baseball uniform. “He’s so excited that Josie’s said he’s been wearing the uniform to sleep,” he laughed. 

Hope couldn’t help but smile at the picture. “It still amazes me how much he looks like you, Lan,” she whispered. Landon smiled and nodded his head. “I wish I had one,” Hope said casually as she handed him the phone back and walked over to the sink, placing the cup in there. 

“I didn’t think you were ready.” Landon said in a bit of a shock that Hope mentioned that. Hope shrugged her shoulders, leaning her butt against the “Does Ethan want kids?” Landon asked curiously. 

Hope nodded her head. “Yeah we’ve talked about it besides the trying part is fun,” she joked and for some reason Landon couldn’t tell if it was jealousy or protectiveness but he definitely felt something in his chest whenever he talks about Ethan with Hope. He knows it’s protectiveness, right? There’s no change in hell he would have feelings for a girl he’s been best friends since they were five. 

It’d be weird, right? He shakes the thought out of his head and doesn’t respond — the front door opens and his eyes wander and so does Hope's. Landon almost forgot that Ethan has a key to the apartment. He walks in, completely shirtless, with gym shorts and tennis shoes. He’s sweating so much so he must’ve been on a run. Landon watched as Hope’s face lit up like a Christmas tree at the sight of him. 

He took his earphones out and smiled. “Hey gorgeous,” he said as he jogged over to her and met her for a kiss. Landon awkwardly sipped his coffee. Hope’s hands fell to his bare waist and then kissed him back. “I was on a morning run and thought I’d come here and bring you a good morning kiss,” he added, kissing her again. 

“So he gets to be shirtless and I don’t?” Landon joked. 

Ethan smirked and wrapped his arm around Hope’s shoulder, leaning against her. “You’ve got a hairy chest dude,” he said which makes Landon frown. “Kinda outta hand,” he added. 

Landon looked down at his chest underneath his t-shirt and frown. “I’m sorry I’m hairy person,” he whispered to himself. 

Ethan chuckled and he noticed that Hope was frowning as she stared at Landon. He doesn’t know what it is but he’s noticed the last couple of weeks, Hope’s been acting weird towards Landon — a guy who is supposed to be her best friend and that worries him so much. “Besides, Hope gets to see me shirtless and so much more whenever she wants,” Ethan said, causing Hope to blush as Ethan placed a lustful kiss on her lips which causes Landon to groan in disgust. 

“I don’t need to hear about your sexy time with someone who is basically my sister,” Landon said. 

Sister? Ouch. 

Hope chuckled. “And do you see his figure?” Hope asked, motioning to her boyfriend’s stomach before patting his stomach slightly. “Oh my god, you’re sweating,” she groaned in disgust as she pulled away quickly. 

“You’re not used to me being sweaty when it’s not from you, are you?” He whispered seductively. 

Landon’s eyes widened and backed away slightly. “Okay, that’s my cue,” he said as he grabbed his coffee cup. “I’ll see you guys at my show tonight, right?” He asked. Ethan nodded his head and so did Hope. “Cool, I’ve got new material I’ve been working on,” he smiled with happiness, before rushing up the stairs to get ready for the day. 

Hope watched her best friend ascend up the steps and her eyes didn’t leave him until her boyfriend trapped her between him in the sink. Her hands fall to his triceps and she looked him in the eye with a sad smile. “You’ve been distracted lately, you want to tell me what’s going on? Is it what I said last night?” Ethan asked. 

Hope smiled, rubbing her hands up and down his naked arms. “No, what you said last night actually made my day and week a lot better,” she whispered sweetly. “I’m just worried about Landon but what’s new right?” She chuckled. 

“Is Josie still being difficult?” Ethan asked. 

Hope huffed a laugh. “That’s a fucking understatement — she won’t even let him see Jack, which is fucking hypocritical of her because she said when they broke up that nothing was going to change when it comes to being that boy’s parents,” she added. 

“Can he just take her to court already?” Ethan asked. “I mean, this is getting out of hand, I bet Jack is so confused on why he can’t see his dad and Landon is too much of a good guy to say anything bad about Josie,” he added. 

“I’ve tried to tell him that but he refuses to take Jack away from his mom — probably because of what he went through as a kid with his mom but I can only ask him so many times you know? He doesn’t budge at all,” she added. 

Hope glanced over at the stairs again. “That little boy is awesome,” Ethan smiled. Hope nodded her head, thinking about how adorable Jack is. That little boy is like her own. She loves him so much. “Why don’t we have one?” He asked. 

Hope hummed in confusion as she looked back up at him. “We’ve already talked about that,” she said. 

“I know —,” he paused. “You’re not ready,” he said.

“It’s not that I’m not ready, E —,” Hope paused. “It’s just, we’re medical students who are in so much debt right now that we wouldn’t have the resources to take care of a baby,” 

“Or do you not want to have one with—me?” He asked slowly. There was a moment of hesitation with Hope but she didn’t want him to think she didn’t. 

Hope shook her head — putting her hands on the back of his neck, licking her lips. “You know, having a baby is a big step but what requires it to happen is the last step of the process,” she said, smirking. “Why don’t we start with the trying of the process?” She added before leaning in, kissing his lips softly, causing him to moan. 

Landon declines down the steps, stopping when Hope and Ethan come into view. His heart starts to tighten, and seeing them kiss and seeing them close brings this feeling out of him that he didn’t know he had. He could tell if he missed Josie or if he was jealous of Hope’s relationship with Ethan. Is it because he missed the relationship with Josie or is he jealous of Ethan? He didn’t know but he didn’t like it. 

He watched as Hope kissed Ethan with so much lust — did he want to kiss her? No, he thought about it and it just doesn’t feel right thinking about it. “Don’t mean time be the cock blocker but I’m heading out,” Landon said as he rushed down the stairs, avoiding eye contact. “I’ll see you guys tonight,” Landon said, grabbing his keys from the counter. 

Ethan gave him a wave. “Bye,” 

“Landon,” Hope called out. He turned towards her as she grabbed the doorknob. “I love you,” she smiled. 

Landon felt butterflies in the pit of his stomach — he gave her a small smile. “I love you too, ocean,” he smiled. Landon always called Hope ocean since they were little because her eyes were blue like the ocean. “Always and forever,” he added with a tight smile before leaving the apartment. 

When he got into his truck, he put his hands on his steering wheel and looked at the pictures on his dashboard. One of him and Jack when Jack was born and one of him and Hope when they were in high school. Why is he jealous? He pulled out his phone and dialed his brother Declan. “Sup bro,” Declan said, answering the phone in two seconds. 

“Can you get lunch?” Landon asked. 

* * *

“Thanks gorgeous,” Declan said as the waitress brings over their food and coffee — Declan checks out her ass as she walks away before drinking his coffee. Landon gives him a look and he shrugged. “What? She’s got a nice ass” He stated softly before digging into his food like a pig. “You’re paying for this right? Since you invited me?” He asked. 

Landon sighed and nodded his head. “Sure bro,” 

“So what’s up?” He asked with his mouthful. “How’s Little Jacky? I haven’t seen that booger in like years,” he asked. 

Landon cleared his throat. “He’s good,” he said. “Dude, you’re eating like you haven’t eaten in days,” he added. 

Declan chuckled. “Imma be honest with you bro, I’m fucking stoned right now,” he said with a laugh. Landon wasn’t surprised at all. He doesn’t care that his brother smokes — he just wouldn’t do it himself. “So how’s hopeful?” He asked. 

“That’s actually why I wanted to talk to you,” Landon asked. “I needed your advice on something?” He added. 

“Did y’all finally fuck?” Declan asked. 

Landon squinted in shock by his choice of words. “What? No!” He exclaimed. “We didn’t sleep together and we never will, okay so stop,” he added. Declan shrugged his shoulder and continued to stuff his face. “Her and Ethan are talking about having kids,” Landon mentioned. 

“Ethan Machado?” Declan questioned and Landon nodded his head. “Handsome dude,” he agreed. “Do you have a problem with your girl sexing it up with someone else?” 

“She’s not my girl,” Landon commented. “But I will be honest with you, I’m not the biggest fan of her having a family with him,” he whispered. Declan nodded his head, drinking his coffee in on sip. “I had a sex dream about her the other night,” Landon admitted. 

“Nice,” Declan smirked. 

“It’s not nice—,” Landon disagreed. “She’s like my sister bro,” he added with disgust in his voice. 

“Bro,” Declan chuckled. “That girl is not your sister — a girl that looks like Hope Mikaelson does, isn’t your sister. I’m honestly surprised you haven’t tapped her yet,” he added. 

Landon sighed deeply, running his hand through his hair. “I haven’t had any sexual thoughts about anyone other than Josie until that dream about Hope and it scares me you know? Josie was my first everything, my first kiss, my first girlfriend, my first time, man, she’s the mother of my kid,” he added with a chuckle. 

Declan pointed his fork at him. “But Hope — your best friend since diapers — has never turned her back on you. No matter what you do or who you associate yourself with,” he reminded him and Landon knew he was right. “Look, you know I didn’t like Josie for you but I couldn’t say anything because she made you happy and she gave you Jack, but Hope and you are destined to be together,” he whispered. 

“Best friends to lovers story is a little clique if you ask me,” Landon chuckled, rubbing his facial hair. 

Declan shrugged. “It always happens,” 

“It’s Hope, Dec. I shouldn’t be thinking of her like that,” 

“Do you think she’s ugly or something?” He asked. 

“Of course not,” Landon chuckled. “She’s fucking gorgeous but thinking about her more than — friends, it just gives me this feeling and it’s not—,” 

“You have to admit, bro,” Declan smirked. “That sex dream of the two of you — it’s a situation you want to become a reality,” he smirked, before reaching over and grabbing his bacon from his plate. “You gonna eat this?” He said stuffing the bacon in his mouth. “Thanks,” he added. 

* * *

Landon was setting up at the local club he plays at every Friday night and the crowd starts to gather in. 

He always gets nervous before a performance but this one is different because he’s performing a new song — a song he wrote about Josie and according to Jack (he called him earlier) mommy and penny are going out for a date night and they always comes here so Landon is going to be performing in front of the girl he wrote it for. 

He adjusted the microphone stand and his eyes land on the door when the girl he was just thinking about walks in, in a black dress, heels (he was always so upset when she wore heels because it made her taller than him) but Penelope doesn’t seem to mind because she’s much shorter. 

Josie always took Landon’s breath away. Her hair was perfectly curled and her dress fit her body perfectly. 

He stopped what he was doing and took a moment to take all of her in — he misses her but he’s having sex dreams about his best friend who he’s never considered like that. What the hell is wrong with him? 

Josie’s eyes wander and meet Landon’s — he stared back and she gives him a tight smile and he chuckled in disbelief before grabbing his microphone and placing it on the stand. 

“Dude, you ready?” Landon’s guitarist, Toby asked. 

Landon looked out in the crowd and his eyes landed on Josie and Penelope who are sitting at a table in the middle of the room, extremely close and then his eyes fall to the door, and his heart stopped. Hope walked in, a maroon dress, black heels and her hair in a bun (she always wears her hair up for some reason) she looked beautiful. 

He smiled. “Yeah, man, I’m ready,” he said. 

Josie’s eyes wander to the door and she sees Hope. She always hated how much Landon and Hope got along and always knew secretly that Hope was in love with Landon. That’s why she always hated them hanging out so much. 

She watched Landon give Hope a smile and then Hope waved at her as she grabbed the bicep of her “boyfriend.” She couldn’t help but roll her eyes. “Don’t let them get to you, babe,” Penelope said, leaning in. “We are out at our favorite bar because it’s date night,” she said.

Josie licked her lips. “I don’t trust her,” 

Penelope nodded her head, kissing her forehead. “I know,” 

Landon grabbed his guitar and put it over his shoulder before plugging it into the amp. He put his guitar pick in his mouth and then adjusted the volume of it before grabbing the pick and then putting his mouth to the microphone. “Hi everyone,” he greeted everyone. They all clapped. “My name is Landon Kirby, if you guys don’t know who I am, I'm 26 years old and I’ve been playing music for a while now,” he said, putting his hand to his chest. “I have a six year old son, Jack who is my personal judge when it comes to my music,” 

Everyone laughed and Hope glared intensely over at Josie who starred back. She rolled her eyes and looked back over Landon, smiling at his best friend. “I recently got out of an eight year relationship with my girlfriend, who is also the mother of my child,” he said and Josie shifted awkwardly. “I have nothing but respect for her as a person and a mother but when I’m in pain or I’m struggling, I turn to music so I wrote a song about our break up which will be on my next album which is coming out next year,” he said. 

“Oh no,” Hope whispered to herself. 

“This is called Breakeven,” Landon said stepping back from the microphone. The music started with Landon playing the guitar a little before the drums started. 

Landon knows that music is always going to be there for him and it’s never going to disappoint him. 

_ I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing _

_ Just prayin' to a god that I don't believe in _

_ 'Cause I got time while she got freedom _

_ 'Cause when a heart breaks no it don't break even _

_ Her best days will be some of my worst _

_ She finally met a girl that's gonna put her first _

_ While I'm wide awake she's no trouble sleeping _

_ 'Cause when a heart breaks no it don't break even, even, no _

He started to bounce the best. 

Josie’s jaw tightened. 

_ What am I supposed to do when the best part of me was always you and what am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're OK _

_ I'm falling to pieces, yeah _

_ I'm falling to pieces _

The music dies down. Penelope grabbed Josie’s hand, giving it a squeeze. 

_ They say bad things happen for a reason _

_ But no wise words gonna stop the bleeding _

_ 'Cause she's moved on while I'm still grieving _

_ And when a heart breaks no it don't breakeven even, no _

_ What am I gonna to do when the best part of me was always you and what am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're OK _

_ I'm falling to pieces, yeah _

_ I'm falling to pieces, yeah _

_ I'm falling to pieces _

_ I'm falling to pieces _

_ Oh you got his heart and my heart and none of the pain _

_ You took your suitcase, I took the blame _

_ Now I'm try'na make sense of what little remains ooh _

_ 'Cause you left me with no love and no love to my name _

_ I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing _

_ Just prayed to a god that I don't believe in _

_ 'Cause I got time while she got freedom _

_ 'Cause when a heart breaks no it don't break _

_ No it don't break _

_ No it don't breakeven no _

_ What am I gonna do when the best part of me was always you and what am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're OK.  _

The music stops completely and Landon opens his eyes and the crowd is clapping their hands — Hope stood there, cheer long loudly and clapping and Landon’s eyes land on Josie who is seated with watery eyes. Landon knows that she never wanted to hurt him but it doesn’t mean she didn’t. 

“Thank you,” Landon said into the microphone. 

After the show, Landon began shaking hands and giving people hugs before he was approached by his ex. Josie stood in front of him with a straight smile. He stared her down before stuffing his hands in his pockets. He glared at Penelope and she licked her lips. “I see you guys are comfortable enough to show up here of all places,” he said. 

“This was our place once too, Landon,” Josie said. 

“Yeah, because of me,” Landon responded. “What the hell are you doing here?” He asked next, rudely. 

“We’re on a date,” Penelope said. 

Josie closed her eyes and sighed — Landon glanced over at her, huffing in response. “Cutting herself into a conversation that doesn't concern you, again,” he said. 

“When are you going to stop being petty?” Penelope asked. 

“When the memory of you fucking my girlfriend behind my back is out of my head,” he said and that made Penelope flinch. He didn’t want to sound harsh but he did. “Like I said, Park. Not everything involving the mother of my child concerns you so fuck off,” he said roughly. 

“Landon,” Josie whispered. 

“Where’s our son?” Landon asked her. 

She sighed. “He’s with Rose,” she stared. 

“He invited me to the baseball game this weekend, you know the one that you didn’t tell me about,” Landon mentioned. 

Josie nodded her head, swallowing. “That’s fine,” 

“I wanna have him this weekend,” Landon said. 

“He’s got plans with—,” 

“He’s my son, Josie. I don’t want to call my lawyer but I will if you don’t me see him more, you don't have the right to—,” 

“Lan,” Landon felt someone touch his arm causally. He turned and was going to snap but it was Hope so his anger settled. He smiled softly and gave her a kiss on the cheek before hugging her and then dabbing up Ethan. “Oh look, it’s satan,” Hope said, smiling at Josie. “And her mistress,” 

Josie gave her a fake smile. “I’ve got to go help clean up but I’ll see you back at that apartment,” Landon said to Hope before looking back at Josie. “Try not to fuck while my son is in the house, please,” he said before leaving. 

Penelope chuckled in disbelief as she nodded her head. She really does miss her friend but she fucked it up and she knows that more than ever but she loves Josie. “You going to let him see his son?” Hope asked Josie. 

“It’s none of your business,” Josie responded. 

“It is when I see him cry countless times because he can’t hold his son or tuck him into bed,” Hope said, crossing her arms over her chest. “Landon did nothing wrong, he doesn’t deserve the hate and torture you’re giving him,” 

“He can’t be mad at me for being gay, Hope and breaking up with him because I wasn’t happy,” she said. 

Hope nodded her head. “Yeah you’re right but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have the right to be heartbroken,” she said and that shut Josie up. Hope walked passed her, hitting her shoulder roughly, causing her to stumble. “Oh and Josie,” she turned towards Hope. “Jack keeps asking why he can’t see his daddy when he wants but Penelope can,” she said. “Sound familiar?” She said, smiling. 

Josie’s jaw tightened. 

“Bye,” she winked and then left. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> remember 10 comments (from different people) and I’ll post the next chapter two days after the comments reach the goal.


	3. a place (we used to know)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Landon and Hope have a emotional talk

Landon laid awake in his bed in the middle of the night — all he heard was the sound of Ethan and Hope talking down stairs. The apartment isn’t very sound proof so he can pretty much hear everything and that’s sometimes not the best. 

The sound of Hope’s laughter is soothing to Landon. There is something about Hope and their friendship that makes Landon more happy than he has ever expected. 

Hope is his best friend and as always been that person he could turn to when he was in trouble or when he needed someone to talk to but he’s noticed since she started dating Ethan, things changed drastically. It’s like she doesn’t have time for him anymore and that really breaks his heart. 

He has a feeling that’s she has been ignoring him for some reason. It's like he did something wrong and he needs to figure it out somehow. Living without Hope is hard for him because it’s all he’s known for a while. 

It always amazed Landon how perfect Hope is with everything. She’s smart, perfect and just all out amazing with anything and everything. She knows how to take care of people besides herself. That’s what he loves about her. 

Landon pushes his covers off his body and then sat up, letting his feet it the hard wood floor. He gripped the mattress beside him and glanced over at his nightstand — glancing at the picture that is there. He smiled softly at it but then realized that it wasn’t his reality anymore. 

Josie and Jack in the same picture sitting there — he stared at the smile on Josie’s face and couldn’t help but frown. She’s not his girl anymore. Landon reached over and grabbed the frame and looked down at it on his lap. He put his finger on Josie’s face and took a deep breath in and released before putting it down on the nightstand, picture down and then looked over at his dresser and sees himself in the mirror — he hates the person he’s become. 

His eyes land on the small Polaroid taped to the mirror and he smiled. He’s had that picture for as long as he can remember and he’s never going to get rid of it. Hope’s laughter filled his ears again and he smiled. He looked down at his chest and noticed that he did indeed have a hairy chest. He stood up off the bed and made his way to the bathroom and turned the water on. 

He took his boxers off and stepped in under the burning hot water and washed all over his body before grabbing his razor and looking down at his chest. He doesn’t know why Hope has this kind of impact on him she does so here it goes. He started to shave the chest easily. 

After getting out of the shower, he looked at his red chest in the mirror and it’s like he didn’t even recognize himself but he didn’t hate it at all either. He dried himself off and then put a pair of boxers on and a pair of baseball shorts before making his way downstairs slowly. The lights were off and the sound of the television, Hope’s laughter and kisses filled his ears but he didn’t care. 

He hit the bottom of the steps with a loud noise and he noticed the position that Ethan and Hope were in and blushed slightly — he continued on his way to the kitchen as Hope turned her head and pushed Ethan off of her. Landon turned the kitchen light on and then grabbed a Gatorade from the refrigerator. “What happened to your chest?” Hope asked him as she sat up fully, fixing her shirt. 

Landon shrugged his shoulders as he took a sip of his drink. “I’ve realized over the last couple of months that I’m not the person I used to be and maybe it’s time for a change, not just emotionally or mentally but physically too,” he said. “And what does it matter? I thought you hated my chest hair?” He asked kind of rudely. 

Hope was taken aback by his attitude. “What crawled up your ass?” Hope chuckled slightly. 

Landon shrugged. “I guess I’m just tired of people judging me, that’s all,” he commented back. 

He would be like this one day and then all best friends with her. Hope is getting tired of it. “You need to watch your tude with me, Landon Scott,” she said, standing up and crossing her arms over her chest — Landon stared at her with a straight smile, he always hated his middle name. “I haven’t done anything wrong to you,” she said. 

Landon eyed her and then eyed Ethan who stands up — and also doesn’t have a shirt on and his pants are unzipped. Something dropped in his stomach and it’s like he wasn’t able to control what he said. “Besides flaunting your perfect relationship every chance you get,” Landon hissed. 

“I don’t do that,” Hope defended herself. 

“Do what?” Landon asked. 

“Act like a dick because of what happened with Josie tonight,” she said, stepping towards him. “I get it okay, you’re going through a fucking hard time right now with not seeing Jack all the time and Josie breaking your heart but don’t take it out on me,” she said strongly. 

“Don’t you think you might deserve it?” Landon asked. 

“Why? Because I have a boyfriend and you’re lonely for the first time in eight years? Well I hate to be the barrel of bad news, Landon but not everyone needs to be happy at the exact moment you are,” she fought back. 

Landon’s mouth twitched and he glanced over at Ethan who just sat there with his elbows on his knees and his hands on his face — not saying anything. “Don’t fuck on the couch, it’s not stained proof,” he said before grabbing the Gatorade and then walking passed Hope without any word.

After he reached the top of the steps and Hope heard his door slam shut, she turned towards her boyfriend. “Is he always like that?” Ethan asked softly. 

Hope rolled her eyes before walking over and straddling him, putting her hands on the back of his neck. “It happens one day and then it happens the next, I don’t know what to do. Josie really did a number on him,” she whispered. 

“He shouldn’t be taking it out on you, babe,” he said. 

Hope nodded her head and whispered, “I know,” before licking her lips and sighing deeply. “You know, I always make sure to check up on him before he goes to sleep because I’m afraid he’s going to hurt himself,” she admitted. 

“I don’t think he would do that,” Ethan disagreed. “He wouldn’t leave Jack without a father,” he added. 

Hope nodded her head, frowning sadly. “Maybe you’re right,” she whispered before looking back at the staircase. 

Ethan put his hand on her chin and turned her towards him. “He is capable of taking care of himself — don’t let anything he said to you tonight get to you okay?” He said and Hope nodded her head. “Now kiss me,” he smiled and Hope chuckled as she leaned in and kissed him strongly. 

* * *

_ The feeling of her hands all of his body is giving him this utter burning sensation that he can’t help but moan at. It’s like a new feeling that he never felt with Josie before. It’s spectacular and he couldn’t help but smile against her lips when her hand dipped into his hands, grabbing his rock.  _

_ “Are you sure you want to do this?” Landon asked, between kisses as she grabbed his jacket and pulled it off.  _

_ She nodded her head. “I’m sure,” she said, taking his belt off and then unzipping his pants. “Now do you prefer the BJ before or after the fun part?” She asked.  _

_ Landon moaned when he felt the palm of her hand grabbing his dick through the fabric of his pants. “This could change a lot of stuff between us,” he said, as she pecked his lips.  _

_ “Don’t tell me you haven’t thought about it before,” she smirked, grabbing his pants and pulling them down.  _

_ “No, no, I definitely have but—,” she grabbed his underpants and pulled them down before getting on her knees. “I just don’t want this to ruin our friendship,” he moaned as she kissed his stomach and made her way down. “I’m serious, I don’t want this to affect us,” he said.  _

_ She stood up a little and put her hand on the back of his head, kissing his lips softly. “I’ve been waiting to fuck you since high school, Landon Kirby, so shut the fuck up and do so,”  _

_ Landon moaned as she made her way down again. “Hope,”  _

“Landon!” Landon jumped up from his dream and it was so scared by the voice, he fell out of his bed, landing straight on his stomach, grunting in pain. He definitely has a boner. He turned into his back slowly and shifted uncomfortably. “What the hell are you screaming about?” He heard Hope’s voice from above him. He grabbed a pillow that fell with him and covered his bulge in his pants. 

“Why are you yelling?” Landon asked. 

Hope looked dressed and ready for the day. “You need to get up and shower — Jack’s game is in an hour and a half and if you don’t show up, you’ll be hearing it from Josie and I don’t feel like dealing with her,” she said. 

Landon groaned. “Right okay. Can you leave so I can stand up?” He asked kindly. 

“Right,” Hope chuckled as she headed towards the door. “It’s not like I haven’t seen a dick before,” she said softly.

“You haven’t seen mine before,” Landon said. 

“Yes I have, I've literally had to change you remember?” Landon cringed at the memory. He got super drunk one night and Hope had to carry him upstairs, take his clothes off and help him shower before putting him to bed. She saw him naked then but it didn’t matter because they’re friends. “And by the way, I still don’t forgive you for being an asshole to me last night. It was uncalled for you,” she added. 

He gave her a weak smile and a thumbs up. “Noted,” he said and then he heard his door slam shut before he groaned in frustration. Why is he having sex dreams about Hope Mikaelson? His best friend since diapers? He doesn’t know but he needs to find a way to stop it before he wants to do it for real because then, he’ll be even more heartbroken. 

* * *

Landon parked his truck and looked at the empty seat next to him. Hope usually rides with him to events like this but she decided to ride with Ethan. He hopped out of the car and Ethan’s small SUV pulled up and he quickly parked it and then opened the door for Hope. Landon didn’t even notice what she was wearing today. Her hair is up in a high ponytail like it always is, tight jeans and a jean jacket. He doesn’t know why but his dick twisted in his pants. 

He’s gotta stop thinking about her like that. 

But he keeps having those damn dreams and it makes it hard for him to focus on her without wanting to for fill those dreams — but also when he thinks about it, it grosses him out because she’s like a sister to him. Ethan and Hope give each other a kiss before grabbing hands — Landon puts his baseball cap on, backwards, before shutting the door to his truck and heading towards the field. “He’s still acting like a dick?” Ethan whispered to Hope. 

Hope shrugged her shoulders. “What’s new?” 

Landon couldn’t contain his excitement. He gets to see his son today and everything in his life will be better. He even gets to bring him home tonight. Josie texted earlier and said that her and Penelope could use a weekend to themselves (not the most ideal text to receive from the love of your life) but he didn’t care because he gets to have his son. 

“Daddy!” He heard and his face lit up when he saw his small, brown haired, hazel eyed six year old boy rushing over to him. A smile grew on his face as Jack dropped everything in his hands and rushed over to him. 

“Hey buddy,” Landon said as Jack’s body collided with his, he groaned as he lifted him up into his arms, hugging him tightly. “Oh my goodness, you’ve gotten so big,” Landon said, putting a hand on the back of his head. 

“He’s a good dad,” Penelope mentioned as Josie stood there and watched her son hug his father. “You knew that the moment you found out you were pregnant,” she added. 

Josie sighed. “I know,” 

Landon bent down and put Jack’s feet to the ground before placing a knee on the ground. “You’ve gotten so tall,” Landon said, looking at how big his son has gotten. “I told you weren’t allowed to grow up, you little squirt!” He jokes as he played with Jack’s hair which made him giggle. 

“It must be all the milk that mommy gives me,” Jack giggled. 

Landon laughed and agreed. “It must be that,” he said as he fixed Jack’s baseball hat since it was covering his eyes. “Did mommy tell you that you’re going to be staying with me and Auntie Hope tonight and tomorrow?” He asked him. 

Jack’s face lit up and he started to nod his head. “Yeah. I packed my own clothes and everything. I brought that dinosaur sweatshirt that you like,” he said. 

“You did? Perfect,” Landon said. 

“Where’s my favorite godson?” Hope’s voice chimes in. 

“Auntie Hope!” Jack squealed as he pushed passed Landon and ran into her arms. Hope grunted as she picked him up. He gave her a hug before she placed him down. “I’m so happy you could come Auntie Hope,” he said before turning towards Ethan. “You too, uncle Ethan,” he said. 

Ethan played with his hair as he smiled at him. Hope bent down and grabbed Jack’s face and scanned it. “What the hell happened to you? Dude, you’re like forty,” she said. 

Jack laughed. “I’m six, Auntie Hope,” 

Hope pretended to make a face like she didn’t believe him. “Whatever you say,” she grumbled. “I bet you’re a spy “ 

“I’m not a spy,” Jack laughed. 

She squinted her eyes at him. “We’ll see,” she said seriously before smirking and kissing his forehead. Landon loves watching Hope interact with Jack. It’s incredible to watch. Hope didn’t grow up with any siblings and she’s still amazing with kids. That’s why he wanted her to be his godmother. “I got you a present,” Hope said to Jack. 

Jack’s face lit up. “I like it when you bring me presents,” he said jumping up and down rapidly. 

Hope rolled his eyes. “You are your father’s child,” she joked which made Landon chuckle as he watched Hope pull a bag of quarters from her purse — Jack’s face lit up once again. “I heard you were collecting quarters and Auntie Hope happens to hate coins,” she leaned in. “They make your hands smell,” she whispered which caused Jack to laugh. “Knock yourself out kid,” she handed him the back. 

He grabbed it happily. “Thank you auntie Hope,” he hugged her. “I love you!” He squeaked. 

“I love you too, buddy,” Hope said, rubbing her hand up and down his back. “What do we always say?” She asked as they pulled away from the hug and held her pinkie out. 

Jack laced his pinkie with hers. “Family is always and forever,” Landon smiled at that. 

“That’s right,” she smiled. “Now go play some baseball,” Jack gave her a kiss on the cheek before rushing over to his mom. Landon looked over at Hope and gave her a smile and mouth, “thank you,” and she gave him a smile back. 

Jack rushed over to Josie holding the bag out. “Mommy look what auntie Hope gave me! I can add it to my collection at home!” He said jumping up and down. 

Josie chuckled, looking at the bag. “I see that, baby. Now go give your stuff to daddy so he can put it in his car and then go and warm up for the game,” she said, handing Jack his bag before motioning towards Landon. 

Jack grabbed it and rushed over to Landon as Landon squats down and had to stop his son from running — he’s got a lot of energy doesn’t it. “Here’s my bag for this weekend, daddy,” he said with a huge smile on his face. 

“Thank you buddy,” he chuckled as he grabbed the bag. “Go with your team, I’ll make sure to put this in the car,” he said and Jack nodded his head before rushing over to his team as Landon stood up and Josie made her way over to him. 

Josie held out a small plastic bag and Landon looked down at it. “He’s got a small ear infection from swimming in the pool the other weekend,” she said as Landon grabbed the bag. “He needs two drops in each ear before he goes to bed and in the morning,” she added causally. 

Landon nodded his head. “Okay, do you need any money to help pay for the medication?” He asked kindly. 

Josie shook her head. “I took care of it,” she said. “But I will need your help with Christmas this year and his birthday,” she said. Landon nodded his head. “He wants a baseball themed party and I just don’t have the money—,” 

“Consider it done,” Landon cut her off. 

Josie nodded her head softly. “Thank you,” 

There was a moment of silence between them — Landon looked behind Josie and Penelope stood there with a straight face and her hands in her leather jacket. His heart broke again. He just sees them kissing in his mind. Yes, he was the one who walked in on them making out. He hurt more than words can describe. “I’m going to go put this in my truck,” Landon whispered as he teared up. 

Josie even heard the crack in his voice and even though she doesn’t love him like that anymore, she still loves him and she hates that she hurt him. Josie looked over at Hope and Ethan. “So you guys are official now?” She asked. 

Hope rolled her eyes. “Yeah, we have been for almost a year now — but of course you were too busy fucking Penelope to notice,” she said as she grabbed Ethan’s hand and pushed passed her, pushing her shoulder. 

“You know you should be happy,” Josie said, causing Hope to stop and turn towards her. “I mean, since Landon and I aren’t together anymore, you’ve got an open window,” she added, with a smirk on her lips. 

Hope’s face reddened— she made the mistake of telling Josie about his crush on Landon one day when she was drunk and Josie hasn’t been able to let it go. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she whispered. 

“Really? So you’re not in love with him anymore?” She asked. Hope’s has tightened and Ethan looked down at her, with a confused expression. “It’s only been two years since you told me you did, two years enough?” She asked. 

Hope swallowed and just pulled Ethan along, not responding to her. “What was that about?” He asked her. 

Hope shook her head. “Nothing,” 

* * *

Landon closed the door to his bedroom after putting Jack down to sleep and made his way downstairs since it’s only 9:30 and he’s in the mood for some ice cream. 

When he made it downstairs, Hope was in the kitchen making a cup of what seems to be coffee, she is always drinking coffee. He knows he was a dick last night but it’s like sometimes he can’t control it really. 

He’s been going through a hard time the last few months and he’s felt like he’s been losing her to Ethan. 

Hope went to take a sip of her coffee when she noticed him. “Is he asleep? She asked before taking a sip of her coffee and Landon made his way over to her and nodded his head. “That’s good,” she added. 

“Ethan’s not staying the night?” Landon asked as he reached into the freezer and grabbed the tube of ice cream. 

Hope shook her head and leaned her back against the counter. “He’s got breakfast with his mom and sister tomorrow morning, he didn’t want to get distracted from his sleep,” she said. Landon opened the ice cream and nodded his head without saying another word. “Did I do something wrong, Lan?” Hope asked. 

Landon squinted his eyes at her. “No,” he said. 

“Are you sure?” Hope asked. Landon nodded his head. “Because you’ve barely said one word to me since we got home and when we got ice cream, you barely looked at me,” she said. 

Landon shrugged his shoulders. “It’s nothing,” 

Hope felt herself tearing up. “Obviously it’s something, Landon so tell me,” 

Landon chuckled. “I’m serious, Hope. It’s not--,” 

“It’s because of Ethan and I isn’t it?” She asked and that’s when Landon stopped talking. “Is that what this hatred is about?” Hope asked next. 

Landon took a deep breath in and released before putting the ice cream down and stepping towards her. Hope felt her breath hitch her throat. “I’ve been experiencing something ever since Josie and I broke up,” he whispered. Hope scanned his eyes. “About you,” he said and that’s when Hope raised an eyebrow. 

“What do you mean?” She whispered. 

Landon blushed before awkwardly licking his lips. “I’ve been having these dreams,” he whispered, not making eye contact. “You’re in them,” he added. 

“Okay,” she whispered. 

“And you may or may not always be, um,” he paused, shifting awkwardly. Hope is blushing so hard right now. “Naked,” he added almost so softly that she couldn’t even hear. “And we--we uh, we always,” he swallowed. Hope nodded her head. “And it’s been scaring me because I shouldn’t be thinking about these kinds of things with you,” he added. 

Hope was so shocked she didn’t know what to say. “So I pushed you away and I’m sorry because I thought it would make the dreams go away but they get more and more intense because not talking you makes me think about you a lot and I don’t know, it freaks me out,” he added. 

“Is the thought of seeing me that way really that weird to you?” Hope whispered. 

Landon looked into his eyes. “Honestly,” he whispered. “It creeps me out,” he added. Hope looked totally hurt by that and Landon saw it. He knew he hurt her and that what he had just said would change things between them. His eyes softened and he took a step forward. “Hope I didn’t mean--,” 

“No I get it,” she cried softly, stopping him from stepping any closer. “It disgusts you to even think about me other than your best friend who is like a sister,” she fought back. Landon’s taken back by her words. Why is she so effect by this? “Gosh, I had a little bit of hope that you weren’t going to fuck our friendship up anymore and here I am, wrong once again,” she said as she pushed passed him and walked over to the front door. 

“Hope,” Landon called after her. 

Hope grabbed her jacket and keys. “Fuck you,” she said before leaving and slamming the door shut. 

Landon took a deep breath in and released before running his hands through his hair. Why did she care so much? And then it came to his mind -- his eyes widened and his eyes softened. He pulled out his phone and texted someone. 

**LANDON:** Who was the guy that was the reason behind you and Hope’s break up?

**LIZZIE:** You want me to be honest? 

**LANDON:** Yes. 

**LIZZIE:** You. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You know the deal. 10 comments and I'll post two days after.


	4. (i know I’m gonna fall) down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Landon and Lizzie talk about Hope and Josie and Landon finally get closure.

Landon dialed Lizzie’s number and sat down on the couch, shaking his leg furiously. Hope never told him. Why didn’t Hope tell him about this? They were supposed to trust each other with everything and anything. He never would’ve said what he just said to her if he knew about this. “ _ Sup Hobbit,”  _ Lizzie greeted him when she answered the phone. 

Landon sat up straight. “Did she really have feelings for me?” He asked her straight up. 

Lizzie chuckled. “ _ Yeah, and don’t say it as if it’s past tense. She totally still has the hots for you, despite her being with that nerd with the weird styled hair _ ,” she added. 

**“** Really?” Landon whispered sadly. 

Lizzie groaned. _“You both are so fucking frustrating,”_ she mumbled under her breath before taking a deep breath in and releasing. “ _Yes, she did and still probably does have feelings for you._ _I thought it was pretty obvious when all she does it what makes you happy_ ,” she added carefully 

Landon let out a frustrated sigh, not directed at anyone but himself as he ran his hand down his face. “Why didn’t she tell me?” He whispered softly. 

“ _ Isn’t it obvious? _ ” Lizzie asked. 

Landon huffed. “Obviously not.” 

“ _ I swear, I’ve been telling her for years to just tell you but she was set on just trying to get over it. At first she thought it was a silly crush and she would get over it but then one night she came to a realization that she loves you as in IN love with you. It was pretty romantic if you ask me _ ,” Lizzie stated.

“When did she come to a realization?” Landon asked. 

Lizzie denied. “ _ THAT'S not my place,”  _

Landon groaned. “Since when do you keep secrets or your mouth shut for that instance? Tell me,” he said. 

She let out a sigh before groaning again.  _ “She said it was at Raf’s party when you beat up that jerk who pinched her ass,”  _ she said and Landon nodded his head.  _ “But I think it’s when you told her that Josie was pregnant,”  _ she said. 

Landon’s eyes softened and his heart stopped. She was hurt by that and she didn’t say anything? No wonder her and Josie don’t get along very well. “Why?” He asked. 

_ “I’ve said too much, Landon,”  _ she said. 

“Lizzie please?” 

Lizzie sighed.  _ “She’s going to murder me,”  _ she mumbled. _ “She told me the other day that it was because she hated the fact that it wasn’t her,”  _ she said and that’s when Landon’s heart stopped.  _ “Basically she wished it was her you were having a baby with and not my sister,”  _ she added. 

Landon couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He’s been having these dreams about being intimate with her and this entire time — she’s had actual feelings for him. “I fucked it up, Lizzie. I fucked it up big time,” he said, freaking out. 

Lizzie groaned. “ _ What the hell did you do? _ ” 

Landon pulled his hair, his lips trembling. “I’ve been having dreams about us, Hope and I, and I might have told her that it’s been freaking me out and I’ve been ignoring her because of it and she didn’t exactly take it well,” he said. 

“ _ Dreams? You mean sex dreams?”  _ Lizzie asked.

Landon let out a large sigh.  _ “ _ It never end up being like that but we kiss and she is always tearing my clothes off in them,” he explained. 

_ “Why the hell would that creep you out? Hope is fucking beautiful, incredible in bed if I may add and anyone on this fucking planet would be lucky to be with her like that, I sure as hell was,”  _ she stated. 

Landon groaned and stood up, getting frustrated at himself. “I know she’s fucking gorgeous okay, I live with her but she’s always been my best friend, Lizzie. I’ve never thought of her more than that and that’s why this is freaking me out. It wouldn’t work between us, right?” He asked. 

_ “Landon, you’ve spent the last eight years with the same girl — you might say that you’ve never seen Hope as someone more than that but it’s not because you don’t see it, it’s because you’ve been too blinded by something else to see it  _ she stated and Landon for some reason, felt like she was right. And he hated feeling like that. 

“What do you mean?” Landon whispered. 

_ “Hope has been in love with you since the 10th grade,”  _ Lizzie reminded him.  _ “You started dating Josie the 11th grade,”  _ he added and Landon knew where she was going with this. “ _ She has always been afraid that if she told you. It would ruin the friendship you two have and she rather be friends with you then not have you at all,”  _ she explained. 

Landon rolled his eyes in annoyance. “What makes her think I didn’t want her then?” Landon asked. 

“ _ You always talked about how much you wanted to go out Jo and how much you would kill to make her your girlfriend and you always talked about it with Hope and don’t get me wrong, I get it, she’s your best friend and you two talk about everything but think about how she must’ve felt.”  _ Lizzie said. 

Landon sighed and sat back down on the couch, leaning his head in his hands. “Did she talk to you about it?” He asked. 

_ “We talk about you everyday, hobbit,”  _ Lizzie admitted.  _ “And she might be with Ethan and she might love him but the love she has for him would never fucking compare to the love that she has for you, Landon Kirby,”  _ she added. 

Landon took a deep breath in. “I’ve never seen her like that before, Lizzie and I don’t want to hurt her feelings anymore than I already have,” he whispered. 

_ “I’m not stupid, Landon,”  _ Lizzie stated.  _ “I know you’ve been acting like a dick to her and there’s obviously a reason for it and you can say that it’s because having those sex dreams about her freaked you out but I think it’s because all you’ve known is Josie, I mean, the girl was all your firsts and I know that because she’s my sister and you were all hers too,”  _ Lizzie stated. “ _ But Hope was your first,”  _ Lizzie stated. 

Landon squinted his eyes. “What do you mean she was my first? Josie was all my first,” he reminded her. 

Lizzie chuckled, let out a huff in annoyance.  _ “She was the first girl you decided to love after your mom,”  _ she said and that’s shut Landon up. “ _ Look, Hobbit. You might’ve not seen Hope in a romantic way from the beginning but it was always going to happen at some point and whether you guys decide to act on the sexual tension or to push it down,”  _ she paused. “ _ You need to know that it’s not going anywhere,”  _ she added. Landon sighed.  _ “And neither is Hope because she loves you, it’s a love that consumes her. She will literally do anything and everything to make sure you’re happy,”  _ she said. 

“When are you coming back to the states?” He asked. 

_ “Tomorrow night,”  _ she said.  _ “For Josie and Penelope’s engagement party,”  _ she added and that’s when Landon’s heart dropped and his eyes softened and Lizzie took that silence on the other side of the phone seriously.  _ “Oh no please tell me you knew,”  _ she begged. 

Landon’s lip clinched. “I gotta go,” he said. 

_ “Land—,”  _ but landon hung the phone up and then threw it on the chair across from him before running his hands through his hair roughly. He’s gotta deal with this shit with Hope and now he’s gotta go around knowing that the girl he loved, three months ago and still loves is getting married after being with the girl for only six months. 

“Daddy,” Landon stood up quickly and turned towards the steps. Jack stood there holding his teddy bear tightly. “My tummy hurts,” he said. 

“Okay, buddy. I’m coming,” he said as he rushed over and grabbing his phone before turning the lights off. He rushed up the steps and lifted him up in his arms. “You’re burning up, kiddo,” he said as concern filled his face. 

Jack rested his head on his shoulder. “I don’t feel good, daddy,” he said, slightly crying. 

Landon stayed up all night with Jack — he threw up a few times and hasn’t been able to stop crying. He’s starting to get worried. “My tummy hurts, daddy,” Jack cried. 

Landon sighed, nodding his head as rubbed his head. “I know buddy, I know, let me call mommy and we will take you to see a doctor okay, they will make you feel better,” he said and Jack just cried and held his stomach in response. Landon took a deep breath in and reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone before dialing Josie. 

It’s 4 o’clock in the morning. She won’t answer right? She might knowing that Jack is with him. He put the phone to his ear and continued to rub Jack’s head. It rang and rang and rang and Landon was anxiously waiting for her to answer and he almost hung up but then Josie’s tired voice chimed in. “ _ Landon? What’s wrong? _ ” She sounded upset. 

“Hey, I’m sorry for calling you so early,” Landon said, looking at his sick son. “I’ve been up all night with him, Jo. He’s been complaining about a stomach ache and he’s thrown up a few times. He’s burning up, I’m gonna have to take him to the emergency room,” he said. 

“ _ Does he have a fever? _ ” Josie asked, Landon could hear her shuffling around for something. 

Landon put his hand to Jack’s forehead. “I don’t know. I don’t have a thermometer — I know it’s something that I should have but I don’t,” he said, freaking out. 

“ _ Um, okay, _ ” Josie thought for a second. “ _ Can you get Hope to look at him? She’s going to school for that stuff isn’t she? _ ” Josie asked and that’s when Landon didn’t respond. Why does this stuff always happen to him? He doesn’t know but he hates it. “ _ Landon? _ ” Josie called out. 

Landon sighed deeply. “Hope isn’t here,” he said. “We had an argument that led to her leaving the apartment without telling me where she was going, so I can’t ask Hope to look at him.” Landon said kind of harshly. 

“ _ Landon, he’s going to be fine,”  _ Josie said, trying to calm his nerves.  _ “Don’t freak out on him, it will just make him even more scared,”  _ she said. 

“Daddy, I don’t feel good,” Jack said. 

Landon quickly grabbed the trash can right before Jack leaned over the bed and threw up. “Jo, I’m taking him to the emergency room. This is like the fifth time he’s thrown up,” Landon said, placing the trash can down and rushing over to his son’s bag and grabbing his jacket. 

“Mommy,” Jack cried out. 

Landon put the phone on speaker. “ _ I’m right here, baby,”  _ Josie said and Jack cried even more. 

“My tummy hurts,” He cried. 

_ “Daddy’s going to take you go see the doctor okay? I’m on my way and I’ll see you when I get there,”  _ Josie sighed sadly.  _ “Lan, text me when you get there please,”  _ she said and then there was a moment of silence.  _ “And is everything okay with you and Hope?”  _ She whispered. 

“Far from it,” he said as he lifted his sick son up in his arms and then hung the phone up. 

* * *

Landon arrived to the emergency room and the doctors and nurses quickly attended to Jack — apparently his appendix ruptured and he needs surgery right away so Landon signed off on what he needed to sign off on and they took Jack to the OR to get everything fixed and now Landon’s sitting in the waiting room, sleeping in a very uncomfortable position which he probably will regret in the morning. “Landon,” he slowly wakes up and looked up and saw Josie standing there. What the hell took her so long to get here? 

Landon groaned friendly as he sat up straight and looked around and noticed where he was. “Oh my god,” he pressed his hand to his forehead. “What time is it?” He asked. 

“Six,” Josie sat herself down next to him before handing him a cup of coffee. Landon looked down at it. “Flat white,” she responded and he smiled. She remembered his face of ire coffee drink, the one from high school. “Is he okay?” She asked him, really worried for her son. 

Landon yawned, covering his mouth with his fist before rubbing his face. “It was his appendix,” he said. Josie sighed in relief. “He’s going to be okay,” he whispered next. 

Josie leaned her head back against the wall before drinking a sip of her coffee. Landon glanced over at her and stared for a little bit. Josie is beautiful and Landon was lucky enough to have been with her for as long as he was but there’s obviously something going on with Hope or well, what he is feeling for Hope that he needs to figure it out. “I I-uh—I talked to your sister yesterday,” Landon said. 

Josie turned her head and looked at him with confused eyes. “Why did you talk to my sister? You two hated each other,” she stated. 

Landon chuckled, scratching the back of his head. “I never hated your sister, your sister hated that I was the guy you chose to start a family with,” he said. 

Josie rolled her eyes and leaned her head back against the wall. “Yeah well that wasn’t her choice,” she mumbled before taking another sip of her coffee. 

He nodded his head before taking a sip of his and it burnt him slightly. “Congratulations,” he whispered and she looked over at him confused. “To you and Penelope,” he added. Josie’s mouth parted slightly and panic filled her face. “It’s okay,” Landon said, nodding his head. “I get it, she’s your one epic love and who the hell am I to step in the middle of that?” He asked, more to himself than anything. 

Josie sighed deeply. “I’m guessing it was my sister who told you because I haven’t even told Jack yet,” she said. Landon nodded his head, sipping his coffee again. Josie glanced over at him and shut her eyes before sighing. “I was going to tell you first, Landon,” she whispered. 

Landon shrugged his shoulders and put his hands in her sweatshirt pockets casually. “It doesn’t matter, Jo.” He said. 

Josie nodded her head. “It does, you’re my son’s father. You have the right to know who’s going to be in his life,” she said. “Even if it’s just Penelope,” she added. 

“The fact that it’s Penelope makes it even harder to know, Josie,” he said honestly. 

Josie chuckled softly and nodded her head. “I never meant to hurt you, Landon,” she whispered — Landon just continued to look down at his lap, his leg was shaking like crazy and he doesn’t know how to stop it. Josie felt herself tearing up. “I’ve known for a while,” she whispered next and that’s when Landon raised an eyebrow and looked over at her. “Even before Penelope, and before you say anything — I never cheated on you before Penelope but I was going through a hard time dealing with my sexuality,” she said. 

Landon’s eyes began to water but he didn’t let anything fall. He couldn’t let it. Josie could barely look over at him. “She was just — an awakening for me,” she said honestly. He took a deep breath in and out through his nose. “But that doesn’t mean I don’t love you or that I didn’t love you because I did and still do,” she said, crying slightly. 

Landon nodded his head. “I know,” he cried back. 

Josie’s tears drop from her eyes and land on her sweatpants. “You gave me the best gift anyone can give me, Lan and he’s going to be ours and no one else’s,” she added as she glanced over at him. Landon sniffed and didn’t say anything. “He’s going to be something we share together and that’s something I will cherish forever,” she added. 

Landon looked over at her and he always hated it when Josie cried (which was a lot by the way) but this time she’s crying because she felt like she hurt someone she cares about and that’s something she never wanted to do. He’s not going to lie, she did hurt him but he’s never going to say that to her face — he never wanted to make her feel worse. “You made me a dad, Josie,” he whispered. “I can’t and will never ever fucking hate you,” he added. 

Josie nodded her head as she looked away from him. Landon took a deep breath in and released before looking straight ahead. “Do you—uh—do you remember the first time I told you that I love you?” Landon asked and Josie looked over at him in shock before nodding her head. “I meant everything I said, Jo,” he said. “I will love you forever and I don’t care about who you’re with, boy or girl,” he said. 

Josie quivered her lip. “I know,” 

He nodded his head. “I love you,” he said with a crack in his voice. “And it’s because I love you that I can’t be mad at you.” He added and Josie and him grabbed hands, intertwining fingers. “I can’t be mad at you for being you, despite how it happened,” he added. 

Josie nodded her head, looking over at him. “I love you too,” she said before they leaned in for a hug. Landon sighed with relief as he hugged his ex for the first time in six months. He’s wanted to do this for a very long time. He just didn’t know how the hell do approach if but this is definitely one way to do it if he says so himself. They hugged for a while and Landon could feel her gripping onto him hard. Like she never wanted to let him go again. 

He closed his eyes as they pulled apart and rested their foreheads against each other. Her hand was on her cheek and his was on her knee. “I will never forget you,” she whispered and Landon nodded his head, whispering a soft, “I know,” and they weren’t sure who leaned in first but they were kissing, more of a goodbye kiss than anything and he was surprised that she was kissing him back. 

And it did feel amazing kissing her again...but all Landon really thought about while he was kissing her was….

Hope. 

“Jack Kirby?” Landon and Josie both pulled apart from each other and they both stood up quickly, a nurse with a clipboard was standing near the door, looking around. 

“Yes,” Josie said, putting her hand on his shoulder as she wiped her lips. “We’re his parents, is he okay?” She asked. 

The nurse smiled. “He’s feeling better that’s for sure. He won’t stop talking about the amazing baseball game he had,” she said, laughing. Landon and Josie chuckled. “He’s been asking for you two, you can come back,” she said, motioning for them to come. 

Landon cleared his throat awkwardly before letting Josie walk through first and then walking in himself. “Mommy!” Jack screamed excitedly as they walked into his room. 

Josie smiled widely. “Hi baby,” she squealed back as she rushed over to his bed and gave him a soft hug so she didn’t hurt him in anyway. Landon shook the doctor’s hand before he left the room and he shut the door. “How are you feeling?” Josie asked her son as she sat down next to him. 

Jack shrugged. “My tummy still hurts but it’s not like before,” he said softly. “Does this mean I have to come home with you or can daddy take me to school this week?” He asked. 

Landon and Josie both chuckle. “You can stay with daddy for a little bit longer if you want but you’re not going to school for a few days, maybe a week, okay?” Landon was shocked that she said that, he’s allowed to stay with him? He wasn’t complaining but it came as a shock. Jack smiled and nodded his head. “Okay, good,” Josie said chuckling. 

“Daddy,” Jack called. 

“Yeah buddy,” Landon responded. 

“Where’s Auntie Hope?” He asked. 

Landon’s smile fell from his face and he didn’t know what to say. Josie looked over at her and Landon swallowed hard. “I don’t know buddy,” he responded. 

“Will she be there when I get home?” He asked. 

“I hope so,” Landon responded. “I really hope so,” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You know what to do. Ten comments for the next chapter (different people)


	5. little did you know (how I’m breaking)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Landon sees Hope in a different light.

Landon and Josie sat in Jack’s hospital room and he is now asleep. Landon’s been looking down at his phone constantly waiting to see if Hope texted him back but she hasn’t and everytime he looks down at the screen he gets disappointed. It sucks thinking he fucked this up. He looked up at Josie who is on the phone with Penelope. “Yeah, baby. I'll call you when we get out okay?” She said. Landon saw her smile at something that Penelope had said and that warmed his heart, he’s actually happen she’s happy. 

Despite what he has said before, he knows that Penelope makes her happy and that she’s good with Jack and that’s all that really matters in the end. “I love you too,” Josie said and that’s hurt a little bit hearing but he knew it was true when she said it so he didn’t think too much into it. 

If only he had someone to talk to like that — his person was Hope and now she’s not responding to him. But obviously that’s his own fault and he’s going to have to deal with the consequences of his own actions. He glared down at the screen again and nothing was there, just the messages that he sent Hope over two hours ago. 

**LANDON (3:21AM):** I’m sorry, Hope. I never meant to hurt you by saying what I said.

**LANDON (8:34AM):** Jack’s in the hospital, it’s his appendix. Can you come or you working? 

**LANDON (11:26AM):** Not talking to me, worse kind of punishment I could ever receive but definitely deserve it. 

Landon sighed deeply as he scratched the back of his head and his leg began to shake. Josie ended the call with Penelope and she noticed how anxious he is getting. She knows that whatever is going on with Hope is serious because they always talk, at least text each other everyday and he keeps looking at his phone so she obviously hasn’t responded yet. “So,” Josie said, crossing her legs. 

He cleared his throat and stuffed his phone in his jean pocket. “So,” he mimicked her slowly. 

Josie tilted her head slightly. “Do you wanna tell me why you and Hope aren’t talking or am I going to have to start guessing because I guarantee I’ll get it right the first try,” she asked and smiled at him when he met her eyes. 

Landon chuckled, shaking his head. “I know you’re not lying because you do know me very well,” he said smiling. Josie gave him a wink before bringing her knees up to her chin, waiting for him to continue. Landon sighed, scratching the back of his head. “I was a dick to her,” he said. 

“What did you do?” Josie asked, leaning her chin against her knee. “Because you’re always a dick so what made it different this time?” She asked next. 

Landon mocked her before rolling his eyes. “Uh, I’ve been thinking about her in a different way recently and it scared me,” he explained and Josie smirked. “Basically I’ve been having sex dreams about her,” he said, being straight forward with her because he’s comfortable with her. “And I may have told her that it kind of disgusted me,” he said. 

Josie huffed a chuckle. “Really? Oh my god Landon,” 

“I know, I know.” Landon whispered, his leg still shaking. “And then I found out that she has had feelings for me since high school,” he added. 

Josie nodded her head. “I know,” Landon looked up at her in shock. “Come on, Lan. It was pretty obvious, she was subtle about it,” she chuckled next. 

He sighed. “It’s only been less than twelve hours and not talking to her is fucking hard, Jo,” he said. 

“I know, I can tell,” she responded. “Would it be so bad if you guys were more than friends?” she asked. 

Landon shrugged. “I’ve never really considered it — because it’s always been you,” he said honestly and Josie nodded her head in understanding. “But I will admit, every time she’s with Ethan, I get this feeling in my stomach that I’m not used to,” he said, honestly. “Kind of like jealousy,” he chuckled. Josie chuckled and nodded her head. “What?” He asked. 

She shook her head. “Nothing it’s just, it kind of reminds me of what happened with Penelope and I,” she said. 

“Have you noticed it?” Landon asked. “The “tension” between Hope and I? Lizzie said it was the reason why her and Hope broke up,” he said softly. 

“It was pretty obvious, Lan,” she said. 

Landon chuckled. “To everyone except me,” he said. 

“I think you two would look cute together,” she said, shrugging.

Landon shrugged his shoulders. “You know, we’ve never kissed before, like you’ve heard of friendships where best friends kiss at least once in their lifetime, like whether it’s from a game of spin the bottle or truth or dare,” he said. Josie nodded her head. “And I’ve thought about kissing her, a lot recently and I’m not sure if it’s because you and I aren’t together anymore and I’m horny,” he chuckled and Josie laughed too. “Or it’s because,” he paused. 

“You have feelings for her?” Josie suggested. 

Landon shook his head. “She’s with Ethan, I can’t,” 

Josie laughed. “Oh my god, you’re so stubborn,” she said. Landon rolled his eyes at her, leaning his head against the palm of his hand as his elbow is resting on the arm of the very uncomfortable chair. “I promise you, Lan -- If you were to tell her that you have feelings for her, she would pick you. She will always pick you,” she said. 

Landon shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know about that anymore,” he chuckled slightly. “I was awful to her, Jo. I don’t think she will ever trust me again,” he added sadly. 

Josie licked her lips and looked over at her son before pulling at her bottom lip. “You know when it was when I realized that Hope had feelings for you?” she asked and Landon raised an eyebrow in response. “When you told her I was pregnant,” she said. 

Landon chuckled, nodding his head. “Yeah, your sister said the same thing,” he whispered softly. 

“You should just tell her what you’re feeling, Landon,” she said, giving him a nod. 

“I don’t know what I’m feeling, Josie. That’s the thing. I don’t want to lead her on because that would make me worse than anyone she’s ever been with,” Landon said. 

“No one can be as bad as Roman Sienna,” Josie said. He chuckled and nodded his head. “He was a fucking asshole who didn’t care about anyone but his ego and sex,” she added. 

“Sex is a touchy subject nowadays,” Landon said. 

Josie nodded her head. “I’m sure she’d have it with you,” 

Landon laughed, loudly. “Sex is not on the table for us, Jo. We’ve never even kissed,” he added. 

“Hate sex is always the best,” she wiggled her eyebrows. “You and I had a lot of that,” she added. 

Landon let out a large sigh as he blushed. “Oh my god,” he mumbled. 

Josie giggled. “Hey, just because I’m gay doesn’t mean I didn’t enjoy sex with you, because I did. You’re good in bed and any girl would be lucky to get the experience with you,” she said as she reached over and grabbed her cup of coffee off the table and took a sip of it. 

“I don’t know,” Landon said, he’s still very hesitant about his relationship with Hope. 

Josie licked the coffee off her top lip as she stared at her ex, he’s overthinking things again. Like he always does. “Landon Kirby, look at me,” she said as she placed the coffee cup on her lap. Landon looked over at her with a sheepy smile and waited for her to say what she needed to say. “What’s your favorite thing about Hope?” She asked. 

“My favorite thing about her?” Landon repeated. 

Josie nodded her head. “Yeah, like what makes you feeling bubbly inside when you think about her. It can be a physical feature of hers or a trait about her,” she clarified. 

Landon thought about it for a second, tapping his finger against his scalp. Josie waited and waited for him to say something and she smiled knowing how hard he is thinking about this. “I don’t know,” he whispered. “I guess, I really like the way she plays with her fingers when she’s nervous,” he smiled. “And the way her eyes light up whenever she gets a question right when she studies,” he added. 

Josie tilted her head to the side and smiled. “And she does this little thing with her lips when she’s talking about something she loves, like when she’s talking about medical stuff that I don’t understand, I don’t care because her lip like twitches in excitement and it’s cute,” he added, smiling sillingy. “Or the way she used to rub circles on my back when I couldn’t sleep at night, that used to always make me fall asleep,” he added. 

Josie pulled out her phone in the middle of Landon’s rant and started to videotape him saying all of this stuff. She wants him to be happy, she wants him to be happy with Hope. At first, she wasn’t a big fan of their friendship but the last couple of months, not being with him romantically -- she’s gotten a different look at Hope’s love for Landon, and she really does think it’s beautiful. 

“She also has different kinds of laughs,” Landon smiled thinking about it. “Her sad laugh, her genuienly happy laugh, her “I’m going to fucking pee my pants,” laugh,” he continued to list off. Josie stared at him with a huge grin. Landon’s smile falls off his face. “But, while those things are great,” he said. “My favorite trait about her is how amazing she is with Jack,” he said. “And her ocean eyes.” he added. “I call her ocean all the time because of them,” he continued. 

Landon looked up at Josie (she had already stopped recording) and she had a huge cheeky grin on her face. “What?” Landon asked softly as he shifted in his seat. 

“I said favorite, as in one,” she smiled. Landon opened his mouth to respond but there was a knock on the door. “Come in,” Josie said as she stood up from the seat and the door slowly opened and Landon’s mouth fell open when she saw who it was. Hope walked in, dressed in a formal dress and her hair wasn’t in a ponytail like it normally is. Her hair is curled to perfection and she wore heels that made her almost as tall as Josie (and Josie is tall). 

Landon’s hand fell off his cheek as he looked up at her -- Josie looked over at him and smirked quietly as Hope swallowed hard. “I heard he was in the hospital,” she said as she had something in her hand. “I can’t stay long but I just wanted to come by and leave this for him, I figured he’d be asleep,” she said holding a bag out towards Josie. 

Landon stood up from his seat. She’s not even looking at him. “He and I were supposed to do puzzles today but with this hospital visit and something that happened last night, I won’t be able to make it,” she explained. Landon crossed his arms over his chest, scanning Hope’s body. He definitely feels something for her, sexually at least, right? He really does the way Hope makes him feel. “I got six, I didn’t know which one he wanted so I got him all of them,” she added. 

Josie smirked and grabbed the bag. “Thanks,” Josie said. 

Hope nodded her head. “Uh, I can’t stay, like I said. I’ve got this award ceremony with Ethan at 1 so I have to head there now,” she said, pushed a piece of hair out of her face. 

Josie glanced over at Landon and he was staring at her dress (most likely her ass) with his mouth open and his eyes widened. “You look beautiful, Hope. Does she look beautiful, Landon?” Josie asked her ex boyfriend. 

Landon looked up at her like a deer in headlights. “Huh?” Hope looked over her shoulder slightly. She didn’t want to look at him because she’s afraid she’s going to break down and she doesn’t want to ruin this ceremony for Ethan or her make up. What he said really hurt her. “Uh, yeah.” He said, awkwardly as he cleared his throat. Josie threw him a look, trying to push him to say more. “Your hair is down,” he said. 

Josie let out a sigh and tilted her head up towards the ceiling. He did not just say that? Did he really just say that? Hope huffed a laugh, rolling her eyes. “Yeah,” she said, nodding her head. “I am a girl, Landon,” she snapped back. 

“I didn’t mean—,” Landon whispered. 

“Yeah, you don’t mean a lot of this nowadays,” Hope bit back before turning towards Josie. “Make sure he knows that I’ll see him again soon. I don’t want him to think I forgot about him,” she said and Josie gave her a small nod before Hope turned, without even looking at Landon and left the room. 

Landon shut his eyes and sighed deeply and while he did that, he felt something hit his chest, hard. “Owe! What the fuck?” He exclaimed and looked down at object that Josie threw at his chest and it was a tube of chapstick. 

“Your hair is down? What the hell was that?” Josie exclaimed. “What kind of shit are you on?” She added. 

“I don’t —,” Landon stuttered. “I’ll be right back,” Landon quickly rushed out of the room, almost tripping over himself while he did so. He doesn’t know what he’s going to say but he’s got to try and fix this. “Hope!” Landon rushed over to the elevator and Hope is standing there — she turned at the sound of her name being called. “Hope,” he added. 

Hope saw him and rolled her eyes. “Leave me alone, Landon,” she pressed the button a few times. Landon rushed over to her and grabbed her shoulder. “Let go of me!” Hope pulled away from him roughly. 

“Please, let me talk!” Landon begged. 

“You talked plenty last night, Landon,” Hope bit back. 

Landon was breathing heavily. “I know you have feelings or well had feelings for me in high school, okay?” Hope’s eyes widened and her stomach turned. “You don’t need to be embarrassed okay? I’m an ass and I’m sorry for the way I reacted to the change between us,” he said. 

“I didn’t realize there was a change between us,” Hope said as the elevator opened and Hope stepped in and Landon quickly stepped in as well — Hope rolled her eyes. 

“There was a change between us when I started to have dreams about you giving me a blowjob,” he said and that’s when Hope’s cheeks heat up, she doesn’t make eye contact with him. “But that's besides the point,” he added. “Hope, listen to me okay. I don’t think it’s disgusting” he said. 

Hope crossed her arms and didn’t respond. “Did it scare me? Yes but that’s only because you’re my best friend and if we went there, I don’t want it to affect us being friends because if I lost you forever,” he said rapidly. 

“You know, Landon. If you doubted our friendship like that,” Hope looked up at him. “Do you really know me at all?” She asked him, Landon’s mouth falls open and then he watched as the elevator door opened and Hope rolled her eyes at him and then rushed out. 

He didn’t rush after her. 

He fucked up and he knows it. He pushed the button to go up. He leaned against the wall of the elevator. He didn’t know how the hell he was going to fix this but he knew he had to unless he wanted to deal with not having Hope in his life and he doesn’t think he can handle that at all. 

* * *

**RAFAEL** : Yo, bro. Can you play tonight? 

**LANDON** : Nah man. My kid got his appendix taken out. I won’t be able to make it for at least a week. 

**RAFAEL** : Alright bro. Let me know when everything is cleared. Your slot here is always open. 

**LANDON** : Thanks man. 

Landon made it back to his apartment while Josie stayed with Jack at the hospital. He needed to take a shower and get some sleep seeing he didn’t get any sleep the night before since Jack was up all night throwing up. Landon dropped his keys on the front table before slipping his boats off and then heading upstairs. 

The apartment is really quiet without Hope that’s it’s almost creepy. He wasn’t used to all this quiet. He took his jacket off before sitting down on his bed and took off his socks. He’s ready to shower and get to bed. 

He took his shirt off and stood up to unbuckle his pants when there was a knock on his door. He jumped and looked over and noticed he didn’t close it. Hope stood there in different clothing since the last he had seen her. He smiled softly. “Hi,” he whispered. 

Hope gave him a weak smile. “I talked to Josie,” she said as she shyly walked further into his bedroom. Landon put his hands in his jeans pockets and stared at her, lovingly. She’s finally talking to him normally. “She said you would be here and I just, I really wanted to talk.” She added. 

Landon gave her a nod and then motioned to the bed. “Do you want to sit down?” He asked her.

Hope looked at the bed and then shook her head. “I just want to say what I have to say and get it over with and deal with the heartbreak,” she said and Landon raised an eyebrow. “I’ve been in love with you since I was sixteen, Landon. That’s like almost ten years and I know it sounds crazy to even say this because we’ve never even kissed or talked about it but you were it for me,” she said. 

He didn’t ruin the moment for her, in fact he was enjoying something like this coming from her. “I saw you with Josie and I was jealous and when you guys broke up, I felt relieved because then I had a chance but then I met Ethan and things changed,” she explained. “You give me these feelings inside of me, my muscles, my bones, everything in my body was on fire when I’m with you,” she added. 

Landon took a step towards her. “Even a little bit of thinking about you gets me so,” Landon did a brave move and brought his hand to her face and cradled it softly. “Wet,” she whispered and Landon smiled softly. 

“Well we should do something about that,” he whispered and when he leaned in to kiss her, he felt her palm on his lips. He groaned softly as he pulled back. “That’s not what I was expecting,” he said next. 

“I’m being serious, Landon,” she said. 

Landon nodded his head. “I know you are,” he said. “And I am too. These sex dreams I’ve been having of you, Hope. It’s a sign. It’s a sign that I have feelings for you,” he said. 

“It’s a sign or a feeling?” Hope whispered. 

Landon shrugged. “Both,” she whispered. “You give me this feeling that I’ve never felt before and I want to act on it, and I trust that if it doesn’t work, our friendship will be okay,” he said next, grabbing her waist and pulling her closer so her hands fall on his cleanly shaved chest. “It’s all on you, Hope. Tell me what you want and I’ll obey,” he said. 

Hope stared into green eyes before running her hands down his biceps to his triceps casually. “I want you to kiss me,” she said and that’s when Landon smiled and leaned down, pressing his lips against hers. Hope’s hands fell into his hair and she kissed him back softly. 

Landon’s stomach exploded in his pants — this is what it feels like to kiss his best friend. It’s amazing. “I’ve wanted to do that for so long,” she whispered. 

Landon laughed and nodded his head. “I think I have too,” 

“Then wake up,” Hope said and that’s when Landon pulled back and looked at her. “Wake up, Landon,” she said. 

“Are you good? I am awake,” he said laughing. 

“No you’re not,” she said. 

“What?” Landon questioned. 

“Landon, wake up!” 

“Hope! I’m awake. I literally just kissed you, what is going on?” He asked, putting his hand on her face and when he did that, there was blood covering his hand. His eyes widened and he looked down at it in panic. “What the hell?” He asked. 

“LANDON WAKE UP!” 

Landon woke up coughing but he wasn’t surrounded by anything he had just seen, this time he was in his car and his head was hurting like crazy. He opened and closed his eyes trying to adjust to the light and when he finally did, he realized that he was in a ditch and his leg was bleeding badly as well as his head. Oh no, he remembers what happened, he was driving home and he was so tired he must’ve fallen asleep at the wheel. 

“Hope,” he whispered. 

He screamed and screamed and there was nothing — his car was probably going to explode and there is no one around to come help him. 

“HELP!!!” 

He can scream but no one is coming. 

He knows that now more than ever. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry not sorry. You know what to do.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Landon relives a certain event involving Hope and him in high school while he’s on the verge of death

“Help,” Landon called out loudly, trying to move from the car but his leg was stuck somewhere and he couldn’t remove himself. He doesn’t know how he ended up here because he usually takes the city way in order to get home but he must’ve taken a different or not realized what way he took because he’s surrounded by trees and he couldn’t hear any cars riding by.

He’s stuck. 

He’s stuck by himself. 

He leaned his head back against the headrest and tried to catch his breath. He can’t feel his leg but it’s definitely broken or something — it’s most likely from the shock. 

There’s a lot of blood coming from his head and he’s beginning to feel a little lightheaded. 

It’s dark outside so he’s been out here for a while and he fucking cold. “HELP!!!” He yelled out but there was one around the area that can find him. 

“Help,” he cried out softer this time as he tried to wiggle himself out of the car. 

He was in full on tears now — he’s supposed to be at the hospital by now, he knows that they will notice that something is off and come find him. 

He reached and looked around for his phone but when he found it, the screen was shattered and he couldn’t help but cry more, there was no changing this at all. 

He threw the phone on the passenger seat next to him and leaned his head back again, trying to stop himself from crying but nothing was working. He knows that. 

“HELP!!!!” He screamed loudly. 

He felt himself fading away — the pain was too much for him to bare at this moment. 

His eyes started to get heavy and his breathing started to settle, like his body was giving out on him. And the flashes on the one person he wants to see the most in the world is Hope. Her ocean blue eyes and her beautiful smile. 

“Hope,” Landon whispered before he slipped away. 

* * *

**_December 12th, 2010_ **

_ Junior Year of High School  _

“WAKE UP DORK!” Landon felt something hit the back of his head and he jumped up, groaning. “WE,” HIT. “HAVE,” HIT. “TO GO,” HIT. “SCHOOL,” and when she went to hit him again, Landon grabbed the pillow and threw it across the room. Hope pouted at it as she looked at the pillow. “Oh my gosh, that was my favorite pillow,” she said next. 

“Let me sleep,” he said.

Hope chuckled and started tickling him. “Landon Scott Kirby, get your ass up. I let you spend the night without my parents knowing so you have to climb out the window and pretend to come through the door,” she whispered loudly. 

“Hope, how many times have I told you? Don’t use my middle name!” He muffled into the pillow. Landon always ended up showing up to Hope’s house in the middle of the night when him and his dad don’t get along. He does always fall asleep better with her in the bed next to her. 

“Landon, seriously, you gotta get up and put some clothes on before my dad thinks we’re sleeping together,” she said but there was a change in her voice. 

Landon groaned before standing up off the bed, stretching. Hope admired his bare back. Hope’s feelings for Landon have progressed rapidly. She didn’t expect it to be like this. She never wanted this to happen but she couldn’t help it. He’s literally the greatest guy in the entire world and pretty much the only one that cares about her. 

Her last boyfriend, Roman was a total dick. Didn’t care about anything but sex and his ego. Landon, he cares about everything but sex and his ego. While he does care about girls and everything (most teenage boys do) he cares to a certain structure. He cares about Hope mostly. He turned towards her and rubbed his stomach. Hope smiled at him. He raised an eyebrow at her. “What?” He asked. 

Hope bit her lip. “Nothing,” she said. 

Landon rolled his eyes at her. “You’re a dork, Mikaelson,” he said as he grabbed his shirt and put it over his head. “Are you coming to Raf’s party tonight?” He asked her, grabbing his jeans from the chair. “Josie’s going to be there and I think I’m finally going to make my move,” he said, smiling. 

Landon turned his back towards her and pulled his jeans up, Hope couldn’t help but frown. Josie Saltzman, tall and gorgeous. Brown eyes that Landon fell for the moment he looked into them. Hope was going to tell Landon how she felt but then Landon started talking about Josie and about wanting to ask her out so she kept her mouth shut. 

“Hope?” Landon called out. Hope snapped out of her daydream and she looked up at him. “Are you coming tonight? Rafael said there isn’t going to be heavy drinking or anything, just some friends and some fun,” he added. 

Hope shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t know. I’m not the partying type and besides, I have an AP Chem test on Monday and I have to spend time studying,” she said. 

Landon put his boots on and then looked at his best friend with a smile. “You afraid of see Lizzie since you guys broke up?” He asked him. 

“Lizzie and I are friends, Landon,” she rolled her eyes. “And I’m not afraid of that. I’m afraid of failing a chemistry test. And spending a weekend with crazy teenagers is not how I’m supposed to spend my weekend,” she said. 

“Come for an hour,” Landon begged her, as he walked over and put his hands on her face. “You will have a fun night and besides, I need my best friend there to be beside me,” he added, rubbing his thumb on her cheek. 

Hope scanned his eyes and her heart was banging against her chest. She didn’t know how to control her emotions with him especially when he touches her. “Okay,” she whispered. 

Landon smiled. “That’s my girl,” he said before kissing her forehead and then back away. His girl? She wishes. “I will come up to the front door and come pick you up for school,” he said grabbing his backpack. “I love you, Ocean,” he smiled as he climbed out of the window. 

“I love you too,” Hope frowned as he left. 

* * *

Hope is sitting on Ethan’s when there’s a knock on the door. She looked up from her textbooks and then over at the clock. It’s 1:34AM, why the hell is someone here this late? 

Hope dropped her pencil and closed the book before standing up and walking over to it. 

She looked through the peephole and her eyebrows furrowed and then she unlocked the door before opening. “Josie?” She questioned as she grabbed her arms around her body before glancing behind her. “What are you doing here?” She asked next. 

“I wouldn’t be here if I wasn’t desperate,” she said. “Have you seen Landon?” She asked. 

“We’re not exactly talking at the moment,” she responded. 

“Hope I’m being serious,” she said softly. 

“Okay? Uh, no,” she said, shaking her head. “I haven’t seen him since he was at the hospital. Why?” She asked. 

Josie sighed deeply. “He was supposed to come back to the hospital after he went home to get some rest and take a shower,” she said. “And he never showed up,” she explained. 

“Okay,” Hope shrugged. “Did you check the apartment? He sometimes likes to climb up on the roof and look at a few of the city late at night and he falls asleep.” She said. 

“Hope,” Josie whispered. “It’s been three days,” she said next and that’s when Hope’s heart dropped. “He would miss out on what’s going on with Jack, you know that,” she added. 

“What are you saying?” She whispered. 

“I think something bad happened,” Josie whispered 

* * *

Landon and Hope entered the house that the party was happening at and Landon was automatically greeted by all his friends and Hope awkwardly stood in the back waiting to see if Lizzie has shown up yet. She knows Lizzie can’t miss a good party and she texted her earlier and said she was going so she better be here. “Missing me already?” She jumped at the sound of her ex’s voice was she turned around and saw Lizzie standing there with a huge smile on her face. “Damn, gorgeous. You’re jumpy today,” she said. 

Hope sighed deeply. “I’m a little everything today,” she said. “I don’t want to be here but Landon insisted on coming because your sister’s going to be here,” she added as Lizzie handed her a cup of soda which she thanked her for. She knows that Hope doesn’t drink (her father is a heavy drinker) 

Lizzie and her walk to the kitchen where no one is and Hope munches on chips sitting out on the counter before pulling herself up and sitting down. “So, Josie and Landon huh?” Lizzie asked curiously. 

Hope shrugged. “He’s been wanting to ask her out for a while now, won’t stop talking about it,” she said. 

Lizzie narrowed her eyes. “Huh,” she huffed before shaking her head. “I don’t see it, Josie’s too—,”

“Bitchy,” Hope said without hesitation. 

Lizzie raised an eyebrow at her but Hope didn’t take back what she said about her at all. “That’s still my sister you’re talking about, Mikaelson,” she said. 

“Okay,” Hope stated. “Well, your sister’s a bitch,” she smiled as she ate another chip happingly. 

Lizzie rolled her eyes. “I’m pretty sure that my dad, mom and I all feel the same way about that statement but you’re just better at expressing it,” Lizzie said as she hopped onto the counter and sat herself next to Hope. Hope took a sip of her soda. “So, have you talked to Landon yet?” She asked. 

“About?” Hope questioned. 

“Your feelings for him,” she said. 

Hope choked on her soda. “What?” She exclaimed. 

“You didn’t think I would break up with you for no reason did you?” Lizzie asked with a huge grin. 

“Oh my god is it that obvious?” Hope asked Lizzie. 

Lizzie chuckled, shaking her head. “It’s not obvious to him if that’s what you’re asking,” she said. 

Hope shut her eyes and sighed deeply. “It’s getting out of hand, Liz. I can’t stop thinking about him. It’s like every damn time I close my eyes he’s there,” she said next. “And him always coming over and sleeping in my bed basically naked isn’t helping either but I can’t say no to him,” she added. 

“Landon Kirby is sleeping naked in bed next to you and you haven’t slept with him?” Lizzie asked. 

Hope blushed. “He doesn’t want to have sex with me, Lizzie and he’s a virgin so I have to respect that,” she said. 

“He’s stupid,” Lizzie sighed deeply. 

“It’s whatever, Liz. I don’t think too much of it.” She said 

“Why don’t we go out there and show him what he’s missing?” Lizzie suggested as she jumped down from the counter with a huge smile on her face. Hope shook her head. “Hope Andrea Mikaelson, you are fucking sexy so get your ass up and go show Landon Kirby everything you have to show him,” she said softly. 

“He’s not going to see me that way, Lizzie.” Hope groaned as Lizzie grabbed her hand and pulled her off the counter. Lizzie shushed her before dragging her out of the kitchen and into where everyone else is. Hope stayed close behind Lizzie as they made their way through the crowd. 

Hope always hate huge crowds — which is ironic because she wants to be a doctor one day and that requires working in tight spaces with a lot of people. She knows that she will love it anyways, it doesn’t matter to her that much. 

They pass a few football jocks that were whistling at them which Lizzie rolled her eyes at and Hope just stayed glued to her back but as they passed the football players, she felt something touch her ass. She flinched and that caught Lizzie’s attention so she turned around. “What happened?” Lizzie asked Hope softly. 

“He pinched my ass,” Hope said shyly. 

Lizzie narrowed her eyes at him. “What’s your problem, Ron?” Lizzie asked, stepping in front of Hope. 

Ron smirked. “What? She was asking for it,” he laughed. 

“You think all girls are asking it for it — but news flash asshole, not every girl is dumb enough to sleep with you,” Lizzie snapped back. 

“It’s not my fault she has a nice ass,” Ron said, scanning Hope while he bit down on his lip. 

“Ron, shut up,” Lizzie said. 

Ron tried to take a step towards Hope. “What do you say baby girl? You wanna go upstairs?” Ron asked. 

“I think she’ll pass,” Hope looked up and beside her. Landon walked into the situation and stepped in front of girls and looked Ron straight into the eyes. 

“Kirby, move,” Ron laughed. “I’m just trying to talk to a sexy girl, right princess?” Ron asked her. 

“Don’t call her that,” Landon said. 

“Landon it’s fine,” Hope said, grabbing Landon’s arm. 

“Yeah Landon,” Ron smirked. “It’s fine, just like her ass,” and Landon wasn’t taking another second of this. His knuckles hit Ron straight in the mouth and Ron was knocked out instantly and that’s when everyone gasped and backed away as Ron’s body crashed to the ground. Hope looked down at Ron and then back up at Landon with her mouth open. 

Landon turned towards Hope, putting his hands on her face. “Are you okay?” He whispered. Hope put her hand on top his and nodded her head. “You’re okay,” he whispered before kissing her forehead. “Do you wanna go home?” He asked. 

Hope nodded her head. “Okay,” he said. 

“I’ll take her home,” Lizzie said. 

“What? No it’s fine—,” Landon said. 

“Landon,” Hope whispered and Landon looked down at her and stared into her eyes. “I’m okay. Stay and hang out with Raf, I’ll see you tonight — call me if you need me to pick you up okay?” She whispered. 

“Hope, I’ll take you—,” 

Hope leaned up and kissed his cheek, causing him to stop talking. Landon’s hands fall to her waist and his eyes shut before Hope’s lips release from his cheek. “I’ll be okay,” she whispered as her thumb rub against his cheek. 

Landon shook his head. “I should go home with you,” 

“Landon, please?” Hope whispered. 

Landon sighed and nodded his head. “Okay,” he whispered. 

Hope smiled softly. “I’ll see you later okay?” She said and Landon nodded his head. “I love you,” she added. 

“I love you too, ocean,” Landon said and then Hope smiled weakly at him before walking away with Lizzie. Landon watched his best friend leave and all he wanted to do was go with her but she didn’t want that so he stayed. 

He stayed and got drunk, pushing away any thoughts that involve Hope Mikaelson (he didn’t want to worry about her)

* * *

Hope unlocked the door to the apartment and carefully pushed the door open. She never figured she would be going through something like this but the thought of losing Landon just makes her heartache more than words. 

She wanted to feel close to him so she headed him for the first time in four days. She turned the lights on and looked around this place and nothing seemed out of place which was a sign of relief. If it was bad then she would feel awful. 

She dropped her keys on the counter and then headed upstairs to the bedrooms. She went to Landon’s bedroom and pushed the door open and noticed that his bed was messy and there were clothes all over the place. 

She walked in, shaking like crazy. She knows at any point, she’s going to break down as much as she doesn’t want to. She walked over to Landon’s dresser and looked around. 

She ran her finger across the wood and then up to the mirror and grab the picture of then two and pulled it out of the mirror and looked at it. She smiled sadly at it before turning it over and looking at the writing on the back of it. 

_ “I love you, Lan,”  _

_ 11.12.13  _

She remembers this picture and where it was taken. 

It was a beach trip they took and Landon had won her a Polaroid camera. It was the first picture they took with it. 

She put the picture back and then opened the drawer in the dresser and grabbed the first piece of clothing that she could reach and it was a sweatshirt (his basketball sweatshirt from high school) which had his last name on it. 

She ran her fingers across the lettering of his last name before she brought it up to her face and smelled it. It smells like him. She felt herself tearing up. 

She took her jacket and shirt off and then threw the sweatshirt over her head and then smelled the sleeve again before looking at herself in the mirror. His sweatshirt is so big on her that it’s almost adorable. 

She hugged herself before walking over to his messy bed and sitting herself down on it, taking her shoes off and then her pants before slipping underneath the covers, automatically smell his cologne and scent. 

She couldn’t help but get emotional. 

He has to be okay. 

Hope’s lip quivered at the thought of losing Landon. 

She can’t do it. She can’t lose him. It won’t happen. 

The tears hit the pillow as she shuts her eyes and cries. She cries and cries until she didn’t have any tears left. 

He has to be okay. 

She will never forgive herself if he isn’t. 

* * *

Landon was shivering, his leg was no longer there (Metaphorically speaking of course) and he keeps falling asleep and then waking up. Like he’s passing out and then waking himself up somehow. He just keeps having the same dream over and over again. The one of that night at the party — the one where he protected Hope from the asshole who pinched her ass. He wants (needs) to know what the significance of that night is to what is happening now. 

He doesn’t remember anything besides kicking the guy’s ass and then taking Hope home — or well, Hope taking him home because he had been drinking, even though he said there wasn’t going to be heavy drinking. 

His eyes began to shut again and he started to remember. 

* * *

Landon is hunched over the toilet in Hope’s bedroom after throwing up for twenty minutes and Hope is outside the, leaning against the door. He didn’t want her in there while he did this so she just sat down against the door waiting for him to be done. She wasn’t going to leave him. “Landon?” Hope called out when she had heard any puking for a few minutes. He must be either done or passed out. She turned and stood up off the ground. “Landon?” She called again.

The sound of the sink turning on filled her ears and there after a few minutes of that, it turned off and the door opened, revealing tired looking Landon. “I fucking hate alcohol,” he whispered as he brushed passed Hope, grabbing the edge of his shirt and taking it off. 

Hope wrapped her arms around her body and watched him as he walked to his side of the bed and took his jeans off. “You’re staying the night?” Hope whispered. 

Landon rubbed his face. “I always do,” he smiled at her before sitting down on the bed, his back facing her. “Besides, if I showed up like this with my dad home, I wouldn’t be hearing the end of it and I don’t feel like dealing with his bullshit today,” he added, honestly. 

Hope nodded her head even though he was facing away from her. “Hey, Lan?” Hope called out and he hummed in response as he continued to scratch his head. “What do you see in Josie?” She asked him. 

Landon tilted his head over his shoulder. “Uh,” he shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know, she’s beautiful, heartfelt and cares about other people before herself. She’s not selfish like most of the girls I know and she likes me the way I am, not for who I am in school,” he said. 

Hope nodded her head, looking down at her hands. “What about me?” She asked. 

“What about you?” Landon asked. 

Hope shrugged her shoulders. “Have you ever seen me as someone else other than your best friend?” She asked. 

Landon chuckled — that broke her heart. That one chuckle. It’s like she was being stabbed in the heart twenty seven times without any warning. Why do guys have to be like that? What the hell is wrong with them? “No,” he snickered. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, Hope. You’re beautiful but you’re not really my type,” he said next. 

“Yeah,” Hope frowned before walking over to her dresser and grabbing her PJ’s. Landon jumped as she slammed the dresser drawer closed roughly. She threw a shirt at him and he looked at it. “I don’t want you sleeping naked in my bed anymore,” she said sternly. 

“I have boxers on,” he said. 

“I don’t care,” she said, shrugging. “We’re just friends, remember?” She added as she walked to her bathroom. 

“Hope,” Landon called out as he stood up and followed her but she slammed the door in his face before he could reason with her. “What do you mean we’re just friends? I didn’t realize we were supposed to be more,” he said through the door as he knocked a few times but she wasn’t moving. 

“Hope!” Landon hit the door with his fist. “Hope come out of there so we can talk about this,” he said next but the sound of the water turning on comes into his ears. Landon let out a sigh as he ran his hands through his hair. He grabbed the doorknob and opened the door. “Ho—,” he stopped when he saw Hope standing there, naked. 

“Landon!” Hope squealed as she quickly grabbed the shower curtain and covered herself. “What the hell is your problem? I’m taking a shower!” She added. 

“I—,” Landon stuttered. 

“Get out,” Hope yelled. 

Landon was too shocked to say anything. He’s either really drunk still or he’s been attracted to Hope for a while now but was stupid to see it. “You—,” he started.

“Landon, get out,” she said. 

Landon shook his head. “No,” he said as he closed the door to the bathroom and walked closer to him. Hope’s heart starts to beat rapidly against her chest. “I want to shower too,” he whispered softly. 

Hope knows that Landon is drunk right now, she knows that he won’t remember whatever is about to happen in the morning and will it hurt her? Yes but is she going to pass up and opportunity to see this man naked? Obviously not. She’s seen him shirtless plenty of times but seeing the whole deal is going to be a different experience. She obviously doesn’t plan on sleeping with him but she does plan on showering with him and that’s it? Right? That’s all he wants. 

Hope is beginning to realize that Landon has felt the sexual tension between them too, but he’s just been too worked up with the fact that they are best friends to push it forward. And the fact that he’s an honest drunk, he’s finally letting the secret loose. Landon got closer and closer before grabbing the curtain that Hope had in front of her body — wanting to take it off. Hope closed her eyes as Landon slowly removed the curtain from her naked body. 

Hope’s hands automatically covered her breast and her eyes were on Landon’s naked chest. “Landon,” she whispered. 

“What?” Landon said. 

Hope glanced up at him. “I’m naked,” she said. 

Landon smirked. “I know,” he said. 

Hope’s face was completely red right now. “We’re—,” Hope was lost of words right now. She didn’t know what to expect of this situation. She never thought she would be in a situation right now. Especially with Landon. She’s not a virgin or anything but she knows he is. And he’s drunk and won’t remember this happened. She doesn’t want to take advantage of him. “We can’t,” she whispered. 

“Why?” Landon asked, pushed a piece of her hair behind her ear and then cradling her face. 

“Because you’re drunk and I’ll be taking advantage of the situation,” she responded. 

“It’s just a shower, Hope,” he said. 

Hope stared at him and didn’t respond. She could take the opportunity to see this boy naked or she pushes him away and not take advantage of a drunk man. “Land—,” and then Hope was cut off by Landon’s lips on hers. Hope’s eyes widened and her hands fell to his chest while his wrapped around her torso strongly. 

Her crush, her best friend is KISSING her. Is this real life? Hope kisses him back almost instantaneously. She wasn’t expecting this — just them showering together. Her parents aren’t home, they usually aren’t. Hope pulled away from the kiss and put her forehead on his. Her breathing is heavy and her body is on fucking fire. He won’t remember. He won’t remember this tomorrow. She knows that. 

“Landon,” Hope swallowed and then licked her lips as her hands fall to his waist. Landon’s hands are on her bare back. “You shouldn’t have done that,” she whispered. 

“I wanted to,” he said. 

Hope lets out a shaky sigh. “Yeah,” she mumbled before grabbing the back of his neck and kissing him again. Somehow, they ended up in shower, kissing and completely naked. Hope and Landon made out like it was first nature to them. They didn’t need to have any awkwardly chit chat in between kisses. Their lips stayed glued together for minutes at a time. Hope loves Landon’s hands roaming all over her body but making out in shower is a work out. 

Her hand stayed either glued to his waist or his wet hair while his roamed everywhere as well as his lips. His lips would occasionally make their way to her neck in which she would respond with a moan and a tuck of the hair, letting him know to make his way back north. She doesn’t want this to go anywhere else but this. “Why do you keep stopping me?” Landon whispered out of breath while he keeps giving her small pecks on the lips. 

“We can’t go further than this, Landon,” she responded. 

“We’re literally naked,” Landon said. 

“I realize that,” she said. 

“Let me go low on you,” he whispered, kissing the side of her mouth and then kissing her cheek and then grabbing the back of her head, making her neck arch to the side and then pushing his lips to her neck. Hope moaned and her eyes flutter shut and then Landon kissed down to her shoulder and then her collarbone. 

“Landon we—,” Landon’s hands fall to her waist as he kissed the middle of her chest, bending down. Hope’s hand was tangled in the back of his head as he kissed down her stomach. Her head tilted back against shower wall. She’s seriously about to let this happen? What is wrong with her? “We shouldn’t be—,” Hope shivered as Landon kissed right above her sex. She can’t stop him now. 

Hope looked down at him as he lifted her leg and put it over her shoulder. “Shhh, just lean back and enjoy the ride baby,” he whispered before inserting his face. 

Hope flinched at the contact — Roman never did this and Lizzie and her never slept together — surprisingly. Lizzie always wanted to wait until marriage which Hope had to respect for obvious reasons. The way that Landon moved his tongue was not the work of a virgin. There’s not fucking away in hell — Hope knows that. He was gentle and kind while Roman was always hard and mean. 

Hope ran her hands through his hair from his forehead back as he continued to do what he was doing. Her head leaned back and she was biting back her moans. She didn’t want to feel desperate with what he was doing. But it was hard because his tongue is literally magic. She brought her free hand up to her mouth and covered it. She doesn’t understand how he’s doing it but she’s on the verge of coming already and it’s only been like two minutes. 

Landon pulled away for a bit of air, as he placed a hand on her stomach and left kisses on it before going back in. “I think that’s—,” Hope’s eyes fluttered. “Ahh,” she moaned out as Landon picked up his speed. “Landon, Landon,” she repeated over and over again as he legs tightened around his head. But she didn’t come yet. She didn’t want it to be over and she wasn’t planning for it to be. 

She doesn’t know how but she’s sweaty. She looked down at him and his eyes met hers — this is actually happening. The guy she’s in love with is sucking her dry right now. Are they going to have sex? She really wants to at this point. She really does but it’s Landon’s first time, she doesn’t want to take that away from him unless he wants her to. 

Landon did something with his tongue that made Hope go overboard, her legs clinched again but this time she let out a loud moan and her body shook. “Ahh,” she screamed out loud before letting out a few short and heavy breaths of air as Landon kissed up her inner thigh to her stomach, to her chest and then her collarbone. Her hand stayed in his hair as he travelled up, his lips stay glued to her neck a few minutes before making his way up to her lips fully. “Oh my god,” she chuckled as snuck kisses from him. 

She could feel Landon’s mouth forming a smile against hers, he makes her so fucking happy it’s ridiculous. “Was that okay?” He whispered softly. 

Hope nodded her head, wiping his lips with her thumb. “That was fucking perfect, you’re so fucking perfect,” she whispered next before kissing him again. Hope swallowed hard after pulling away from the kiss. “Do you wanna, maybe—?” She asked softly. 

“Really?” Landon asked, shocked. 

“You’re not going to remember this in the morning, Landon,” she said softly, touching his face. “I want to take my chance of getting to do the one thing I’ve wanted to do the last year before I lose it,” she whispered. The fact that this is the way for Hope to get Landon to sleep with her is awful but she’s taking the opportunity. She wants this. 

Landon nodded his head, kissing her lips softly. “We need a condom,” he whispered against her lips. Hope gave him on peck before holding her finger at him and then she opened the curtain and turned the water off. 

“Come here,” she ordered him. Landon stepped out of the shower and walked over to the counter where Hope was. She didn’t even bother to dry herself off before she reached into a drawer of her sink cabinet and pulled out a box of condoms. Landon isn’t even going to bother asking. Hope hopped up onto the kitchen counter and pulled out a condom before grabbing a hold of Landon’s hand and pulling him closer to her. “Kiss me,'' she said. 

Landon did exactly that. “We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to,” Hope whispered against his lips. Landon knows that Hope knows it’s his first time and that’s why she’s doing this. He’s also pretty drunk (just has a good way of controlling it) and most definitely won't remember this tomorrow morning but that’s probably for the best right? They were bound to do this. Just do it now. 

Landon kissed her again. “I’m ready,” he said. 

Hope nodded her head before giving him three pecks and then opening the condom up with her teeth. Landon watched as she rolled it on him before grabbing a hold of his hips and pushing him more into her — her legs wrapped around his waist and she kissed him without inserting him into her yet. She wants this it be perfect. After a few minutes of kisses, Hope pulled away. “You ready?” She asked him. 

Landon nodded his head. Hope slowly inserted him into her and Landon’s mouth fell open and he moaned. This experience wasn’t something he was expecting at all. 

* * *

“Landon?” Landon’s eyes opened and the familiar voice gave him chills. “Hey, hey, you’re okay,” he felt hands on his face and the cloudy figure comes into his vision. He doesn’t know who it is yet but he knows he feels safe with them. “Oh my god, he’s so cold,” the girl cried. 

“Is he breathing?” Another asked. 

“Yeah but it’s faint,” the first said. “Landon, Landon,” she called out, lightly slapping his face. “Landon, it’s me. It’s me, it’s Hope,” Hope. Landon’s heart filled with happiness and the first time in god knows how long. 

“Hope,” he whispered almost inaudible. 

“Yeah, I’m right here, Lan,” Hope cried. “Josie! Call help! He’s bleeding really bad, I think his femur is broken but I can’t tell,” she said next. 

“Hope,” Landon whispered. 

“I’m right here, I’m not going anywhere,” she said. “Landon, stay with me, stay with me,” she added. 

“I remember,” Landon whispered. 

Hope looked at him confused. “What?” 

“The shower,” he said. 

Hope’s face fell and before she could respond, “Hope! The medics are on the way. Can you help him until then?” Josie asked, yelling from the top of the hill. 

“Uh, yeah. Yeah. I’m good,” she said. 

“I’m sorry,” Landon apologized. 

“Shh,” Hope whispered, touching his lips. “We’ll talk about this later okay?” She said softer. 

Landon nodded his head. “I remember,” he whispered. 

Hope Mikaelson, his best friend of twenty plus years —was his first everything and he didn’t even realize it until now. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hehe. You know what to do.


	7. loving you (is like a saving game)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hope drops some major news to Landon

Landon woke up in less pain than he was before — he still felt a little off in a way. He opened his eyes and didn’t recognize where he was for a second but then slowly realized that he was in a hospital bed and he was connected to a bunch of cords and such. He always hate hospitals, even has a kid. He could never get over them. 

He took a deep breath in and released it before shutting his eyes again and trying to get more sleep but the door opens. He opened his eyes and he really wanted it to be Hope but it was Declan instead. “Hey brother,” Declan said, stuffing his hands in his pockets as he walks over to his little bro. “If you feel like you look, I’m so sorry,” he joked. 

Landon chuckled weakly. “Thanks man. I appreciate the words of encouragement,” he coughed. 

Declan smiled softly as he scanned his little brother’s body. “You’ve been in and out for the last couple of days. The doctor said that today you will probably be back on a regular sleeping schedule though,” he said next. 

“What time is it?” Landon asked. 

“9:30 in the morning,” Declan answered as he pulled up a chair and sat down next to his brother’s bed. “You really had us worried man, you were gone for three days. I’m surprised you didn’t bleed to death,” he said next. 

Landon chuckled. “I thought I was going to die,” he said honestly as he closed his eyes. “It was so fucking cold and my leg was numb, I didn’t even know if it was there,” 

“Yeah thankfully it’s still there,” Declan said. “Uh, Dad’s coming. I told him not to but he refused to take no for an answer. He’s in Japan so he’s going to be here in a day or so,” he added and Landon groaned. “I know, bro but he wasn’t listening to me,” he finished. 

Landon leaned his head back. “I don’t want to see him, he’s literally the last person I want to see,” he added. Landon and his dad don’t get along at all. He wasn’t even there when Jack was born and that sucked for Landon. His dad also didn’t approve of him becoming a dad so young but Landon wanted it more than ever. And he wanted it with Josie. He also can’t get Hope out of his head. 

They had sex. 

They had sex in high school and he didn’t remember it. It’s been almost ten years and this entire time — his first time having sex was with Hope. She was his first everything. He looked like an idiot now. “Where’s Hope?” Landon asked. 

Declan shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know, bro. I haven’t seen her since they brought you here. It’s been two days,” his brother said, being completely honest with him. “What’s going on with you two?” He asked next. 

“We slept together,” Landon said. 

“It’s about time,” Declan smirked. 

“In high school,” Landon added and that’s when Declan’s smirk fell off his face and it filled with confusion. “We had sex in high school and I was so drunk off my mind that I didn’t remember it happening until this accident. It’s like being on the verge of death brought it back,” he said. 

Declan nodded. “Okay. What does this mean?” He asked. 

“It means that my best friend, a girl who I’ve never thought about sexually before, or so I thought, was my first time inside of a vagina,” he said smiling lightly. 

“Right,” Declan agreed. “But that’s not what I meant,” he said and Landon raised an eyebrow at him. “Does this mean you two are going to fuck again or—?” 

Landon shrugged. “I don’t know but all I know is that I can’t stop thinking about her,” he whispered. “I remember what it felt like to be with her that way and it was the best I’ve felt in a long time — we had sex once and even thought I was a virgin, I wasn’t nervous with her. I wasn’t scared. I was able to get it up without a pill.” He added. 

“True love prevails,” Declan smiled. “I don’t know dude. I mean, I can get someone to call her but she hasn’t been here in two days. Did you tell her you remember? Maybe she got scared and is afraid to come and talk to you about it. She might think you regretted it.” He said. 

Landon swallowed hard. “I care about her,” Landon said. Declan nodded his head. “Like I really do and thinking back to what happened between us just makes me realize that it was Hope all along. It was never Josie and while my relationship with her was amazing and we have an amazing son together — everything should’ve happened with her,” 

“I’m glad you’re finally realizing it,” he smirked. 

Landon sighed deeply as he leaned his head back and closed his eyes. “Can you call her? Try and get her here? I really want to talk to her while it’s fresh in my mind,” he asked. 

“Yeah man, I can try,” he said. 

Landon nodded his head. “Tell her that I’m not mad,” he whispered, tearing up at the thought. “Tell her that I love her and that I don’t blame her for not telling me,” he added. “Tell her I’m sorry for being a dick to her,” he added as he started to have a breakdown. He just wants to see Hope. 

Declan placed a hand on his leg. “Dude, it’s okay,” he said softly. “She will know okay. You don’t need to say sorry, she wouldn’t want you to apologize,” he said. 

A tear falls from Landon’s right eye as he shifted in his bed. “Can you get the doctor or nurse?” He asked in pain. 

Declan nodded his head before standing up. “Yeah, man. Give me a second okay,” he said before rushing over to the door and leaving the room. Landon really wished he had his phone right now. He wants to hear her voice. Hear her laugh. It’s what kept him alive out there. He just needs to see her. 

* * *

Hope is lying in bed looking out the large window of Ethan’s apartment and all that is on her mind right now is Landon. Which is awful because her boyfriend is sleeping right next to her. They had a wild night last night. But all Hope could think about while they were doing what they did was Landon remembering that they slept together in high school. 

How does a memory like that just come up? Was he thinking of her when he was dying? What causes something like that? She doesn’t know but she wants nothing more than to talk to him about it but he’ll be mad at her for not telling him. She took his virginity while he was drunk. That’s not something someone can forgive someone for. 

She doesn’t know what she would do if Landon hated her. Her life would be over. She couldn’t bear the pain. She felt a strong arm wrapped around her waist and then his lips pressing against her neck. Hope leaned into the touch because it comes naturally to her. “Morning,” Ethan hummed into her ear as he continued to kiss her. 

“Good morning,” Hope responded before turning onto her back and Ethan was hovering over top of her. She put a hand on his face and smiled softly. “Why are you so cute today?” Hope asked, chuckling slightly. 

Ethan shrugged. “It must be because of you,” he smiled. Hope chuckled and nodded her hand. “So I was thinking maybe going to go see my mom and Maya to tell them. Just so they aren’t shocked by the whole thing,” he suggested. 

“Today?” Hope asked. 

Ethan nodded his head. “Yeah. I think they deserve to know since we decided this before telling anyone,” he said and Hope nodded her head. “And we can then go to the hospital and tell Landon so you can see him,” she said.

Hope shrugged. “I’m not so sure that’s a good idea,” 

“Why? Because he remembers?” Ethan asked. Hope doesn’t keep anything from Ethan. She doesn’t want to have any secrets between them. So she told him before he found out from someone else. But assured him that nothing will happen because Landon doesn’t feel that way about her. 

Hope licked her lips. “Because he’s recovering and I don’t want to put any strain on him,” she said, rubbing her thumb against his cheek. “We can go see your mom and Maya and then we can go to Vermont to ski and have a couples weekend like you said we could,” she smiled. “To celebrate,” she added as Ethan smiled and nodded his head. 

“Okay,” He agreed before leaning in and kissing her. She tangled her hand on his hair and deepened it. But before it could go anywhere else, her phone started to ring. She looked over at the night stand before reaching over and picking it up and looking at the name on the screen. Why is he calling her? He never calls her. 

**_Declan Kirby_ **

Ethan saw it and nodded his head before leaning down and kissing her cheek and then getting up off the bed to go take a shower. Hope sighed deeply and sat up on the bed and swiped her thumb across the screen and put it to her ear. “Hello?” She said, wiping her face. 

“ _ Hey sweet cheek, _ ” Declan’s deep voice greeted her. 

“I didn’t expect you to be the one to call me,” Hope said as she stood up off the bed and walked over to the window and looked out of it. “Did he ask you to call me?” She asked. 

“ _ You know the answer to that, _ ” he said. 

“Look Dec, I’m busy,” she said, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Tell him that I’m sorry that I can’t make it for at least another four days or so, Ethan and I are going on a vacation to get away from the chaos,” she said. 

“ _ You two aren’t going to talk about the fact that you fucked and he remembers it? _ ” Declan asked. 

Hope sighed. “He told you,” 

“ _ He’s my little brother, Hope, _ ” Declan said. “ _ And he misses you and wants to talk to you,”  _ he said next. 

“Declan, I am busy,” she said. 

“ _ He told me to tell you that he’s not mad at you,”  _ he started and that caught Hope’s attention. “ _ And that he loves you and is sorry for not remembering it happening,”  _ he said next. 

Hope lets out a shaky sigh before running her hand through her hair. “I can’t see him, Declan. I can’t look at him right now,” she cried softly. 

“ _ He cares about you, sweetheart,”  _ Declan said.  _ “I don’t think I’ve ever seen him care about someone like he does you. He even said that he knows now, that everything that happened with Josie, it should’ve been done with you,”  _ he said. 

“He didn’t say that,” she said. 

Declan chuckled.  _ “Hope, I don’t lie,”  _ he said.  _ “Landon loves you, more than friends,”  _ he said. “ _ And I know it took him a long time to realize it because he’s fucking stupid but he happened and now there’s no turning back because when Landon loves something, he will fight to make sure that it loves him back,”  _ he reminded her. 

Hope sighed deeply before letting the tears fall. “It’s too late, Dec,” hope stated softly. 

“ _ It’s never too late, baby girl, _ ” he said. 

“It is in this case,” she whispered before shutting her eyes. “Landon and I can’t happen,” she added. 

“ _ Why not? _ ” Declan asked. 

Hope looked down at her hand, and sighed deeply. “Because,” she whispered. “Ethan and I eloped last night,” 

* * *

**_Four Days Later….._ **

Hope is unpacking her bag from her “honeymoon” in Vermont with her husband. She told Declan and begged him not to tell Landon. She wanted to tell him herself but was afraid on how to approach it. 

She knows that Landon should be out of the hospital now and is probably living on the couch because he can’t walk up the steps with that case and crutches. 

After she packed all of her clothes away in the dresser at Ethan’s apartment, she walked over to her nightstand and opened the drawer and grabbed her phone. They both agreed to not bring their phones on the trip and have a nice weekend as newlyweds. 

What made Hope decide to marry him? She does really know but what she does know is that being married or at least newly married is amazing. All they did this weekend was have sex and skied. It was the best weekend ever. 

Ethan is already talking about starting a family and so they haven’t been using a condom. She knows she wants a family but is afraid of the consequences that come with it. But she loves Ethan and would love for him to be the father of her kids. But she can’t stop thinking about Landon either. 

She glanced down at her phone and watched it turn on before a couple of messages popped up on her screen. One from Dec and several from….

**_Lan🥰_ **

Hope took a deep breath in and released before opening the messages up and looking at them. 

**_Lan🥰 (FRIDAY 12:30AM):_ ** Hi gorgeous. I hope everything is okay with you. My brother said you were going away for the weekend and I just want to make sure we could see each other when you get back to talk about what I said when you found me. 

**_Lan🥰 (SATURDAY 4:45AM):_ ** I know you probably don’t have your phone on or you’re just avoiding the conversation but I’m going to text everyday until you agree to see me. 

**Lan🥰 (SUNDAY 2:36AM):** I haven’t been sleeping well recently, since the accident and I always used to go to you for those head scratches when I could and you’re not here at the apartment and it’s really showing now. I miss you, Hope. It’s not the same without you here and I know that you’re avoiding me now because you usually answer but you’re not and it’s scaring me. I know we slept together and I know I forgot it after the fact but you were my first time, Hope. I need to talk to you about it, please? 

**_Lan🥰:_ ** I love you so much. 

Hope took a deep breath in and released before rubbing her scalp, trying to get away all the negative thoughts in her head. She needs to go over there and give him answers. She has to. She can’t avoid this conversation any longer. It’s not fair to Landon and it’s not fair to her either. She knows that. 

She stood up from the bed and put her phone in her back pocket before walking over and grabbing her suitcase. She needs to bring a few things from the apartment to Ethan’s place since she’s moving in with him. This isn’t going to end well in her part at all. 

* * *

Hope walked up to the door of her and Landon’s apartment and she felt her heart beating against her chest. She stopped in front of it and looked at it. She was ready for this but her body was stopping her for some reason. She doesn’t know what it is but she couldn’t open that door for a second. She couldn’t do it. She knows she has to but she won’t. 

She took a deep breath in and released before grabbing her key from her pocket and pushing it into the slot and then she pushed the door open. The television was on and her eyes landed on the couch. Landon quickly turned the television off and stood up, hopping on one leg. Hope slowly closed the door and eyed him down and then looking at the messy living area. “I see you made yourself comfortable,” Hope whispered as she put the suitcase near the door. 

Landon chuckled and looked around the place. “Yeah,” he muttered as he scratched the back of his head. “I can’t exactly climb up the steps with my leg and the crutches so Declan helped me bring some of my stuff down until I’m able to do so,” he said, smiling softly. Hope rubbed her arms up and down as she walked over to him slowly. “I see you’re finally back from vacation,” he said. 

“Yeah,” Hope nodded her head awkwardly. 

“Where did you go?” He asked. 

Hope swallowed hard. “Uh, Ethan and I went to Vermont, to ski,” she said softly and Landon nodded his head. “He’s always wanted to go and we were just kind of in the mood to get out of town, you know? Away from the chaos,” she said next as she stopped a few feet in front of him. 

“By chaos you mean us?” Landon asked and Hope didn’t respond. Why is it so hard to talk to him now? It was so much better when he didn’t know they had sex. “I didn’t think I was something you needed to run away from,” he said. 

“Landon,” Hope whispered, tilting her head to the ground, shaking it and that’s when Landon pouted. Landon was wobbling around right now and Hope noticed. “Can you please sit down? You’re making me nervous,” she asked kindly. Landon hesitated a little bit then sat himself down on the couch which had his bedsheets on them and his comforter spread out on it. “I wasn’t running away from you” she said as she walked over and sat down next to him. 

“It seems like you’ve been avoiding the conversation, Hope,” Landon whispered as he looked her dead in the eyes. “I’ve been texting you the last couple of days and you haven’t been responding. I got worried,” he said truthfully. 

Hope sighed deeply. “We decided to keep our phone at the house while we were away. I didn’t see your messages until I got home today,” she stated honestly. 

“Okay, so, can we have the conversation now or are you going to avoid that too?” He asked. 

Hope licked her lips nervously. “There’s not a lot to talk about, Lan, it was ten years ago,” she said. 

“Not much to talk—are you crazy? There’s a shit ton to talk about, Hope. How about the fact that you’ve been lying to me for ten years?” He asked. 

“I thought you weren’t mad?” Hope asked. 

“I’m not mad that we had sex, Hope,” Landon said, scooting closer to her. “I’m mad that you thought I couldn’t handle the truth after it happened,” he said next. Hope stared into his green eyes and didn’t say anything. “Listen,” he grabbed ahold of her hand and cupped it with his. “I’m happy I remember okay? I don’t care how I remembered it, all I care about is that I do and now we can give it a shot. Right? You and I,” he said smiling. “We’re each other’s epic loves,” he added with a soft chuckle. “Handon for life,” he added. 

Hope chuckled at that last part before letting a tear fall from her eye. “Landon,” she whispered before pulling her hand away from his. Landon’s face dropped softly. “You’re my best friend okay? I love you so much and yes, in high school I was in love with you,” she admitted. “I was in love with you and I took the opportunity to have sex with the man that I love but—,” she paused and looked into his green eyes once again. She’s really about to do this. “But what I did was wrong,” she added. 

“Hope I don’t—,” 

“I took your virginity, Lan. I took it without you’re sober consent that’s why a part of me never wanted you to find out. Because it was wrong,” she said truthfully. Landon felt a tear fall down his cheek. “And I’ll say this next part with so much honesty and love that I can without breaking your heart okay? Because I love you so much,” she cried. 

“If you love me then give me a change to prove to you that I’m in this a hundred percent,” Landon said, cradling her face with one of his hands softly. “Let me price to you that I’m worthy of your love and that you’re worthy of mine,” 

Hope swallowed. “If it had been a couple of weeks earlier, Landon.” She whispered. “I’d be kissing you right now,” she added with a chuckle. 

Landon smiled. “Kiss me,” he said. 

Hope shook her head, biting down on her lip. “I can’t,” she whispered. “I can’t cheat on Ethan,” he added. 

“Doesn’t he know? That it’s always going to be us? Hope and Landon, always and forever,” he whispered. 

Hope was finding it hard to say the words to him. She doesn’t want to see the heartbreak in his eyes. “If only this happened a few weeks earlier,” Hope whispered. She took a deep breath in and released before lightly whisper. “I can’t cheat on my husband, Landon,” 

Landon’s face fell. “Husband?” He whispered. 

That’s the reaction Hope didn’t want. Her lip quivered but she quickly recovered as she nodded her head. “Yeah,” she mumbled softly. 

“What do you mean husband?” Landon asked roughly. 

Hope tightened her lips and nodded her head. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. She kept repeating that to herself. “Ethan and I got married last Thursday,” she whispered and Landon’s face filled with sadness and disbelief. “He asked me and then a couple of hours later we were at the courthouse and we standing in front of a judge and then we just eloped,” she said casually as she stared at him. 

Landon huffed. “You can’t be—you’re—,” he stuttered and that broke Hope’s heart. “You were just— we were just—,” he started to freak out. 

“Landon, I’m sorry,” she whispered. 

“We had sex,” Landon said. 

“In high school,” Hope stated. 

“But—,” he started to cry even more as he took his hand from hers. Hope felt a tear stream down her cheek as she looked at him with a straight face. “I just remembered it,” he stated. “It wasn’t in high school for me, Hope. It’s happening to be right now and you’re telling me that you’re married?” 

“Landon,” 

“No, you can’t be married, we’re supposed to end up together. We’re supposed to be the happy ending that everyone talks about. We’re supposed to be the best friends turned soulmates,” he cried. Hope let out a sad sigh as she covered her mouth with her hand. “You—you—you can’t be—be married,” Landon chuckled sadly. 

“I’m sorry,” she whispered. 

Landon started to full on cry, like weeping. He missed his chance. He missed his only chance. He fucked it up like he always does. He fucks everything up. “I’m asking you to pick me, Hope,” he whispered. “Pick me? Pick me?” He begged as he grabbed her face with his strong hands. Hope didn’t budge, she just let him do what he needed to do. “I love you so much and I’m sorry that it took me so long to realize it but please let me prove to you that I’m the guy that can make you happy. Please! Please!” He begged. 

Hope didn’t respond. She didn’t know how to. She doesn’t know how to let him down easily. It hard doing that to your best friend — the first guy you fell in love with. How do you do it without breaking his heart? “I’m sorry. I can’t,” she said as she grabbed his hands and removed them from her face. Landon’s heart broke more. “I’m happy with him, Landon. For the first time in a long time. I’m happy without you,” 

“I don’t want you to be happy without me,” he cried. 

“I’m sorry,” she whispered as she slowly stood up, he quickly did as well. “I came here to get some of my stuff. I’m moving in with Ethan because I choose him,” she said. 

“Hope,” Landon begged. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t see it sooner but I’m begging you, don’t leave,” he asked. 

Hope let out a shaky sigh. “You have no idea how fucking hard this is, Landon Kirby,” she whispered. 

“Then don’t make it hard, stay with me,” he begged. 

Hope tilted her head back as she sighed. “I’ve got to go,” she said as she wiped underneath her eyes. “I’ll come and get my stuff later when you’re not here or something,” she added as she turned towards the door. 

“Hope,” Landon called out as he chased her, hopping on one foot. “Hope, stop please,” he begged again. Hope quickly grabbed the door and left, she couldn’t deal with the pain anymore. She hurt him, just like he hurt her. She rejected him just like he rejected her. How is this happening right now? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I won’t be able to post until Wednesday/Thursday next week but I will post it then if this gets 20 comments instead of 10 since it’s a longer waiting period. Sorry for the ending


	8. all i want (is a love that last)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> four years later.....landon and hope lay eyes on each other.

**_Four Years Later…._ **

Growing up, all Hope has ever wanted was a family of her own. To have a baby with her husband and make a living saving lives. But she never thought it would be so hard to make happen. While trying to have a baby is fun, getting pregnant was the hard part for Hope. Ethan and her tried for years. They did and they always fell short. But about a little over a year ago, it was successful and she had learned she was carrying a baby boy. 

She was thrilled and couldn’t wait to start this journey. She wanted to tell the one person the most but they hadn’t talked since they night in their apartment. Which is surprising because going a day without talking was difficult for Hope and him when they were close. She wanted him to be the first to learn that she was going to be a mom. 

She gave birth to a baby boy, Archer Machado. Archie for short. That little boy was Hope’s light, the start of a new life but with her luck, everything went crumbling down. Ethan has decided that army medical is where he belonged. They moved to Germany where he was stationed and he had done two tours before Hope had gotten pregnant with Archie but had been sent on his third when Archie was two months old — two months later, he stepped on a land mine as he was trying to get to someone who was injured and he never made it home to Hope or Archie. 

Hope’s been living with MG and Lizzie since they happened. They don’t have any kids yet themselves so they’ve been taking in Archie has their own since Hope is on her residency at the local hospital. “Thank you again for watching him,” Hope thanked MG as she handed six month old baby Archie to him. 

MG smiled down at the little guy. “Of course, Hope. You don’t have to keep thanking us. We love doing it. I’m trying to convince my wife to let us have one,” MG said making faces at Archie as the six month old. 

“Not happening,” Lizzie came up from behind and kissed MG’s cheek before looking at her best friend. “You need to get to work missy, go we can handle him,” she said. 

Hope smiled and gathered all her stuff. “Thank you,” she mouthed before leaning down and kissing Archie’s cheek. “Bye buddy. Mommy loves you,” she said again before she rushed out the front door and into the warm weather of Los Angeles. Being a mom is amazing but not having her husband by her side is difficult to say the least. She doesn’t know how to do this by herself. And now, she’ll be at the hospital for the next 24 hours. Without her baby boy and those shifts are always the hardest for her. 

She took a deep breath in and released before starting her car. She drove to the hospital in peace. She loves who she works with but it’s not the same without Ethan by her side. They went through medical school together. It’s different going through the actual stuff without him. 

She was running a little late so she quickly gathered her stuff, held out her ID as she ran through security and headed towards the elevator. “Dr. Mikaelson,” Hope turned at the sound of her name and saw Dr. Elena Salvatore, head of the hospital. Her boss basically. “I’ll need to see you in my office after rounds,” she said. 

Hope’s heart stopped. Why? “Yes ma’am,” Hope said. Elena gave her a weak smile before continuing on her way. Great, is she getting fired? She’s only been here for two months. 

She exited the elevator was greeted by an excited voice. “It’s about damn time you got here!” Maya Machado, Ethan’s twin sister shouted into Hope’s ear from behind. They became extremely close after Ethan passed away and Hope got her a job as a secretary here. 

Hope jumped. “Oh my god don’t do that,” she yelled. 

“You won’t guess what I did, or well who I did,” she smiled in awe as she followed Hope into the resident locker room so Hope could get changed into her scrubs. 

“I won’t but I have a feeling you’re going to tell me,” Hope said as she tore her shirt off and quickly put her scrubs on. 

“Allie, from pediatrics,” she smiled in awe as she sat down on the bench. “Sex with girls is so much easier and so much more pleasure full,” she added thinking back at it as she bit down on her lip seductively. 

Hope unbuttoned her jeans and quickly took them off. “That’s great, Maya,” Hope said plainly. 

Maya noticed a change in Hope’s demeanor since Ethan died, she knows she’s hurting but Ethan wouldn’t have wanted her to be like this. “So what about you?” She asked as she crossed her legs. “Any dick?” She asked. 

Hope rolled her eyes. “No, and there won’t be for a while,” she said as she slipped on her tennis shoes. 

“Because of Ethan?” Maya asked. 

“Because I just had a baby six months ago and down there isn’t the most pleasant at the moment,” She said as she stood up and fixed her shirt. “And my husband died two months ago, I’m not ready to move on from that,” she added. 

“He wouldn’t want you to wait because of him, Hope,” Maya said as Hope walked passed her and exited the locker room. She followed behind her quickly. “And Archie would need a fatherly figure in his life,” she added. 

“Archie is fine with just me,” Hope said as she walked over to the nurses counter and grabbed her rounds paperwork. 

“What about the guy from high school?” Maya asked. 

“Which one?” Hope said. 

“Right, I forgot you were a player,” she smirked. Hope rolled her eyes and flicked her off. “The best friend you had sex with then didn’t tell him the morning after,” she said. 

Hope knew who she was talking about and was hoping she wouldn’t say anything about it but that wasn’t the case. “Landon and I are complicated and I haven’t seen him in four years since I told him Ethan and I were married,” she said. 

“Was he good?” Maya asked. 

“What?” Hope questioned. 

“Was his dick good?” She clarified. 

She groaned in frustration. “I’m not talking to you about my sex life anymore,” she said shaking her head and Maya gave her a look, Hope rolled her eyes. “He was perfect because I was in love with him. It was his first time so the sex wasn’t the best but it happened and it was with him,” she said. 

“He was your first love,” Maya stated. “My brother was intended to be your last but there’s always room for another last, Hope,” she added. 

“I haven’t seen him in fours, Maya,” Hope stated. “He told me he was finally ready to have a relationship with me but I had already married your brother,” she added. “He wasn’t fighting for me and I don’t intend to fight for him,” she finished before opening the door to her first patient. 

* * *

Hope finished up her runs and then rushed to Dr. Salvatore’s office quickly. She doesn’t know what she needs to talk to her about but she’s super nervous too. Hope smiled at everyone as she passed them and then knocked on the office door before she heard, “come in,” and then she grabbed the door knob and walked in. Elena was on the phone with someone. “Okay, baby. I have to go. I’ll talk to you tonight,” she smiled and she motioned Hope to sit down so Hope sits herself down on the chair across from the desk. “Stefan, I have to go,” she giggled. 

Stefan Salvatore is her husband, they just recently got married. He’s an owner of a boarding school or something. He’s a really nice guy. “Bye baby,” Elena made a kissing Josie into the phone before hanging it up. “Sorry about that, he doesn’t know how to stop talking,” she smiled as she opened up her laptop in front of her. Hope gave her a weak smile. “Okay, so before we get started, I want to state that you’re not in trouble or anything,” Elena said. Hope let out a sigh in relief which made Elena chuckle. “And I want to ask you how you’ve been doing,” she added. 

Hope gave her a weak smile and shrugged. “I’ve been okay, I guess. I don’t know, working is a way to get stuff off my mind you know,” she said truthfully. 

Elena nodded her head. “And how is your son? Archie is his name correct?” She asked. Hope’s face lights up at the sound of her son’s name and she nodded her head. “Six months, that’s a beautiful age, is he sleeping through the night? My son didn’t sleep a lick when he was that age,” Elena chuckled with a large smile. 

“He’s a blessing,” Hope responded. 

Elena smirked. “That’s good to hear,” she added before taking a deep breath in and releasing. “So while it’s fun to chat about that kind of stuff, I have to keep you up to date on everything that is going on, involving your name because it’s been brought up several times at board meetings,” she said honestly as she typed away at the computer. 

“My name?” Hope questioned with a whisper. “Why is my name being brought up at medical board meetings?” 

Elena looked at Hope’s face and could see the panic in her eyes. “Hope, remember. I told you you weren’t in trouble and I meant it,” she said before grabbing a piece of paper from the pile on her desk and slid it over to Hope. “As you know, our head of pediatrics retired last week,” she said. 

Hope nodded her head. “Yeah, Dr. Hammel, she was a great surgeon,” Hope said as she looked down at the paper. “What is this?” She asked, not understanding what’s going on. 

Elena smiled. “The board and I have decided to give the position to you, if you would like,” she said. 

Her eyes widened. “Me? What—why me? I’m only—I only just—,” Hope was lost for words. 

“You’re dedicated, amazing with the patients especially the kids and you know how to do right and when something is wrong, I also believe you have the potential to be something as amazing as Hammel was,” Elena explained. “Of course, this would mean longer shifts and such but it also means you get a few more days off a month that you can spend with baby Archie,” she added. 

“Uh—,” Hope took a deep breath in. “When—uh—when would I start?” She asked in a soft whisper. 

“Today,” Elena said and Hope’s breath hitches her throat. “And don’t worry, you will he only doing your 24 hour shift instead of a regular 48 that heads do,” she said. 

“Benefits?” Hope questioned. 

Elena chuckled. “A lot more than what you’re getting now,” she said as she handed Hope another sheet. “Look, Hope. The board trusts you and so do I, I think this would work well in your favor,” she said. 

“Okay,” Hope said softly. 

“So you’ll do it?” Elena asked. 

“It this shift like a trail?” Hope asked. 

“Do you want it to be?” Elena asked as she reached behind her desk and pulled out a lab coat. “Because I had this made for you,” she added as she handed it to Hope. Hope opened it up and looked at the labeling on the left shoulder.

**Hope A. Mikaelson M.D.**

**Head of Pediatrics**

She couldn’t help but smile at it. “I’ll do it,” she whispered. 

Elena smiled. “Good,” she said. “I think this is going to be amazing start to your career, Dr. Mikaelson,” 

* * *

Hope walked out of the office with her new jacket on and a huge smile on her face. This is happening, she chuckled as she walked passed a bunch of people. She’s the head of a department, this is actually happening. She made her way to the pediatrics unit and introduced herself to a bunch of people and they all greeted her with respect and so much more. She couldn’t help but be excited for the journey ahead. 

“Dr. Mikaelson?” She heard as she was filling out paperwork, so she looked up and saw an intern making her way to her. “Uh, there’s a young couple with a two month old baby girl in room 234 — they said that the baby is having trouble breathing and they want the head of the department, I’m pretty sure they want Hammel but no one told them that she retired,” she said handing her the folder. 

Hope took a deep breath in and released. “I’ll handle it, thank you, Sam,” she said before finishing up the paperwork and handing it to the nurse. Hope quickly rushed off to the room as she opened the folder and looked at the name on the file. She knocked on the door and then grabbed doorknob before reading the name. “Rosie Park—,” Hope stopped when she saw who it was. She didn’t expect to see them. “Oh,” Hope mumbled as she saw Penelope and Josie. 

They have a kid together now. “Hope,” Penelope sat up straight and Josie looked at her confused as she held the two month old in her arms. 

“Auntie Hope!” Hope felt a body collide with her, she looked down and saw a bunch of curly brown hair. Jack. Her arms automatically wrapped around his shoulders. He is almost as tall as her now. What the hell is going on? “Mom, it’s Auntie Hope!” Jack exclaimed as he hugged her tighter. 

Josie smiled. “I can see that, Jack,” 

Jack pulled away and Hope looked down at him. “I didn’t think I would ever see you again!” Jack smiled excitedly. 

“Uh,” Hope chuckled, fixing his hair. “Me either, sweetheart,” she smiled widely. Hope couldn’t help but be stunned at the resemblance between Jack and Landon. It’s crazy. Jack is what, 10 now? So he’s definitely going to look like Landon when he gets older. “Gosh you look so much like your dad,” Hope whispered as she looked at him. “And what the hell! I told you not to grow anymore,” she added. 

“Mom said I’m going to be taller than dad,” Jack smiled. 

“Trust me kiddo, that won’t take much,” Hope smiled before looking over at Penelope and Josie. “Uh, so — I know you guys had Dr. Hammel but she retired last week,” she explained as she moved passed Jack, ruffling his hair first and then grabbing a chair and pulling it front of Josie. “I’m the new head of pediatrics here,” she added. 

“Why didn’t anyone tell us?” Penelope asked. 

Hope shrugged. “I don’t know, I can’t tell you. I just learned about it as well,” she said. “But I promise you, I know what I’m doing and I’ve been preparing myself for anything that comes my way.” She assured them. 

“This ain’t like a conflict of interest?” Josie asked. 

Hope looked at the baby and smiled before shaking her head. “If it was Jack, probably because I’ve known him most of his life but this little one, I’ve just met so now I can get to know her as her doctor, not anything else,” Hope said. Josie pouted and nodded her head as she looked at her daughter. “So do you want to explain to me what’s going on?” Hope asked as she stood up and grabbed a pair of gloves. 

Penelope sighed deeply. “We uh we started to try and get her to sleep without us,” she said. “But she won’t sleep and when she does sleep, you can tell she’s having trouble breathing,” she explained. Hope could see Josie holding onto her tightly. “And she cries all the time,” she added. “At first I didn’t really think much of it but last night, she didn’t sleep at all,” Penelope explained next. 

“It was really loud,” Jack said. 

Hope laughed and nodded her head. “Can I see her?” She asked, as she leaned down to pick her up. Josie shut her eyes and nodded as Hope reached and grabbed the baby girl by the head and lower back. Rosie started to cry hysterically when she was ripped from Josie. “Hi baby girl, oh no,” she said in a high pitched voice as she carried her over to bed and laid her down carefully on her back. 

Josie hopes off the edge of the bed and Penelope stands there and watches. Jack hugged his mom’s side as Hope did what she needed to do. Hope carefully unbuttoned the infants onesie and then put her stethoscope into her ears and then pushed it up onto her chest, giving her heart and lungs a listen while she breathed. The two moms stood there waiting patiently. Hope automatically knew what was going on after listening to her right lung. “As she been coughing?” Hope asked. 

“Yeah,” Josie responded. Hope nodded her head as she to her stethoscope around her neck and then buttoned up the onesie and picked the baby girl up. “Why? Is there something wrong?” She asked her, worriedly. 

Hope smiled. “From the looks of it, she might have pneumonia,” Hope said. “I can hear liquid in her right lung,” she said as she handed the baby girl off to her mom. Josie looked down at her with a frown. “I will need to order a chest scan just in case to make sure there is actually an issue but if that’s the case, some medication and antibiotics should help her breath and she should be sleeping,” she said. 

“How is pneumonia caused?” Penelope asked. 

Hope took a deep breath in. “Bacteria, viruses, etc. she probably caught it from someone around you or something in the air. It’s common.” Hope stated. “The infection causes inflammation in the air sacs in your lungs, which are called alveoli. The alveoli fill with fluid or pus, making it difficult to breathe,” she explained next. “But you did the right thing bringing her in because now we can treat it,” she added. 

“How long will the chest scan take?” Penelope asked next. 

“Pen,” Josie whispered. 

“I have to get to work, babe,” Penelope said. 

“She’s your daughter, they will understand. Call them and tell them you’ll be late,” Josie fought back. 

Jack looked a little upset and Hope could see it. Most likely because Josie and Penelope fight a lot in front of him. “Uh, it shouldn’t take that long. I can put a rush on it.” Hope said. “But she will need it today,” she added. 

Penelope shut her eyes and sighed. “Okay, uh—we have to get you to school though sir,” she said, pointing to Jack. 

“Isn’t daddy coming to pick me up?” Jack asked and Hope’s heart stopped at the sound of that. “Auntie Hope, you can see daddy again, he misses you,” he added as he jumped up and down before attacking Hope in a hug. 

Josie looked at Hope’s face and could see the uncomforted. “I had to call him so he could watch Jack while we’re here,” Josie explained to Hope. 

She nodded her head in understanding. “It’s okay. I understand, uh Jack, why don’t you come with me and I’ll get you a snack,” she suggested. Jack smiled and nodded his head. “You guys will need to be checked in, I’ll get a nurse to come in and help the little on get settled in and I’ll be right back with this one,” she said, playing with his hair. 

They headed towards the door and Hope grabbed the doorknob. “Wait Hope,” Penelope called after her. Hope turned around and looked at her. “How’s Ethan?” She asked. Hope’s heart stopped. “I noticed you’re not wearing your wedding band,” she pointed out. 

“Babe,” Josie whispered. 

Penelope shrugged. “It’s just a question,” 

Hope chuckled, nervously. “It’s complicated,” she whispered. “We should probably get going,” she said as she put her arm around Jack’s shoulders and led him out of the room. 

Jack couldn’t help but contain his excitement about seeing Hope again. He just kept talking and talking about everything that he’s been up to the last couple of years. Hope promised him many presents for his eleventh birthday since she missed so many birthdays. “Daddy has his own record label now,” Jack said as Hope and him sat down at a table in the cafe in the hospital. 

Hope smiled at that -- Landon as always wanted to own one. “Really? That’s awesome buddy,” Hope said. 

“Yeah, it’s called Ocean Records,” Jack said as he took a bite into his cookie. Hope’s heart stopped at that, did he really name a record label, HIS record label, after her? Or was it just something he had always wanted to call it because he always called her ocean. “He doesn’t have any full time artists yet but he’s working on it,” he added. 

“Well that’s great for him,” Hope said. 

“Why don’t you and daddy hang out anymore?” he asked. 

Hope didn’t respond right away. How is she supposed to answer a question like that. “Uh, it’s a complicated situation, sweetheart.” Hope said. “You know how Uncle Ethan and I were together?” She asked him and Jack nodded his head. “Well we decided to get married and your daddy wasn’t the biggest fan of that,” she added. 

“Because he wanted to marry you,” Jack said. 

Hope smiled at that. “You are really mature for your age you know?’ she said. 

Jack shrugged. “I always thought you and daddy would end up getting married and have another baby like mommy did with Penelope,” he said. “I want a brother, don’t get me wrong I love Rosie because she’s my little sister but I want a brother who will play baseball with me and hang out with daddy and I,” he said. 

Hope smiled. “That’s something your daddy or mommy will have to give you, sweetheart,” 

Jack nodded his head. “I know but can’t daddy have my brother with you since you and Uncle Ethan aren’t together anymore?” he asked as he finished his cookie. 

“If only you knew how complicated it is,” Hope laughed. 

“Don’t you love him?” Jack asked. 

Hope sighed deeply. “Of course I do, honey but your dad and I have this kind of relationship that is hard to explain, especially to a ten year old,” she said honestly. 

“He hasn’t dated anyone since mommy, he’s sad a lot,” he said. That broke Hope’s heart hearing that, she never wanted to hurt him. “I’m all he has since you and him don’t talk anymore,” he added. 

“I’m sorry about that,” Hope said, giving him a weak smile. 

“It’s okay,” he shrugged his shoulders and then a huge smile fell on his face as he looked over her shoulder. “Daddy!” he exclaimed, Hope’s heart dropped and she looked over her shoulder as Jack ran to his dad. Hope stood up to get a clear view of her old friend. He had a beard and his hair was longer.

He definitely looked like he was at a hard point in his life. Jack hugged his dad’s waist as Landon looked at Hope, his eyes were filled with anger and betrayal but she understood. “Daddy, Auntie Hope is Rosie’s doctor,” Jack said jumping up and down as he hugged his dad. 

“I can see that, kiddo,” he said softly. 

“Her and uncle Ethan aren’t together anymore, you can finally be happy again,” Jack said. 

Landon shut his eyes and sighed. “That’s not how that works, Jack,” he said. Hope stood there awkwardly before her pager went off, Rosie’s x-ray is ready. 

“I have to go,” Hope said. “Jack, you be good for you mom and dad okay,” she said as she walked over to him and gave him a hug and kissed the top of his head. 

“Will I see you again?” Jack asked. 

Hope glanced up at Landon and he didn’t even make eye contact with her. “Uh, I don’t know. Maybe. I’m staying with Auntie Lizzie and Uncle MG so maybe you will,” she added. 

He smiled widely. “Okay! Me, you and daddy can do another puzzle night one time,” he said. 

Hope nodded her head. “Maybe,” she looked at Landon. “I better get going,” she said, Landon didn’t even respond. “Right,” she whispered before kissing Jack’s head again and then pushing passed Landon, her shoulder touched his and he didn’t even flinch at it. He’s really mad at her. And she can’t blame him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you know what to do.


	9. (you can) lean on me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Landon is always there for Hope

After running into Landon, Hope couldn’t wait to get home and see her son. He always manages to put a smile on her face. Hope quickly got into her car after her shortened twenty four hour shift and let out a huge sigh. Landon didn’t even look her in the eyes. He’s really that upset with her. He looked so different since the last time she saw him yet she still feels more attracted to him in any way. She can’t even get him out of her mind now she’s seen him again. 

She had to cool herself off for a second before turning her car on and heading out of the parking lot. Hope didn’t know what to say to Jack when he asked if they would see each other again. Obviously that’s not going to happen since Landon can barely stand being in close proximity to her. It’s annoying because he is her godson. He’s gotten so big. It makes her emotional thinking that Archie is going to be that big sooner or later and that Archie is probably her only kid. 

She drove down the coast and the sun hits her face nicely. She loves the drive down the coast to get back to the house that Lizzie and MG live in. She loves rolling her window down and smelling the scents from the ocean. It’s her favorite part of the day. When she pulled up to the gated community and greeted Robert, the gatekeeper, she noticed a different car in their driveway. She parked in the street and gathered her things before heading up the driveway. 

She went through the garage that led straight into the kitchen where Lizzie was already making breakfast. Hope closed the door and looked around. “Who’s car is in the driveway?” Hope asked as she took her jacket off. 

“Uh—,” Lizzie looked over her shoulder. “My—uh—my sister made a surprise visit,” she said. Hope’s heart stopped. “She’s in the living room with MG,” she said. 

“Where’s Archie?” Hope asked. 

“With them,” Lizzie added nervously. Hope sighed deeply and her hands fell to her forehead. “I didn’t tell her about Ethan or anything. But she knows that he’s yours because there’s no chance in hell he’s mine and Milton’s.” She said. 

“Did she ask any questions?” Hope asked as she placed her stuff on the counter and wanting to go grab her son. Lizzie shook her head. “Good, because the last thing I need is for her to go off and tell Landon anything,” she added. 

Hope made her way to the living room where Josie and MG were, sitting on the couch talking. Hope walked in and Josie looked up and MG did as well. Hope looked at baby Archie as he rested in Josie’s arms, sleeping. “Hey,” Josie smiled. 

Hope’s hands were sweating. She didn’t want them to find out like this. She didn’t want this. It’s not that she wanted to keep Archie a secret, she didn’t want anyone to find out about Ethan. Especially Landon. “Hi,” Hope whispered. 

Josie looked down at Archie. “He looks like you,” she said. Hope gave her a weak smile. “But I can see that he’ll grow up to look like his father, like Jack did,” she added. 

“Yeah, I’m hoping that too,” Hope whispered. 

Josie nodded her head. “So this is what you’ve been doing the last four years?” She joked with a laugh. 

“Part of it,” Hope nodded her head. 

Josie looked down at him and smiled softly. “You know when I had Rosie, all I wanted to do was tell my family and my friends,” she said next. Hope knew exactly where this was going. “Why didn’t you tell us, Hope?” She asked. 

Hope sighed deeply. “Do you know what happened with Landon and I before we stopped talking?” Hope asked. Josie nodded her head. “I hated that I hurt him, Jo. I fucking hated it — seeing that I hurt him like he hurt me,” she added. “But I was happy,” she said, choking up. “Ethan made me happy because he chose me,” she added. 

“Made?” Josie questioned. 

Hope let out a shaky sigh, shaking her head. “Archie is my life, Josie,” she whispered. “He’s my baby boy, a part of me and he’s a part of Ethan. He’s the only part of Ethan I have left,” she added softly. 

“What happened?” She asked. 

Hope took a deep breath in and reached for her son. Josie carefully handed him to her and she adjusted him in her arms before glancing down at him. “Ethan and I tried for years before I got pregnant with him,” Hope whispered. “He was so excited he was going to be a dad and that he was a boy,” Hope looked up at Josie with watery eyes. “I was finally getting my happy ending,” she added. 

“What changed?” Josie whispered. 

“My husband died,” she said. Josie’s face fell. “He decided to join the army,” she whispered. “And on his third tour, died in a bombing accident,” she added. “And now I’m left, raising a six month old by myself,” she continued. 

“We would’ve been there for you—Landon would’ve been there for you,” she added. 

“He hates me, Jo,” she said. 

“He’s miserable without you,” Josie said. “Look, one of the main reasons why I came here was because Landon told me you were staying with my sister and I needed to talk to you.” She said clearly. “He’s been—distant and off since you guys stopped talking and he said he moved on but he hasn’t,” she added, crossing her arms over her chest. 

“He seemed like he’s moved on,” she whispered. 

“He would be a great dad to Archie—,” Josie said and Hope began to shake her head. “I’m not trying to say he’s going to replace Ethan because that’s not the case at all, trust me. All I’m saying is that he’s a great one to Jack and he’s an amazing one to Rosie,” she added. 

Hope looked stunned. “Rosie?” 

Josie nodded her head. “Rosie’s Landon’s daughter,” she said. “Penelope and I wanted to have a kid and we asked Landon to be the doner,” she said. 

“So you have two kids together,” she said. 

“Rosie is mine and Penelope’s,” Josie stepped forward. “While Landon is her dad biologically,” she paused. “It doesn’t make Penelope anything less than her mom,” she added softly. “So what I’m saying is—that little boy needs a father, Hope,” she whispered. “And Landon Kirby, he’s the best one I know,” she chuckled slightly. 

“He hates me,” she whispered. 

“He loves you, Hope Mikaelson,” she chuckled. “He’s just so fucking stubborn and won’t admit it,” she added. “Look, were having lunch today at our house — he’s going to be there and I think you and Archie should come, make amends,” 

“I don’t know about that,” she said. 

“We’re having some burgers, hot dogs and chips. There will be some alcohol — it will be a fun time.” She said. Hope looked down at Archie as he was still sound asleep. As much as she wants to go, she isn’t sure she can face Landon quite yet. He barely even knowledge her existence the other day — her coming into the lunch with a baby isn’t going to change that one bit. “Jack would love to have a brother—,” she smiled. “I think Penelope and I are done for now so it’s up to you and Landon,” she added. 

Hope chuckled sadly. “Yeah, your son made it clear that he wanted me to have a baby with his daddy,” she said. 

Josie nodded her head carefully. “Yeah well you’ve already done what is needed to be done for that before so what would hurt if you did it again?” She asked. 

“Rejection,” Hope said honestly. 

Josie chuckled. “Even if he wanted to, Hope. He could never drop you or reject you — it’s not him,” she added. 

* * *

Hope decided to take Josie up on the offer to go to her and Penelope’s house for brunch. Bringing Archie was going to be a wild ride but she knew she needed her friends around her because she needs the help. Raising a baby is hard but raising it by herself is harder. She is nervous about Landon’s reaction to him but she’s going to get through it. 

She parked her car in front of Josie and Penelope’s beach house and glared up at it. They made it didn’t they? She got out and headed to the backseat and grabbed Archie’s car seat where the six month hold was sleeping. 

He’s always sleeping. 

And she proceeded up the long ass driveway which is covered in cars already. Hope took a deep breath in and released as she heard laughter from the backyard, she decided to proceed that way and not even bother knocking on the door. No one would answer. 

She made it through the sand when a group of people come into her view — her eyes landed on Penelope and Josie first, Hope gave Josie a weak smile when they meet eyes. “There you are,” Josie said as she walked over to the shorter girl. They gave each other a soft hug before Josie bent down and looked at baby Archie. “He’s always sleeping,” she added. 

“Something his mom wishes she could do,” Hope joked as Penelope approached them. “If only he slept when I needed to sleep,” she added adjusting his car seat. 

“We have a little bassinet that we can bring out so you don’t have to carry him around,” Josie said. 

Hope shook her head. “He’s okay in the car seat, I can set him down next to me when I eat as long as I sit at the end of the table,” she said looking around. 

“Okay,” Josie smiled. There’s a moment of silence between the three girls. Hope continues to look around the area for a certain green eyed boy. “He’s not here yet,” Josie said. 

Hope let out a breath of air that she didn’t know she was holding. She really wasn’t ready to see him quite yet. She needs time to settle Archie in the new surroundings. “I am just not so ready to explain everything to him,” Hope said and Josie nodded her head, understanding completely. 

“Well we are about to eat so we can get you settled, anything to drink?” She asked. 

“Uh, you have any wine?” Hope asked as Penelope guided her to the end of the table. Hope gives a soft smile to everyone who is seated at the table. 

“White or red?” Josie asked. 

“Red please,” Hope set Archie down on the ground and bent down, adjusting his sweater and then putting a blanket over him and he stirred in his sleep. “Oh no, please, don’t,” Hope whispered. Archie started to cry. Hope took a deep breath in and released before shutting her eyes. 

“I’ll get you a plate,” Penelope touched her shoulder as Hope gave her a smile and Hope unbuckled Archie and took him out of the seat before sitting herself down on the chair. “Chicken or steak?” Penelope asked. 

“Chicken,” Hope said as she rocked Archie back and forth. “It’s okay, baby,” she leaned down and kissed his forehead. He’s hunger but breast feeding him in front of everyone isn’t the ideal situation. “Shhhh,” she whispered. 

“You can feed him,” Josie said as she placed the glass of wine in front of her. “They don’t mind,” she said, motioning to everyone else at the table, and they all agree. It’s a natural thing so people shouldn’t be weird about it. She nodded her head as she unzipped her jacket and got herself situated. Archie stopped crying the moment he began to eat.

“So how old is he?” Josie’s friend, Kym asked. 

“Uh, six months,” she whispered. 

“Another one of Kirby’s kids?” Kym asked. 

That made Hope chuckle, shaking her head. “No, Landon and I aren’t together, never were,” she said. Hope forgot that Kym went to high school with them. “I married Ethan.” She said and that’s when everyone’s face turned to shock. 

“Ethan Machado,” Kym said and Hope nodded her head. “So I’m guessing he’s his father?” Hope agreed again. “Damn, I always figured that Landon and you would have at least one kid together if he and Josie never made it,” she added. 

Why does everyone want them to have a kid together? “Uh, yeah well I haven’t talked to Landon in four years,” she said. 

“That’s most likely going to change today,” Kaleb said, he is Kym’s older brother and a friend of Penelope. Everyone at this table went to high school together. It’s just about how told they are and what year they graduated. Landon’s friend Rafael is here too, which definitely means Landon will be. 

“Very much aware,” Hope chuckled. 

“Why did you stop talking?” Penelope’s older brother Jed asked. “You two were inseparable in high school,” 

“Uh,” Hope chuckled. “He wasn’t the biggest fan of the fact that Ethan and I got married,” she whispered. 

“Because he finally realized he had feelings for her and he was too late,” Penelope said, chuckling. “His ego needed a boost anyways,” she sipped her wine. 

“Do you and your husband want anymore kids?” Kym asked. 

Hope’s throat went dry. Talking about Ethan’s death isn’t the best idea right now. It’s still fresh in her mind and she hates even thinking about it. Is it that hard? Yes. “Uh, my husband is no longer with us,” Hope whispered. Kym’s mouth dropped. “Iraq, two months ago,” she added. 

“Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry,” Kym apologized. 

Hope shrugged. “It’s okay. You didn’t know but to answer your question in a different way. I do want more kids but it’s all about who is willing to be okay with one that isn’t his,” she said motioning to her son in her arms. 

“Landon,” Josie said. 

“Landon and I aren’t—,” 

“No, Hope,” Josie points to the back entrance and Hope sees Landon standing there with his hands in his jeans pockets and small frown on his face. It’s like he had perfect timing. Archie was done eating, Hope tore her eyes away from Landon for a second so she could fix herself and she lifted Archie up to her shoulder. It’s like Josie knee because she reached into Archie’s diaper bag and pulled out a burp towel and handed it to her. “Hey,” Josie greeted him. 

“Hey,” Landon whispered. 

“Mommy,” Jack said excitedly as he appeared out of nowhere. Hope lightly pats Archie’s back as she avoids eye contact with Landon. “Daddy got me a slushie,” he said as he took a sip of it casually. 

“That’s great buddy,” Josie said hugging her son as she looked over at Hope. “Are you hungry?” She asked her son and Jack nodded his head. “Okay,” she kissed his forehead. “You going to come eat, Lan?” Josie asked Landon, who hasn’t moved from the spot he was in when Hope first saw him. He is too shocked by the baby in Hope’s arms. 

“Who’s—,” he stuttered out as he stared at the baby in Hope’s arm. “What is going—,” he questioned next. 

“Who’s that?” Jack asked as he pointed to him. She tore her eyes away from Landon and looked at the green eyed boy. 

Hope cleared her throat as she positioned Archie back into her arms, he’s wide away now. “This is Archie,” Hope smiled at Jack as he stepped closer and looked at him. “My son,” Hope said next and Jack smiled at him. 

“He’s got a funny nose,” Jack said as he put his hand on his stomach, tickling him slightly. Landon didn’t know what to think, he didn’t expect for Hope to have a kid. He doesn’t know where Ethan is but it makes him mad that he’s not around to help her right now. She looks exhausted and like she hasn’t slept in a while. “Is he like, my brother now?” Jack asked Hope, she smiled softly. 

Josie touched Jack’s head. “You can call him whatever you want, sweetheart,” Hope whispered. 

“I’ve always wanted a brother,” Jack smiled as he leaned down and gave Archie a kiss on the forehead before looking over at his father. “Daddy! I have a brother,” he smiled. 

Hope could’ve sworn she saw a smile on Landon’s face but it went away quickly. He gave his son a nod before heading into the house through back to go to the bathroom. Hope sighed deeply and sniffled. “Do you have somewhere I can change his diaper?” Hope asked Josie. 

“Yeah, inside on your left, there’s a bedroom.” She said. 

Hope nodded her head as she reached down and grabbed the diaper bag and headed into the house. She went into the small bedroom and saw a changing table. It must be Josie and Penelope’s master bedroom. She dropped the bag on the ground and then placed baby Archie on the table.

She took a moment to gather her thoughts as Archie looked around at his surroundings. She misses him. She really does and she didn’t realize how much until seeing him again. She really does want things to be right. Hope shook the thoughts away and took out everything she needed and began to change his diaper. Thankfully he only went pee. “You are such a good boy, buddy,” Hope said as she wiped him. “You are going to be a great boy,” she added. 

She was startled by the sound of the toilet flushing and then the door to the bathroom opens us and Landon walked out, zipping up his zipper and fixing his shirt — he stopped when he noticed Hope there. Hope swallowed and looked back down at her son. “Sorry, I didn’t realize anyone was in here,” she said as she buttoned Archie up. 

Landon shook his head. “It’s fine, it’s the only bathroom downstairs and I didn’t feel like going up stairs just to be,” he whispered. He watched as Hope lifted up Archie into her arms and then grabbed the back and struggled for a second. He needs to help her, he always does. He shut his eyes and sighed for a second before rushing over to her. “I got it,” 

“You don’t—,” 

“It’s fine,” he grabbed the bag and swung it over his shoulder, looking her in the eyes for the first time in four years. The tension between the two is unbelievable. She didn’t know how much longer she could look at him without crying. “I want to apologize for yesterday,” Landon whispered. 

“It’s okay,” she said. 

Landon shook his head, “No it’s not,” he said softly. “I was a dick to you and I know it’s not an excuse but I wasn’t expecting to see you,” he added next, his eyes watering. Hope nodded her head in understanding. “And the truth is—,” he paused for a second, shaking his head. “It made me realize how much I’ve missed you,” he whispered. 

Hope bit the inside of her cheek — not responding. Landon took a deep breath in and released before looking down at Archie — he smiled softly. “You have a baby,” he whispered. 

Hope nodded her head. “I have a baby,” 

Landon licked his lips. “I have a daughter now, if you didn’t know,” he said and Hope chuckled and nodded her head. Did he get taller or did she get shorter? She thought to herself as he looked down at him. “What’s his name?” He asked. 

“Archer,” Hope whispered. “Archie for short,” she added. 

“Can I hold him?” Landon whispered hesitantly. It’s like a rock was lifted off her chest. She doesn’t know why she was nervous about Landon meeting Archie. She knew she shouldn’t have been. Hope smiled softly and whispered a small, “of course,” before Landon smiled softly and carefully reached out for him. “He’s smaller than Jack was,” he said. 

Hope watched as Landon held Archie out in front of him with one hand on the back of his head and the other on his lower back, smiling down at him. “Hi buddy,” Landon said in a high pitched voice as Archie looked at him with tired eyes. Hope felt herself tearing up at this sight. Archie is never going to have moments like this with his dad. Archie lets put a huge yawn. “Awe big yawn,” Landon chuckled. 

Hope crosses her arms over her chest and looked at the two boys. Landon leaned down and brushed his nose against Archie’s which causes him to let out a small giggle. Hope hasn’t heard him giggle since Ethan died. That made her even more emotional. “He’s got your eyes,” Landon whispered as he glanced up at Hope. 

“Yeah,” she whispered. 

Landon noticed how red Hope’s eyes were getting. He doesn’t know if he said something wrong or what but this girl crying is the last thing he wants. “Hope?” He questioned. 

“I’m sorry,” Hope whispered 

Landon shook his head and adjusted Archie in his arms so he was holding him with one arm. “What’s wrong?” He asked, putting his free hand on the back of her neck. Hope still gets chills when he touches her. 

Hope bit the inside of her cheek again and looked down at her son. “This is the first time I’ve heard him laugh since—,” she stopped herself talking to let out an uncontrollable sob and that’s when Landon didn’t wait another second to bring her unto his chest — his chin rested on the side of her head and his free arm went around her shoulders. “He’s gone,” Hope cried and Landon didn’t understand. 

Landon felt her arms tighten around his waist. “Who?” 

“Ethan,” she whispered. Landon didn’t know how to respond. Ethan’s dead? Or is he just gone? He doesn’t know but from the looks of her tears and the wetness on his T-shirt, he’s gone. He wouldn’t leave his family. He wouldn’t leave his son. He would be fucking stupid to leave Hope. “I don’t know how to do this, Landon,” she cried. 

Landon felt his heartbreak even more. He glanced down at the baby boy in his arm and he knew he needed to step up. If something happened to Josie — Hope would’ve stepped up and been a mother to Jack. Archie wiggled his arms in the air and smiled at Landon. “You’re not alone,” Landon said. 

Hope sniffed and rested her chin on his chest as she looked up at him and he looked down at him. “He’s not alone,” he added with a soft smile. “Okay?” He whispered and Hope broke down and nodded her head as Landon kissed her forehead and hugged her tighter. 

He needed this. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long. I had writers block but I’m good know. you know what to do


	10. (even if you don’t believe me) i’m yours

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short but leads up to a huge chapter next.

It’s been a couple of weeks since Hope and Landon reunited and everything has been running smoothly. Landon loves little Archie. He can’t get enough of him, really. He doesn’t get to see Rosie as much as he would like but he understands that because she’s Penelope and Josie’s. But he misses being a dad to a little infant and he’s been acting like one towards Archie, which has been awesome. He wouldn’t want this moment to go any other way. 

And since Hope works a lot with her being the head of the department now — Archie is always with Landon at this recording studio. He doesn’t have many artists at the moment but he is working on it. He’s thought about recording his own album but he loves the business side of things too. 

Landon rocked Archie back and forth in his arms as he fed thin the bottle of Hope’s breast milk. He usually falls asleep afterwards but this time he is wide away and ready to party. “You are not going to sleep today are you?” He asked the six month old. 

Archie laughed and wiggled his hands in the air as Landon brought him up to his shoulder and started to burp him like he usually does. He knows that Hope thinks he looks like Ethan but he sees Hope all the way which is wonderful to him. He knows how much Hope has wanted to become a mother. He just was secretly hoping it could be with him. 

His phone went off while he was burping Archie so he walked over to his desk and picked it up. “Thank you for calling Ocean Records, Landon Kirby speaking how may I help you?” He asked professionally. 

“Professional,” a familiar voice called. “Sexy,” she added which causes Landon to roll his eyes. “I’m calling to see how my son is doing,” she added. 

Landon chuckled as he sat himself down at the desk. “He is fine, Hope. I know what I’m doing,” he said. 

“I never said you didn’t know what you’re doing, Landon. I know you do but I’m protective over my baby boy so you better get used to these phone calls and text messages,” she said sternly. 

He rolled his eyes. “Noted,” he added. 

“He’s doing okay?” Hope whispered. 

“He’s fine,” Landon agreed. “I just gave him a bottle and now he’s finally falling asleep on my shoulder so I can get some work done,” he said. 

“Okay,” she said softly. “Uh, I’ll be off in like thirty minutes or so and then I’ll come and get him. Maybe you’ll have time to get some breakfast?” She asked. 

Landon loves how close they are getting again. Hope is staying at his house all the time and hanging out with Jack and stuff and it’s like nothing ever changed between them but he knows that his feelings for her are still there. He doesn’t want to make a move because she’s still heartbroken over what happened with Ethan and he’s not the type of guy that will make a move when someone is grieving. It’s just not who he is. 

“Sounds good, gorgeous,” he said. 

“Okay,” Hope chuckled. “I’ll text you when I’m on the way and give Archie a kiss for me.” She said. Landon leaned to Archie’s head and kissed him loudly so Hope could hear on the other side of the phone. He could literally hear her smiling, which is weird to say. “Thank you,” and then the phone went dead and he sighed deeply. 

Landon put the phone down and looked at Archie who is now asleep on his shoulder. He chuckled as he kissed the side of his head. “Gosh, who did you get pregnant this time?” Landon turned towards the door and there stood his father — whom he hasn’t seen in two years. 

“Dad,” Landon said in shock. 

“Now, how many grandchildren do I have exactly?” Harrison asked as he shut the door and walked over to his son. “Because I thought one was enough,” he added. 

Landon and his dad never got along but recently he’s tried to reach out more often but he’s never followed through. Only when it has to do with Jack. “What are you doing here?” Landon asked as he adjusted Archie in his arms. 

“Your birthday is coming up,” Harrison shrugged. 

“Dad, I’m turning 30 and this is the first birthday you’ve attended since I was sixteen,” Landon said. 

“Better late than never right?” He chuckled as he sat himself on the couch across the room, crossing his legs. “So you going to introduce me to your baby,” he asked. 

“He’s not—,” Landon stopped himself, rolling his eyes. “His name is Archie and he’s not mine biologically,” he added. “He’s Hope’s,” added. 

“Ahh,” he nodded his head. “The girl you said you never fucked in high school — the one that was supposedly your best friend but I always thought was more.” Landon groaned in frustration as he walked over to the bassinet in the corner and placed Archie down carefully, not waking him up. “You went through boxes of condoms like I did beer,” he added. 

“Hope and I aren’t together like that, dad,” Landon said as he walked over to his dad and knocked his feet off the coffee table before grabbing the empty baby bottle. “Hope’s late husband was killed in Iraq when Archie was four months old and I’m not going to let the little guy grow up without a father, it’s not the type of person I am,” he added. 

Harrison rested his feet up against, sighing deeply. “Good, I didn’t need to come back and find out I’m a grandpa again,” he said and that’s when Landon pauses. Harrison notices. “Wait, what?” He groaned. 

“I helped Josie and Penelope out,” Landon shrugged. 

“You got your ex girlfriend pregnant again? How did that go over with her girlfriend?” Harrison asked. 

He groaned in frustration. “Oh my god dad, no! I donated my sperm. I didn’t have sex with her,” he added. “I went into the bathroom, jacked off and then the doctors did the rest,” he explained as he cleaned up his off. 

Harrison nodded his head. “So let me guess, you were thinking of Hope while you were jacking off?” He asked. 

“Dad, I’m not talking to you about this — just know you have a grandson named Jack and a granddaughter named Rosie, now you can leave for another few years and not come back,” Landon said as he looked over Archie who is still fast asleep and probably won’t be waking up sooner 

Harrison lets out a sigh. “I was thinking about sticking around for a bit — buy Jack some toys, what is he into today? Trucks? Cars?” He asked. 

“Baseball and puzzles,” Landon said. “It’s been the same for the last four years, and you don’t need to stay on the count of my son,” he added as he leaned his butt against his desk. 

Harrison shrugged. “I’m not going anywhere,” 

“This is my way of saying in the nicest way possible for you to get the hell out and go,” he said smiling. 

“I’m staying with your brother,” Harrison stood up and walked over to his son, putting his hand on the back of his neck and looking into his eyes sternly. “I love you kid, I’ll be keeping in touch,” he said before smiling and then walking away but before he left, he turned. “You and Hope would be awesome together, she brings something out in you — just try and use a condom, no more kids,” he added before leaving Landon with rolling his eyes. 

Landon’s cell phone went off and he reached into his pocket and pulled it out. It’s a text message from Josie. 

**_Josie Park: Can you pick up Jack from school? Penelope can’t get out of work and Rosie is with me. He wanted to stay with you anyways._ **

Landon sighed deeply. He looked at the clock and it’s 9:34 which means there’s about three hours until he has to get Jack from school. He has time to get breakfast with Hope. He really wants to spend more time with her. 

**_Landon Kirby: Yeah, I’ll come by and get some of his stuff later. I’m getting breakfast with Hope. I watched Archie last night while she was working so he’s with me. I know how much Jack adores the kid._ **

**_Josie Park: You guys together yet?_ **

**_Landon Kirby: No and we aren’t going to be._ **

**_Josie Park: You’re already acting as a father to Archie. Just make a move, Landon. We’re all getting impatient._ **

Landon sighed deeply before shaking his head in disbelief. He heard a noise coming from Archie bassinet and when he looked over, he saw Archie grabbing onto something. He quickly rushed over and grabbed it from him, how did a pen get into the bassinet? He put the pen behind his ear and lifted Archie up into his arms, staring at him. “You look so much like your mother, buddy it’s crazy,” he said. 

Archie opened and closed his eyes a few times. The door opened and he expected it to be Hope but it wasn’t. It was Declan. “Hey,” he said softly. 

“Hey,” Landon smiled. “What are you doing here? You just missed dad, he said he’s staying with you—,” 

“He is staying with me,” Declan said. 

“Okay good,” Landon chuckled. 

“We’ve got a problem, Lan,” he added. 

Landon’s face falls. 

* * *

“I didn’t know what to do, man. He was, there covered in blood and it’s like that night all over again,” Declan said as he paced around the office. “He always comes to me when he’s in trouble because I always cave,” he added. 

“Did he say what happened?” Landon asked. 

“No, he just said that he needed help with something and then the next thing I know, he’s bringing in a dead girl. What the hell was I supposed to do?” He asked. 

“Where’s the girl?” Landon asked. 

“He asked me to get rid of it but I couldn’t man, SHE'S in my trunk and I’m going to the police,” he said. 

“In your trunk—okay uh, I don’t know what you want me to do, bro, I have a kid to look after,” Landon said motioning to Archie who is laying in his arms right now. 

“I just wanted to let you know to try and stay away from him okay? I have to try and convince the cops that this wasn’t me,” he said next. 

“How the hell are going to do that?” 

Declan shrugged. “I don’t know. Dad’s fingerprints should be all over the body shouldn’t they? I don’t know, man look just stay away from okay? You’ve got a family, you’ve got Hope and Archie and Jack to worry about,” he added. 

“Dec—,” 

“I love you little brother,” Declan kisses his head before kissing Archie’s head and then grabbing the doorknob, putting his hood over his head and leaving. 

It wasn’t that much longer when the door opened and in came, Hope wearing her work stuff still. She must’ve gotten off a little bit sooner than expected. All Landon has been able to think about is what his brother said. Why did his dad kill someone? What did he get into? “Hey baby,” Hope said. 

Landon thought he’d play around. “Hey gorgeous,” Hope scoffed and hit his chest as she grabbed Archie from his arms. Archie was so happy to see his mom, his hands started waving around and his legs were kicking. “He took like a ten minute nap a few minutes ago but he’s been wide awake since this morning,” Landon said, leaning against his desk — looking exhausted. 

“You look like you haven’t slept,” she chuckled. “Did he keep you up last night?” she asked next. 

Landon shook his head. “He was fine,” he said as he crossed his arms over his chest. “I think I’ve just gotten used to you sleeping next to me again,” he added. Hope smiled slightly. Yeah, they’ve been sharing a room but that’s only because — well, honestly, it’s because he wants to. And he wants to be close to Archie too so Hope doesn’t have to deal with everything herself. “Uh, anyways. I have to get Jack from school and then go see my brother so maybe we can postpone the little breakfast run?” Landon asked. 

Hope pouted. “I was really looking forward to it,” she said. 

Landon chuckled as he stood up and grabbed his jacket, putting it over his shoulders before grabbing his shoulder bag and looking over at the beautiful girl in front of him. “I know but this is important,” he said as he took a few steps closer to her. “And I was also hoping that maybe,” he paused and stopped right in front of her. “We can talk—about us,” he added. 

Hope smirked. “Us?” She whispered. 

Landon nodded. “Yeah well you know, you seem to be already living in my apartment so why don’t you and Archie move in?” He suggested. “That way you can give MG and Lizzie some space to create their own family. I’m not sure you’d want to be around when that happens,” he added. 

Hope chuckled. “I guess not,” she said. 

Landon pushed a piece of her hair behind her ear. “And I want to talk to you about potentially moving forward,” he paused and looked into her eyes. “With us,” he added. Hope felt her heart pounding against her chest. Is she ready to move on from Ethan’s death? “So I can kiss you whenever I want to,” he whispered softly. 

“You can do that without putting a label on it,” she said 

“Maybe I want the ability to call you my girlfriend?” He said and that’s when Hope’s heart skipped a beat. Did he really just say that? “But if you’re not ready,” he added. “Then we don’t have to rush anything,” he added. 

Hope nodded her head. “Okay,” 

Landon smiled lightly and then leaned down and kissed Archie’s forehead. “I’ll see you later, buddy,” he said before he turned his head to Hope. “And I’ll definitely be seeing you later,” he whispered to Hope before kissing her cheek. He could feel Hope’s blush against his lips. 

Landon gave her one last smile before grabbing the door and leaving the studio. He knew that Hope would lock it up. He needs to go figure this stuff out with his brother. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you know what to do. what do you think will happen to declan?


	11. why me? (because i love you)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Landon talks to Declan and Hope asks Landon why he loves her.

Landon headed straight to the police station after dropping Jack off with Hope — he didn’t really explain anything to her just that he would be home by dinner. 

He hasn’t heard anything from his brother and that’s scared him. He probably got arrested and is rotting in some cell because of shit that his dad did. He can’t let his brother go down for a crime that he didn’t commit. 

When he pushed the doors open — the moment became a reality. It was awful to think his brother is locked up somewhere and not being able to go anywhere. Landon walked over to the desk and was greeted with an officer. “How can I help you?” She asked. 

“Uh, I’m looking for Declan Kirby?” He said.

She typed away at the computer and her face fell. “He was just booked a few moments ago, can I ask your relationship?” She asked. 

“I’m his little brother,” he said. 

The kind lady brought Landon into the back and all Landon could smell was fear — fear from everyone. She brought her into the back room where the cells were and Landon’s eyes automatically fell on his brother, sitting on the concrete floor, arms on his knees and his head towards the ground. “Dec,” Landon called out. 

Declan looked up and his eyes widened. “Landon, what are you doing here?” he stood up quickly and grabbed the bars as his little brother walked over to him. “I told you to let me handle this okay? Go back to your girl,” 

“You’re my brother, Dec. You can’t just expect me to sit and watch as you rot in this cell for something that dad did, how the hell is that fair?” 

He sighed. “This is just a security measure but either way little brother, I am going to jail, I helped cleaned up the mess,” he said. “Landon, go home with Hope and Jack and Archie - go watch your boys and your daughter grow up, let me handle dad, okay?” he said. 

“I’m not going to just sit here and watch your life be taken from you, Dec,” Landon whispered. 

“I’ll be fine, this will all be better I promise just go home,” he said. 

“I can’t leave you,” he whispered. 

“Landon, go,” he said softer this time. 

Landon didn’t. He just stood there and stared at his brother with desperate eyes. “Hope is finally single, little brother. Go and make a family. Go and have a kid with her. Finally get the happiness that you want.” he said. 

“Dec--,” 

“Landon, please, do this for me.” a single tear fell from Declan’s eye. “Dad is not your problem anymore, he never was. You were always going to be the successful son, I was always going to be the fall back,” he added. 

“I will not live my life knowing you’re in here,” Landon huffed. 

Declan sighed deeply. “You need to, bro,” he said. Landon shook his head. “You’re a dad, Lan. You’ve got two beautiful kids. Jack, with his cheeky smile and quirky attitude,” he giggled. “And Rosie, now she’s only two months old but she’s going to grow up to be as annoying and cheeky as her uncle Dec,” he added. 

“Declan,” Landon whispered. 

  
“Go, Lan,” he whispered. 

Landon shook his head, grabbing his brother’s hand that was gripping the bar. “I’m going to ask Hope to be my girlfriend tonight,” Landon whispered and Declan smiled. “And I will be the best father to not only my two children but Archie as well,” he added. 

“I don’t expect anything less,” Declan whispered. 

“They are going to grow up knowing who their uncle Dec is,” Landon said. 

Declan let out a shaky sigh. “Listen to me carefully, and remember this okay?” Declan leaned. “In my apartment, there’s an extra key under the mat near the door, you can use that to get in, there’s a safe in my closet, underneath a thermal blanket, the code is your birthday and inside that safe, there’s a folder with a flashdrive,” he whispered. 

“What--,” 

“I need you to into safe and get it out and listen to it and watch it.” Declan said. “If there is any chance of me getting out of here, Lan it’s on that tape and I need you to figure it out for me,” 

“What am I looking for?” 

Declan shook his head, shrugging his shoulders. “It’s that security tape from that night? The one from when we were in high school,” he said. 

“How did you get that?” Landon whispered. 

Declan shook his head. “That doesn’t matter but what matters is that dad needs to pay for what he did and what he has done and the only way for that to happen is if we see what’s on that tape that the cops didn’t before, you’re smart, Landon go look and see what you can find,” he said. 

“I don’t know what I’m looking for,” Landon cried. 

“I’m trusting you with this, Lan because I know you can find it,” he said. 

“Sir you need to go,” the officer said, grabbing Landon’s shoulder. 

“Declan,” Landon cried. 

“I’m fine, go,” he said. 

“Sir,” 

Landon pushed her off him and then brushed passed her, angrly. He couldn’t believe that this is happening. Did he really just walk away from his brother in a jail cell? What kind of person does that? Not a true brother. 

Landon slammed out of the back and into the lobby and his eyes landed straight onto the man responsible for this. His dad walks into the station in a panic. “Hi, I’m looking for Detective Bohen,” he said to an officer. 

“What the hell did you do?” Landon screamed at his dad, rushing over to him. 

Harrison looked at him. “Landon?” 

Landon grabbed his collar and pushed him up against the nearest wall. All the available officers rushed over. “He’s in a fucking cell because of you! How much more of this can you do until you realize that you are ruining our lives? Do you really hate us that much? Huh?” he screamed into his face. 

Harrison tried to get away from him. “Son,” 

“Don’t call me that!” Landon screamed, he reached back and went to slam him in the mouth but he was stopped by a police officer and was pulled off of his dad. “He didn’t do this! It was you! It’s your fault that my big brother is behind bars, you coward!” he screamed but it was a cry. 

Harrison stared at his distressed son in shock. “I’m going to fix this,” he said. 

Landon shook his head. “No! You’re going to fix this for you, not him because god forbid you can do anything for anyone but yourself,” he cried. 

“Do you want to press charges?” The officer asked. 

“No,” Harrison said quickly. 

“I want you to stay away from me,” Landon said, the officer still holding him back. “I want you to stay away from Hope, I want you to stay away from Jack, Rosie and I definitely want you to stay away from Declan because he’s in the mess because your anger issues are too much for you to handle,” he added. 

“Son,” 

“Stay the fuck away from me,” Landon brushed passed the cop before rushing out of the station. He wasn’t going to give up on his big brother, he can’t give up on his big brother. Declan would never do that. 

Landon got into his truck and headed towards Declan’s apartment. He needed to watched that tape.

After a fifteen minute drive, he headed up the staircase and down the long hallway to the apartment. He lifted the mat up and grabbed the spare key before opening the door. The apartment was decorated with football stuff and it was pretty clean but it smelled of weed, he didn’t expect anything less. 

He shut the door and put the spare key on the kitchen table before walking straight into bedroom, which smelt like sex. He groaned in disgust as he’s pretty sure his brother fucked some girl in this room last night because there was a used condom on the ground. He stepped over it and walked to the closet and went straight to the safe. 

He typed in his birthday and it clicked before he opened it up and grabbed the only thing that was in there, the pocketed folder that Delcan said would be in there. He stood up and opened it up and there was indeed a flashdrive in there so he emptied it out into his hand and looked at it.    
  
This could get his brother back. 

Landon thought about getting brother’s laptop and watching it now but his phone went off and when he looked at the screen, he cursed: 9:39PM. Has he been out that long? 

**_Hope Mikaelson: Are you coming home? I made pasta and the boys are asleep already._ **

Landon sighed deeply and slipped the flash drive into his jean pocket and then rushed out of the apartment as he responded to Hope. 

**_Landon Kirby: On my way, beautiful. Sorry. Got caught up with Declan._ **

**_Hope Mikaelson: Is everything okay?_ **

**_Landon Kirby: As soon as I see you, it will be._ **

He grabbed the key from the table and locked the door on his way out before heading out of the complex. He’s going to go home, kiss his sons good night and then finally make his best friend his girlfriend. He’s the only thing that will get him distracted from what is going on with his brother. 

He arrived at the apartment thirty minutes later and he opened the door with ease before placing the keys on the hook near the door and turning the entrance light on. It lit the room up and his eyes landed on the empty living room. The smell of cooking filled his nostrils -- Hope did make pasta, that makes him smile. 

He took his shoes off and then his jacket before walking into the apartment deeper. He saw that his light was on so he walked over to his bedroom and smiled when he saw Hope standing in front of a mirror, running her fingers through her damp hair. She surely is beautiful. Really beautiful. 

There were a few moments where he just stared at her as he leaned up against the frame of the door. He admired her figure and her smile. He really is lucky if this girl even considers going out with him but he has to try, right? 

High school was a mistake for him, he knows that he should’ve been with Hope this entire time but it doesn’t mean he regrets being with Josie because he got two wonderful kids from it — well technically one because Rosie wasn’t conceived naturally but you get the point. 

Landon wants another baby, and he wants it with Hope. He knows that now and he wants to make sure she does too. 

He smirked. “I’m a little confused on why you’re not wearing my clothes if you’re staying in my bed,” he said. 

Hope looked up through the mirror and smiled as Landon walked into the room. “Hi,” she giggled before turning around, still running her hands through her hair. “I had to shower because my son decided to throw up on my hair instead of the burp towel on my shoulder but after maybe three showers, I feel clean,” she said. 

“Three?” Landon questioned. 

“Three,” Hope giggled as she nodded her head. Landon stopped a few feet in front of her and couldn’t help but smile. “Is everything okay? You look distracted,” she said. 

Landon nodded his head, shrugging his shoulders as he stepped forward and grabbed his arms around her shoulders and hers went around his waist, he looked down at her and her blue eyes made him fall in love even more. He loves those a blue ocean eyes. “My dad got Declan into some trouble but I’m handling it,” he said. 

“What kind of trouble?” Hope asked. 

Landon shook his head. “Nothing you need to worry about,” he said, smiling down at her. 

“Are you in danger?” She asked. 

Landon laughed. “No,” he rolled his eyes. “But if I were, it would be because my girlfriend would beat my ass,” 

“Still set on the girlfriend part huh?” She asked. 

“Yeah,” Landon said. “Because if you think about it this way, we already have a wonderful family,” he whispered. Hope smiled. “You, me and our two boys,” he added. 

“Jack isn’t mine,” Hope said. 

“And Archie isn't mine,” he said. “But that boy is still my boy and Jack is still yours,” he added. “DNA doesn’t make family, love does, baby,” he continued. 

Hope licked her lips and sighed. “Can I ask you something?” 

“Always,” 

“Why me?” She asked. 

Landon tilted his head. “What do you mean?” 

“Do you love me?” Hope whispered. 

Landon chuckled. “Of course I do,” 

Hope smiled. “Okay then tell me why? What’s so special about me? Why did you fall in love with me?” She asked. 

Landon wasn’t expecting this question but she asked it so he has to be completely honest. It’s the only way this is going to work for them. He needs to tell her how much she means to her and why. How though? 

He took a deep breath and released it before starting to speak. “I love that you know me, Hope,” he said looking at her softly. “I love your facial expressions. I love the way you say my name,” he added laughing. 

Hope giggled back, blushing slightly. “I love the way that you  _ want  _ to tell me things and I love your smile,” he added. 

“I love your laugh. I love that we have the same sense of humor and I love that we’re on the same wavelength,” he continued — he’s just saying the first thing that comes to his mind and it seems to be working because she’s tearing up already. “I love the friendly kind of flirting,” he added. 

Hope’s hands fall to his face. “I love our conversations,” he whispered, sweetly. “I love that you care even when it’s not the kind of care that I want and I love that you’re never awkward around me,” he laughed which made Hope laugh softly as well. “I love that whenever you hug me, your smell lingers on my clothing and I love your hugs and how they’re warm and safe,” he added. 

“I love the way your eyes light up when you laugh and how you’re such a geek sometimes,” he giggled, which made Hope hit him in the chest as tears fall from her eyes. “I love how perfect our hands fit together and I love that you’re concerned for me all the time,” he added. 

Hope couldn’t help but cry. She wasn’t expecting this answer from the small question she asked. “I love how you trust me and I love how we’re best friends,” he added. He’s getting more serious now. “I love that I can trust you with anything and I love that you’re always so close by.” He laughed. “I love that I was able to know you as a friend and grow to know you as more,” he added. 

Hope didn’t say anything, she just continued to listen. “I love how perfect of a mom you are and I don’t need to see you in action or see you become one bebcause before you became a mom you already treated my son with as much love and respect he deserved, despite him not being yours,” he added, tears falling. 

Hope scanned his eyes. “And it’s crazy because I know when know the exact moment I fell in love with you, Hope, he said truthfully. “But it’s like watching a snowstorm, you see the flakes falling but you don’t even realize how their adding up and then suddenly your whole lawn is covered and all these little things have added up and you’re the snowstorm, baby,” he said confidently. 

Hope let out a soft cry. “I will choose you, even when you make me made. My love for you will not fade away because we’re angry at each other.” He whispered. “I know we will fight, we will be frustrated, we will be human. Still, I will choose you. I will keep choosing you. Everyday, every hour and every minute, you’re it,” he added. 

“You’re my best friend, Hope Mikaelson,” Landon smiled. “My human diary,” he added. “And my other half. You mean the world to me, baby,” he continued. “I fell in love with you. I don’t know how. I don’t know why, I just did,” he added. 

Hope let the tears escape. “So to answer your question, why you?” He whispered. “My answer is because I love you,” 

Hope was speechless, utterly speechless. She always knew Landon was great with his words but she wasn’t expecting that. She didn’t know how to respond so she responded with the one way that didn’t involve words but it did involve her mouth. She kissed him. With everything she had. Her hands tangled in his hair and the taste of her own tears on her lips. This man is the love of her life — she knows that. 

She’s knows that now more than ever. 

And she wasn’t going to wait another second of making sure he knows that either. 

“Oh my gosh,” she cried as she pulled apart. Landon laughed and licked his lips. “You sure are something else, Landon Kirby, you know that right?” She asked. 

“I’m guessing that these tears are happy tears,” he said. 

“Gosh, of course they are,” she whispered. “God I love you so much,” she added with a chuckle. 

“Yeah?” 

“Yeah,” Hope nodded her head. “I can’t wait to start a live with you, start a family and have a little Kirby/Mikaelson running around here,” she added with a laugh. 

“Woah, you just became my girlfriend let’s consider waiting to have a baby until we get married,” he added. 

“Let’s try the sex part though—,” she said. “All the fucking time so this time you remember it,” she added. 

“With protection though?” He asked. 

“I don’t care as long as you’re in me,” she said. 

Landon chuckled and Hope captured that laugh with her mouth as they backed up towards the bed. She took Landon’s shirt off quickly before they fell onto the bed, bodies colliding strongly and Landon’s loan escaping his mouth. “I love you so much,” Landon whispered. 

Hope smiled. “I love you too,” 

That’s a happy ending, right? 

Right. 

Well…..

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my favorite chapter so far. i love writing soft Landon. you know what to do.


	12. Elijah Mikaelson

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Landon finds out some news about Hope’s family

The way his hands fit perfectly in hers and the way their lips are made for each other’s is unbelievable. After kissing for a while, he pulled away and looked at her with desperation. Hope’s hands fall to his face and she doesn’t speak. It’s been forever since they’ve been this way with each other and while Hope remembers the way he feels, he doesn’t remember the way she does so he’s a little nervous. 

“We don’t have to do this,” Hope whispered. 

Landon and Hope’s noses touch as her hands grip his curly hair. Does he turn down the perfect oppurtunity to have sex with the love of his life just so the moment can be perfectly planned out or does he do it and possibly regret it in the morning? He doesn’t know but all he does know is that he loves this girl below him. “We’ve done it before,” he said. 

“I know,” Hope whispered. 

“And I don’t remember a lot of it,” he whispered. 

“And you’re nervous,” she added. 

“You think I’m a freak,” he said. 

Hope shook her head as she reached up and gave him a kiss before pulling on his hair more. “No, baby. No.” she said as she looked into his green eyes. “I think it’s sweet,” she added. 

“Like do we use a condom or not or do we do it under the covers,” he rambled. 

“I suggest condoms and the covers will get in the way,” Hope responded. 

“And do we like-you on top or me on top,” he rambled again. 

Hope chuckled. “Either way,” she added. 

“See you’re laughing, you think I’m a freak show,” he grumbled as he tilted his head away from her but her hands forced him to look down at her. 

Hope kissed his lips again for about three seconds before pulling away. “I do not think you’re a freak show, Landon. I think you’re a guy in love who is nervous about having sex with the girl the first time,” she said. 

“That’s the thing, Hope. It’s not our first time, we’ve done it before and I can’t remember it—,” 

“I’m not a screamer if that’s what you’re worried about,” 

He shook his head. “I’m worried about messing it up,”

Hope shook her head. “You won’t mess it up baby,” she said. “You know what you’re doing, I know that for a fact,” she added as she put her hands to his chest. “I will take your shirt off, you’ll take mine off and then we can kiss a little—,” she suggested as she began to unbutton her shirt. 

“What if we just got straight into it,” he suggested. “Pop it out and stick it in — see where it takes us,” he added. 

“Not very romantic,” she said. 

“When is sex romantic?” He asked. 

Hope got an idea. She patted his chest and he hopped off of her before she stood up and looked down at him. “Give me your hand, Landon Kirby,” she said holding hers out. Landon grabbed it and stood up — he already had a erection. “You’re worried and scared because you’re thinking about the first time we had sex and how you don’t remember a lot of it right? Well I do so let’s just do it as if it was the first time,” she said, dragging him into the bathroom. 

Landon watched as she turned the light on and then turned the shower on, adjusting the temperature. “So — you came in and I was naked,” she said, grabbing the edge of her shirt and pulling it over her head — she doesn’t have a bra on. He smiled as he scanned her chest before he watched her drop her pants as well, leaving her completely naked. “And I got embarrassed and covered myself with the curtain. 

Landon took a step closer. “Why would you do that?” 

“You had your shirt off,” she said, smirking. Landon chuckled. “And then we get into the shower, we kiss for a little and then you went down on me,” she said. Landon moaned at the thought. “And then we got out, I sat on the sinks and you well—,” she shrugged. 

“I’m suddenly not nervous anymore,” he said and Hope let out a squeal as Landon grabbed her and brought her into the shower. This is going to be an easy night. 

* * *

  
Hope pushed a piece of Landon’s hair out of his face as they lay in bed. Landon put his hand on her bare waist and smiled at her. The first time ever in a while, Landon’s felt the best he's felt in a long time and it’s the arms of the love of his life. “You’re awfully quiet,” Hope whispered, putting her hand on his chest above his heart. Landon smiled and shrugged his shoulder as he leaned in and gave her a kiss. “What’s that?” She asked as she pulled back slightly. 

He chuckled. “What?” 

“That thing on your face?” Hope chuckled. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he said. Hope squinted her eyes at him and tried to read his thoughts but it wasn’t exactly working that well. “I’m just—,” he paused and rubbed his thumb across her hip. “I’m happy,” he added. 

Hope rolled her eyes. “Well I know that, you’re with me,” she said cocky which makes Landon huff a laugh in disbelief. “But I’m happy too, very, very happy,” she said, rubbing her hand across his chest. “While this isn’t exactly how I envisioned having a family — I couldn’t have asked for anything better — we have our boys and each other,” she smiled, scooting closer. 

He smiled. “You envisioned us having a family?” 

Hope laughed and nodded her head as she blushed slightly. “Two little boys — married by 27 for me at least and—,” she licked her lips. “Possibly just possibly moving to New Orleans,” she added carefully. 

“New Orleans?” Landon questioned. 

“Apparently I have an uncle there, who was like dad’s saving grace before he realized that my dad was a loss cause,” Hope said, smirking. “I’ve always wanted to know if I had more family other than Freya and Keelin and I guess I have my answer — thanks for a lot of research and money,” 

“So older or younger?” 

“Older,” Hope said. “He’s my dad’s big brother but he’s younger than Freya so I’m guessing early forties, mid-forties and I’m sure if we hook up him and Maya, he’ll consider it—,” she joked which caused Landon to playfully kiss all over her face which makes her squeal. 

Landon pecks her lips before pulling away. “So what you’re saying to me right now is that you want to take Jack and Archie to go meet your Uncle—,” 

“Elijah,” 

“Uncle Elijah in New Orleans so it can feel like we're an actual family?” Landon asked questionably. Hope nodded her head, licking her lips. They are dry from all the kissing that her and Landon have done tonight. “When would you want to go?” He asked next. 

Hope shrugged. “Next week?” 

“I’ll have to ask Josie if Jack can go,” he said. Hope smiled widely. “But—,” he held his finger up. “I want you to promise me something,” he said and Hope nodded her head. “When we come back, you will pack up your stuff from Liz’s house, finally and we’ll go shopping for a bigger place because I’ve waited four years for a life with you, and I don’t want to wait any longer,” he said holding out his pinky.

Hope smiled widely before nodding her head and linking their pinkies together. “Now that’s settled, we should talk about the elephant in the room,” she said. 

“I didn’t realize there was one,” he mumbled. 

“We just had sex,” Hope mentioned. 

“I was there,” Landon chuckled. 

“I’m being serious, Landon,” she said. 

“Okay, okay,” he cleared his throat. “My favorite part would probably be when you did that little thing with your hips and—,” Hope grabbed him by the neck and kissed him, shutting him up — he moaned as he kissed her back. The kiss was so fucking amazing that when Hope pulled away, he chased after her lips. “Why—why—?” 

“Are we officially together?” Hope asked. 

“Uh,” Landon chuckled. “I asked you to get a place with me, so I don’t think we’re anything less than friends with benefits,” he chuckled. 

“Landon, I’m serious,” she whispered. “If we’re going to make this work long enough that when it gets to the point where Archie starts asking questions about what he can call you and what you’re considered to him — I need to know how to answer those questions,” she said desperately. 

Landon looked into her eyes deeply. “You’re thinking that far, huh?” He asked softly. 

Hope nodded her head. “I love you,” she said. “And I don’t want this to fail, baby. I don’t want you to leave anymore and I want to know that in the end of everything — that my son and your son and possibly our future daughter or son will be okay and will know that we love them and each other,” 

“I love you too,” he chuckled. “You know I do and as for what we are, I’d like to call you my girlfriend if that’s okay with you?” He asked carefully and Hope chuckled and nodded her head. “And as for your son,” he said. “When it gets to the point where he is questioning my relationship to him, I can be anything you want me to be,” he whispered. “I know I’m not his dad but I also know that if he were to want me to be — I would be,” he added. 

“I know,” she whispered. 

“But I can be his step-dad, I can be his mommy’s boyfriend, fiancé, husband whatever we are by then,” he added. “But for Jack,” he whispered. “He knows you as his auntie Hope,” he added and Hope nodded her head. “And while it might get to a point where you’re going to be his step-mom, you will always be his auntie Hope so maybe I can be Arch’s uncle Landon,” he joked and that made Hope chuckle. 

“I think we can lean more towards mommy’s boyfriend for now,” Hope said and Landon nodded his head. “But I do like the sound of you becoming a daddy to one of my babies,” she said. 

“Our own baby,” he whispered. 

“Our baby,” she whispered. 

Landon smiled and nodded his head. “I think I like that idea,” 

She smiled back. “I like that too,” 

* * *

Landon couldn’t sleep — his eyes stayed open as he stared up at the ceiling. Hope was sound asleep as she laid her head on his chest. They slept together and it was amazing, he is glad he is able to remember it this time but something is off, everything is always off and he hates that. His kids haven’t woken up yet and the sound of thunder filled the air. It’s only 2 in the morning and all he can think about is his brother sleeping in a dirty cell at the station. Why the hell did he agree to that? Is he really that much of an awful person?

He has to make sure his brother is okay but he can’t go anywhere until later today. He gave Hope a tight hug and then kissed her forehead before carefully pushing her off his chest so he could sit up. He climbed overtop of her and his feet landed on the floor. He ruffled his hair before grabbing his underwear and pulling them up. He reached into his sweatshirt pocket from the ground and pulled out the flashdrive. He’s got to prove that his brother is not guilty. It was his dad’s fault that the girl is dead. 

Hope is a heavy sleeper so he knows she won’t wake up unless Archie is crying or something. He walked out of the bedroom in just his boxers before walking over to his couch in the living room and turning on the light and grabbed his laptop from his coffee table. He took a deep breath in and opened up the computer and the screensaver is of him and Jack when he was a baby. He will have to get a picture of him, his boys and Hope together now.

He inserted the flash drive into the side of his computer and then waited for it to load. His leg began to shake before it finally popped up. He clicked on it and opened it up. It was indeed a video file. The video of that night. 

Landon took a deep breath in. He didn’t want to relive that life but he has to and he knows that now. He has to do it for his brother. He can’t let him go to jail for something his father did — his father isn’t a good guy and Landon has known that since the beginning of time so he needs to fix this before Declan dies in a cell. 

He clicked play and the video footage started up. Landon watched as the clear road in rural LA filled his screen. He anxiously began to shake his leg as the screen just stayed boring and nothing interesting filled his eyes. 

He is scared about what is about to pop out in front of me but he knows it will be for the best. He needs his brother. He needs to make sure his family is okay. Landon bites down on his finger nails and then the screen glitches and then goes black - he sits up straight and his eyes fall into confusion. “What the fuck?” he cursed to himself as he clicked random keys on his keyboard. This isn’t happening. 

“Daddy,” Landon turned and looked over at the space in the hallway and saw his son standing there. He didn’t look sick or sad - just tired. “Archie is crying,” he said. Hope must’ve been extremely tired if she didn’t hear him. 

“Uh, okay buddy. I’ll be right there. Why don’t you go to bed with Auntie Hope?” he said as he closed the laptop and then stood up. Jack nodded his head before heading to Landon and Hope’s bedroom. Landon opened his laptop again and the footage was there but there wasn’t any footage. It was just a sentence. 

Landon’s heart stopped when he read it. 

**_You’re not the only smart one in the family, cuz._ **

**_Have fun figuring this shit out._ **

Landon noticed his camera was on so he quickly closed his computer and looked around the apartment. He doesn’t know what he’s gotten himself into but it can’t be good. 

* * *

  
They decided to head out to have some fun at the mall and take the boys for a little fun time at the park so now they are walking through the park - Archie is in the stroller that I am pushing and Jack is running around jumping up and down on everything he can find. Hope had her hand on his arm and they walked slowly. “So you’ve been extra quiet today,” Hope pointed out as she gave his arm a squeeze. 

“Just tired I guess,” he shrugged. 

Hope smirked. “Did I wear you out last night?” 

Landon chuckled. “I handled it pretty well if I say so myself,” he said — Hope knows when something’s bothering him and something is definitely bothering him. She pulled on him, making him stop moving and that’s when Landon let out a sigh and turned towards her. 

“I know when you’re lying, Landon, tell me what’s going on?” She asked, once more. 

He shrugged. “Dec got arrested last night,” 

“For what?” Hope was shocked. “That boy has never done anything wrong besides smoking pot — is that why he got arrested? Pot?” She asked. 

Landon shook his head. “Look, I’m handling it okay? I don’t want you or the boys to get hurt and that goes for Declan too so he asked me to keep you guys out of it,” he said. 

“You could get hurt doing this?” Hope asked. 

“Hope, don’t worry about this, please.” Landon sighed. 

“Don’t do that—,” Hope grabbed his face and made him look her straight in the eyes. “You need to tell me what the hell he is in for and why he doesn’t want us involved.” She added. 

“Babe, this isn’t your problem, okay?” Landon grabbed her face and looked in her blue eyes. “We will focus on our boys and our new life together, okay?” He added. 

She squinted her eyes. “I hate when you look at me with those green eyes,” she rolled her eyes. 

“You love them,” he leaned forward and gave her a soft kiss on the lips before there was a cry and Landon automatically knew where that cry came from. He and Hope looked over and saw Jack on the ground, crying. “Fuck,” Landon ran over to him and Hope grabbed Archie’s stroller and walked over. “Hey, buddy, you’re okay,” he said, grabbing him and pulling him up into his arms. 

“I hurt my wrist,” Jack cried. Landon felt so bad, why wasn’t he focusing on his son. He didn’t see this coming. Ugh. He hates himself right now. “Daddy, it hurts,” he added. 

Hope made her way over. “Hey, let me see, kiddo,” Jack handed his wrist to Hope and she carefully grabbed it. She examined it and while she did that, Landon looked passed his girlfriend and something dark caught his eye. A figure that quickly went away -- Landon had Jack in his arms and he would’ve gone after it but he couldn’t. “It’s not broken but we can go home and put ice on it as well as get a lollipop, how’s that sound?” she said. Jack nodded his head. 

Landon handed Jack off to Hope and then took a view steps towards where the figure was and notices something on the tree. He walked over to it and picked up a small piece of paper. He opened it up and looked down at the writing. It didn’t make any sense at all.   
  


* * *

Declan grabbed the bars in front of him. “What the hell are you doing here?” He asked his brother. 

“I’m getting messages, Dec,” Landon said, walking over to him. “I’m getting messages from people and I just got one while I was out with Hope and the boys and whoever is the reason behind all this madness was there and he left this,” Landon held out a piece of paper through the bars and Declan grabbed it and looked at it. 

He read it and looked up at his younger brother. “What is this? This isn’t English,” he said. 

He shook his head. “No it’s not,” he said. Declan looked at him confused. “It’s latitude and longitude,” he said. “And I looked it up and it’s in the middle of bourbon street and I won’t guess what I found out last night,” he said. 

Declan raised an eyebrow. 

“Hope’s family is from New Orleans,” he said. “And I’m pretty sure that this news and this message aren’t a consequence,” he said next. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m back! I’m going to finish this story now. Let me know what you think in the comments. More comments and I’ll post again tomorrow or Wednesday


	13. Author's Note

I have decided to stop this story completely, the way i wanted to go will not work. I am sorry but make sure to check out my other ones.

**Author's Note:**

> each chapter title is a song, this chapter is the man who can’t be moved by the script


End file.
